Contact
by tanith75
Summary: What if the night Hyde and Jackie stood in the Forman driveway, kissing, the sliding door hadn't been locked? What if Kelso had gotten outside in time to confront Hyde? What if ...
1. Chapter 1

"Contact"

A single touch, one moment of contact, is all it takes to convince Hyde that he will spend the rest of his life with Jackie. And an unexpected, violent moment of contact is all it takes to break the gang apart, forever.

This is a very different story from "Season 8 Redo", so be warned. It's been sitting on my hard drive for almost a year now and I thought it was time it finally saw the light of day. This will in no way affect the updates to "Season 8 Redo" it's just another little diversion for you. Hope you enjoy . . .

* * *

"_Contact is all it takes _

_To change your life, to lose your place in time"_

Duluth, Minnesota

1986

'Damn, it's cold.' was the thought that kept repeating itself in Hyde's head. 'It never felt this cold in Point Place, how could going a few hours north make such a difference?'

Hyde parked his car in the driveway of the small, but perfect looking house in front of him. He got out of the car and crunched his way through the snow to the mailbox, knowing there was no way Jackie had braved the cold just to go get a few bills. He emptied the mailbox, shoving the envelopes under his arm as he walked to the front door.

As he opened the door, a blast of warm air hit him and his body seemed to relax and unclench ever so slightly. The lights were on in every room. Jackie never liked being home without him at night and she took comfort in having each and every room artificially illuminated. He shook his head and tried not to think about the electric bill. As he tossed his keys and the bills on a nearby table, the sound of tiny feet on the hardwood floor made him turn his head.

"Hi Daddy." came the quiet, little voice. His daughter's curls bobbed up and down as she plodded with tired feet towards Hyde.

"Why aren't you in bed?" Hyde asked, scooping the little girl up in his arms and giving her a huge kiss on her perfect, heart-shaped mouth.

"Because, I told her she could stay up to kiss you goodnight."

He grinned at the sound of Jackie's voice even before he turned around to see her standing behind him.

"Steven, it's so late." she said, wrapping her arms around him and kissing him gently on the mouth.

"I know, doll, but people were still buyin' drinks. They wanna drink 'em, I gotta make 'em."

"You work too hard, baby." she said with a sigh taking the little girl from his arms. "Come on, angel girl. It's time for you to go to bed. Say 'nigh-nigh' to Daddy."

The little girl looked at Hyde with her huge blue eyes and smiled. "Nigh-nigh, Daddy." Her tiny hand flapped up and down as she waved goodnight.

Hyde forgot how tired he was, he forgot how cold it was outside and he just looked at his little girl's smile. It was identical to her mother's which meant, when he saw it, he had no choice but to give his daughter whatever she wanted. He gave her a kiss on the top of her curly brown head and whispered into her little ear, "Sweet dreams, baby girl."

Jackie gave him one more kiss, with a look in her eyes that told him she couldn't believe what a softy her former rebel had turned into. Then, she headed up the stairs with the almost sleeping girl in her arms.

Hyde watched them go for a second before he took off his boots. The fact that they belonged to him still amazed him. He was sure he didn't deserve either of them, but he gave everything he had in him to try and make them happy.

He hung up his coat and grabbed the bills he had set down next to his keys. Love, they had enough of. Money, on the other hand, seemed to be a different story. He headed straight for the fridge and grabbed a beer. Then, he sank down into his chair at the kitchen table finally giving his tired body a break. The house was so quiet, the crack of his beer opening echoed through the halls. As he sifted through the bills he took a long sip of the cold beer when suddenly, he had to remind himself to swallow. There, among the bills, was a small, square envelope addressed in familiar handwriting to, "Mr. and Mrs. Steven Hyde". Hyde set the envelope down like it had burned his hand. The letter sat on the table and Hyde just stared at it, not wanting to open it but knowing that he had to.

He heard Jackie come into the kitchen and he knew she was talking, but he had no idea what she was saying. He felt her come up behind him and wrap her warm arms around his neck. But still, he saw nothing but the envelope in front of him.

"Steven, did you hear what I said?"

As if he had been woken up from a trance his head snapped to look at her. She saw the expression on his face and she knew immediately. She followed his gaze to the table and let her eyes rest on the envelope.

"You have to open it." she said, in a voice too quiet for a whisper.

"No, I don't." he replied, even though they both knew he was going to.

She sat down on his lap and reached out her little hand, grabbing the envelope. She handed it to Hyde and looked at him with huge, sad eyes. He took it from her and ripped it open before his brain could tell his hands to stop. He scanned it quickly and then passed it to her, the expression on his face never changing. Jackie looked up at Hyde with a small smile. Then she looked down to read the letter and her smile quickly faded.

"Oh my God, Red's sick."

"We have to go back." Hyde said, quickly.

Jackie's eyes widened in terror and she shook her head. "Steven, we can't go back. If, if we get caught you'll be arrested."

"Then I guess we better not get caught." he said, clenching his jaw so tightly Jackie could hear his teeth grinding together.

"Steven, I know how much Red means to you, and I love him, too. But, we can't do this."

Her chin began to quiver and before the tears could fall she laid her head on his chest and placed both of her hands against his stomach. She ran her fingers up and down his tight muscles trying to calm herself as much as him. The contact between her fingertips and his body interrupted Hyde's racing mind and stirred the ever-present need in him to protect Jackie. It wasn't until he wrapped his arms around her that he realized she was shaking. He squeezed her tighter and kissed her on the top of her head. He knew the thought of returning to Point Place terrified Jackie. How could he ask her to go back there?

He shook his head and took a long sip of his beer. "I knew you shouldn't have sent those stupid cards, it was better when no one knew where we were."

Jackie knew it wasn't the letters he was angry at, it was the fact that he had to make the decision to bring his family back to Point Place. She knew how much Kitty's letters meant to him. One day, when she was putting away his clothes, she found every piece of mail Mrs. Forman had sent them in the past five years hidden in a box at the bottom of their closet. But, it had been so long since the last letter Jackie had wondered if she and Hyde had finally been forgotten in Point Place. She realized the only way Hyde would allow them to return to Point Place was if he felt she wasn't afraid. She knew what she had to do. Lifting her head off of his chest to look him in the eyes, she gave him a nod and the best smile she could muster.

"You're right, Steven. We have to go."

She wanted to mean it, she really did. But the memories of lying in a hospital bed as Donna's sharp, piercing voice rang in her ears were stuck in Jackie's head like a scary movie that she just couldn't forget.

Hyde knew his wife well enough to realize she was trying to be brave. But he could see that far off look in her eyes and he knew she was thinking about their last day in Point Place. She absent mindedly rubbed the faded scar above her eyebrow. No one but Hyde would've even noticed that she did it.

"I've gotta see him, Jackie. I've just gotta."

He couldn't explain it any better than that.

Hyde ran a hand up and down Jackie's cheek, trying to stop the movie he knew was playing in her mind. It seemed to work. The tortured look left her beautiful face and a small smile returned. She looked into Hyde's eyes and instantly realized what returning to their former home meant to him. If Red died before Hyde got to see him, Jackie knew he would never forgive himself. And for his peace of mind, she would return to Point Place.

Cupping her face, he gave her a nod, "We'll be okay." She returned his nod and kept her eyes locked with his, unable to look away.

She leaned into his ear and whispered, "Let's just go to bed."

Her breath was hot in his ear and it sent chills down his spine. He looked at her and nodded. They could figure things out in the morning. Hyde was exhausted and the hard kitchen chair was unforgiving.

He lifted Jackie out of his lap as easily as he lifted his tiny daughter. Hand in hand, the pair roamed through the house as Hyde checked and doubled checked to see that everything was locked. Jackie giggled, quietly, as Hyde turned out light after light, sighing each time.

"You know, the boogie monster isn't real, Jackie." he said in a teasing voice.

He turned to her expecting to see his grin returned when, in fact, he found the opposite. And even though it was dark, he could see the sadness in her eyes.

"Yes, he is."

* * *

At first when they stepped into Leo's BMW that day in 1978 they had no idea where they were going, they just drove. Jackie was so tired she slept curled up against Hyde almost the whole way. It wasn't until Hyde's body ached so much he could no longer physically drive that they stopped. He saw the city limits sign before he saw the city. Duluth. 

'This is as good as place as any.' Hyde thought to himself with a sigh.

But when he saw the city, he knew it was perfect. The freeway led up a hill and when he got to the highest peak and saw the city laid out in front of him he actually smiled. It was beautiful. Lake Superior was the biggest thing he had ever seen. He had never been to the ocean, but this was what he imagined it looked like. The houses were all set in the hills, it looked like something out of a movie.

'This, is a place to start over in.' Hyde nodded, satisfied that he had put enough distance between he and Jackie and Point Place.

The first thing they did was find a hotel. They used the money they had gotten from emptying out Jackie's bank account. They checked into the tiny room and then just sat there. Neither of them had the slightest idea what to do next. They had no clothes but the dirty ones on their bodies, very little money and nothing but each other. Hyde changed the bandages on Jackie's forehead with the extras Mrs. Forman had given him at the hospital. Jackie begged Hyde, for what seemed like the one hundredth time, to let her fix the various cuts and scrapes he had. But, he loudly protested and she just let it go. They stayed up and talked all night, Hyde's Zen facade crumbling by the second. What was there to hide from now? There was only the two of them left. The others were gone. Trying to be detached didn't seem to make any sense after what they had just gone through together.

They talked about everything but the one thing that completely occupied their thoughts. When they couldn't talk anymore they laid down in the unfamiliar bed in the dark hotel room and just held onto each other. It was new territory for the couple who couldn't seem to keep from attacking each other whenever they were in a horizontal position. The thing that surprised Hyde the most was how much he loved just holding Jackie. Every part of her fit some part of him, perfectly. Like, her head seemed to rest perfectly under his chin and her leg was just the right length to wrap around his. It was like someone had designed the two of them as a puzzle. One that finally had all of its' pieces.

"What are we gonna do, Steven?"

He didn't know the answer. But he knew there was one, and that was good enough for now.

"It's gonna be okay, Jackie."

And even though every logical part of Jackie's mind told her things would never be okay again, she believed him.

The next day, the answer came to Hyde in a most unexpected idea. School. They had to finish school. They were on their own and what kind of future could they have without a high school diploma? The only one he could think of was a future he was pretty sure the richest girl in Point Place was not interested in. When he told Jackie the first thing they had to do was enroll in a new high school, she looked stunned. But, knowing he was right, she reluctantly agreed.

School was awful. Just one more reminder of the friends they no longer had. Everyone talked about them, everyone stared at them. Hyde could've cared less, but he knew Jackie cared. He couldn't really blame the other kids. People didn't understand he and Jackie. And what people didn't understand - they were afraid of. They were two teenagers, with no parents, who just sort of fell out of the sky and into this new place.

They both found jobs at a small restaurant overlooking the lake. Hyde tended bar and Jackie waited tables. They were able to leave their cramped hotel room and rent a small apartment. They made it through Hyde's last year of high school together. The other kids wondered why Jackie clung to Hyde like her life depended on it. But no one ever asked her. If anyone even got close to her Hyde was there, and no one wanted to mess with Hyde. He would ditch the last five minutes of every class so he could be there, waiting for her outside whatever room she was in when the bell rang. Sometimes, Jackie would hang out on the football field and watch the cheerleaders practice, but even then she wasn't alone. Hyde would sit a few rows behind her, quietly waiting.

When the next fall came and it was time for Jackie to go to school without Hyde she begged him not to make her go. But he did. She never knew it but Hyde befriended the biggest badass in Jackie's grade. Putt was his name. He was a huge guy, and he watched Jackie every minute of every day. And of course, Hyde's reputation remained even after he graduated. No one messed with Jackie.

When Jackie graduated, Hyde was so proud of her. She was so different from the spoiled brat he had known in Point Place. But then again, so was he. The old Jackie would never have survived a year of high school alone. The night of her graduation Hyde gave her a present. A tiny present in a black box. She cried and squealed and giggled when she opened it. It was the first glimpse he had seen of the old Jackie since they had left Point Place.

They got married that summer. The only people there were the judge that married them and the clerk that stamped their papers. But it really didn't matter. The only people they had in life were each other and that was the way they both wanted it. Hyde had saved every dime he possibly could and he bought Jackie a wedding dress. He knew she really wanted one, but would never ask him for it. Not when they barely had enough money to pay for heat.

He knew their life sounded sad and hard to other people, but they never felt that way. They had chosen their life, and it was theirs and no one else's.

When Jackie told him she was pregnant later that year he just smiled. "We're a family, Steven." she had said, and it was true. For the first time in both of their lives. The Formans had always made him feel like they were his family, but, of course, they were no longer in Hyde's life, no matter how much Hyde had wished they could be. And when he and Jackie had their beautiful daughter they also bought a tiny house that Jackie made so perfect they never noticed how cramped it was.

It was a short while after the baby was born that Jackie sent the first letter. In all the years since they had left their lives in Point Place behind it was their first fight. She didn't have to tell him, but they never kept secrets from each other.

"I sent Mrs. Forman a birthday card."

He didn't even wait to hear the rest, he just started yelling. When he finally stopped he looked up to see Jackie sobbing. He never felt as horrible in his entire life as he did at that moment.

"It'll be fine," he reassured her, "just forget about it."

But he didn't sleep for weeks after that. Every night he listened to the cars drive by their house, waiting for one to stop. To stop and then to come into his tiny, perfect house and take his family away from him. But no one came. A letter came instead.

It was sitting on the kitchen table one night when he got home from work. Jackie was feeding the baby and he opened it and read it out loud.

_Dear Steven and Jackie,_

_You have no idea how excited I was to get your letter. I've missed you both so much and I just wish I could see your sweet little faces. Don't worry, I didn't tell anyone, well, except Red of course, that you wrote me. I'm just glad to know you're happy. _

_I'm just going to bring this up once , and then I swear I'll never mention it again. I know some horrible things happened the day you left._ _But you need to come home now. My house isn't the same without Steven here. And Point Place is just too quiet without Jackie around. _

_Please write me again._

_I love you both,_

_Mrs. Forman_

Hyde read the letter over and over. And he read all the letters that would follow. He knew Mrs. Forman would keep her word. So he stopped waiting for someone to come and take away Jackie and his little girl and slowly, life returned to normal. As long as they stayed in Duluth everything would be fine. But deep down he always knew they'd have to go back someday. That's the funny thing about what you fear the most, it always finds you. No matter where you go.

* * *

"Steven, can you get that please?" Jackie called from the bathroom. She only had about 15 minutes until the baby woke up and she hadn't even brushed her teeth yet. 

Hyde got up from his breakfast, newspaper still in hand, and grabbed the phone.

"Yeah?" he answered absent mindedly.

"Steven?"

Hyde almost dropped the phone. He knew he was smiling because he could feel his face move, but he had no idea if he was talking.

"Steven, is that you?" The voice asked again.

"Mrs. Forman?" he replied.

"Oh my goodness, it is you." he could hear her softly crying and laughing at the same time. "How's Jackie?"

"She's fine."

"And your little girl, how's your little girl?"

Hyde smiled again just thinking about his daughter. "She's perfect."

"Did you get the letter I sent?"

Hyde cleared his throat, trying to think of something to say. "Yeah, we got it." he paused, wishing Jackie was standing next to him so she could take the phone. "Mrs. Forman, I ..." he stammered wondering what in the world he could say, "I'm so sorry."

"Thank you, sweetie. But the doctors say the cancer hasn't spread, which is good." the quickness with which Kitty spoke betrayed how upset she really was. "And you know Red, he says he's gonna stick his foot up cancer's ass."

Hyde chuckled, quietly. Typical Red. If anyone could kick cancer's ass, it would be Red Forman.

"I just know he's going to be alright." Kitty said, firmly.

Hyde nodded into the phone, unable to find his voice.

"Steven, you know I wouldn't ask you, but I think it would mean so much to Red to see you and Jackie and your little girl."

There it was. The request Hyde had both hoped for and been terrified of hearing. How could he refuse the woman who had been the only real mother he'd ever known. He couldn't. Not when he wanted to see Red as badly as Mrs. Forman wanted he and Jackie to come. Maybe even more.

"Yeah. Yeah, we'll come right away."

"Thank you, Steven," he could hear her quiet sniffles and he knew whatever the consequences, he had made the right decision. The only decision. They had to go back.

He didn't want to say it, but he had to. "Mrs. Forman, no one can know we're coming. Especially Eric and Donna." When she didn't answer him Hyde knew she agreed.

"No one else will know. I promise you, Steven." she started talking so quickly Hyde could barely understand her. "Eric and Donna have their own place over on 19th, they're never over here anymore." she paused and Hyde wondered if that meant Mrs. Forman had been dealing with Red's illness without the help of her son. He hoped she hadn't, but in his gut he knew she had.

Kitty continued, quietly. "I miss you two so much. Things are ..." Her voice trailed off leaving Hyde to wonder what else was going on in Point Place that made her so upset.

"Nothing's been the same since you left." Hyde could hear the sadness in her voice, and it broke his heart. This was more than Red being sick, there was something else she wasn't telling him. Something else that had turned the happiest woman he had ever known into the shattered person he was speaking to now.

* * *

He heard little feet coming down the stairs and he shook his head, pulling himself out of his fog. 

"Daddy, why are you sad?"

Hyde put on the best smile he could come up with and grabbed the little girl, throwing her in the air. She squealed and giggled and to Hyde, it was the best sound in the whole world.

"What do you want for breakfast, angel?" he asked her, carrying her on his hip to the cupboards.

"Cheerios!"

"Cheerios would be awesome." Hyde said and again she giggled.

"You guys are having fun down here" Jackie said, entering the kitchen. She took the box of cereal from Hyde and he sat the little girl down at the table. Jackie turned and looked at them over her shoulder and it was only then that she noticed how tense Hyde was.

Jackie brought over the cereal and she joined them at the table. "So," she looked at Hyde, "who was on the phone?"

He gave her the tiniest smile and said, "It was Mrs. Forman."

Jackie swallowed and kept her eyes on her husband.

"We're going home, Jackie."


	2. Chapter 2

Alright, updates will not usually come this quickly. But I felt like a big meanie leaving you guys hanging like that. But that doesn't mean I won't do it again ;)

Thanks for the reviews!!! You guys are awesome! Do I have to say I don't own anything? You guys know that, right? I'm just borrowing these characters. But when I'm done with them I'm not giving them back to the writers, they don't have any idea what to do with them, they just screw them up ;)I'd give them to all my favorite writers here, because you guys know what to do with them!

* * *

_Point Place, Wisconsin_

_1978_

'Screw Forman and Donna._'_

The same thought kept repeating itself over and over in Hyde's mind as he stood in the driveway shooting hoops. He and Jackie could do whatever they wanted. If Kelso was gonna be a big baby about it, that was his problem. 'Besides,' he thought with a grin, 'Kelso's not that bright of a bulb, it'll be a while before he catches on.'

Hyde was sick of the way Eric was constantly bad mouthing Jackie. He never even gave her a chance. Hyde had listened to Eric whine about Donna for years and the minute Hyde actually had a girl in his life all Eric wanted to do was rip on her. All he could talk about was her ruining the group. He was like a broken record constantly telling Hyde he couldn't be with Jackie. Hyde could've pointed out that Kelso had hurt Jackie, time and time again.

But it wouldn't have mattered.

Hyde could've pointed out that it was Kelso, _not Jackie_, who had done the leaving. It was Jackie who had been left behind. And the great Kelso, whose feelings were apparently more important than Jackie's, who had been a big jerk. Hyde wondered why when Kelso had cheated on Jackie, time and time again, no one had ever insisted that he tell her. In fact, the only person who ever seemed concerned that Jackie know the truth about Kelso, was Hyde. So, why was it that it was alright for Kelso to cheat on Jackie but not for Hyde to date a _single_ Jackie? Hyde could've pointed out that was fucked-up logic.

But it wouldn't have mattered.

So, Hyde just kept his mouth shut.

He didn't know what was happening to him. He used to revel in burning Jackie along with everyone else. But things had changed. There was something about he and Jackie that fit. They didn't make any sense and yet they seemed to make perfect sense. He ran, she ran after him. He pulled away, she moved closer. He frowned, she giggled. They were polar opposites, and yet they brought out the best in each other. Hyde didn't understand why his best friend couldn't see that. He'd seen it for a long time now. Longer than he cared to admit to himself. And although he would never be able to pick the exact moment Jackie had crept her way into his heart he knew she was there to stay. Jackie had always run to his shoulder to do her crying, and he finally decided he should offer her his shoulder for other purposes.

He knew he should tell Kelso, but he just didn't want to go through the drama of it all. And maybe, a small part of him knew that Kelso would automatically try and get Jackie back. And maybe, an even smaller part of him worried that she would go.

So he said nothing.

It was just easier that way.

But, as he saw her walk up the driveway any and all thoughts left his mind. She gave him that teasing smile that hit him like a hammer in his stomach. Then, she grabbed the ball and tossed it to him, playfully. He listened to her ramble on about setting her hair. He was amazed that he was able to concentrate on her words when all he wanted to do was hold her and kiss and feel her tiny body pressed up against him. God how he wanted to kiss her. He wanted to kiss her like he wanted to breathe - he had no choice in the matter, it was just something he had to do or he would die.

When he finally got his chance he took full advantage of it. He kissed her like it was his last chance, ever, to kiss her. It was filled with lust, and passion and heat and everything he'd always fantasized about when he looked at her. It was funny to have fantasy turn into reality. Maybe if he hadn't been so caught up in her, in how she felt and how she tasted he would've remembered they were standing in front of a glass door.

Maybe.

* * *

_Inside the Forman's kitchen Eric and Donna watched, sadly, as Kelso laughed at the sight of Hyde and Jackie making out. _

"_Why is Hyde kissin' Jackie?"_

_As he watched the way Hyde clung to Jackie and she curled her fingers through his hair, it_ _didn't take Kelso long to answer his own question. He turned first to Eric, who only stared back at Kelso. Then he faced Donna, who could only shake her head and shrug, unable to break her friend's heart by telling him the truth._

_Kelso's face went from confused and hurt to angry. Furiously angry. Jackie was his. Always had been, always would be. And there was no way in hell he was letting Hyde have her. He knew what he had to do._

"_He's dead!"_

_He slammed the jar in his hand down on the counter and took long, angry strides towards the sliding door. As he yanked it open, he heard Donna calling after him. But he didn't stop . . ._

* * *

Hyde slung his arm around Jackie's shoulders and led her down the driveway. Maybe some part of his brain heard the sliding door open, but that part was overtaken by the part that was concentrating on Jackie. So he never saw it coming. 

They made it to the curb before he heard Kelso calling his name. The old Hyde was always on guard, so this would never have happened to him. But, this new person who walked in Hyde's boots and wore his Levi's forgot for a split second that the world was a place where more bad things happened then good. So when he heard his name, he turned. And Kelso's fist hit him square in the jaw.

He heard it more than felt it. He heard the crack of Kelso's knuckles on his jawbone and Jackie screaming his name. He had to stop and rub his throbbing jaw, the pain was the only thing that assured him that this was, indeed, happening. Kelso had caught Hyde off guard, but he recovered quickly. Hyde had never lost a fight and there was a reason for that. He was good at it.

Hyde was on Kelso immediately. He flew at him, tackling him right in the gut and knocking him to the ground. He heard Kelso's head crack on the driveway and the sound made him sick to his stomach.

"What the hell, Kelso?" Hyde yelled at his friend laying in the driveway. He could've easily kicked the crap out of him as he lay there dazed, but Hyde simply didn't want to. Instead he crossed over to Jackie and grabbed her hand.

"Are you okay?" she asked him. She looked so scared. No one had ever looked at him like that before. No one had ever cared before. So he just reached out and brushed her cheek with his hand.

"Let's just get the hell out of here," he said, taking her tiny hand in his, and for the second time he turned his back on the driveway.

This time, he heard the footsteps following them.

He turned to see Kelso staggering towards him. Kelso raised his arm to punch Hyde again. But Kelso wasn't as lucky this time. Hyde easily stepped out of the way and Kelso spun down to the ground. Hyde had no desire to fight, but he wasn't interested in being a punching bag either. So he grabbed the collar of Kelso's shirt, lifted him off of the ground and punched him across the face. Not hard enough to knock him out, but hard enough to let him know that the fight was over. Again, Kelso fell to the ground. This time Hyde watched to make sure he stayed down. He saw Eric and Donna standing behind Kelso and it didn't take much to figure out whose side they were on. Donna looked at Hyde like she wanted to punch him herself. But it was the look on Eric's face that ate at Hyde. Eric was staring in disgust, not at Hyde, but at Jackie.

"I told you this would happen, Hyde!" Eric yelled across the driveway.

Hyde had taken all the abuse he was going to take for one day so he yelled back. "Oh shut up, Forman!" he paused and looked at Eric and Donna. "Kelso left Jackie." Then he turned back to Kelso and yelled out, "_You_ left _her_. She's done nothing wrong!"

Kelso seemed to gain energy from the support of Eric and Donna so he stood back up and wiped a trickle of blood from his nose.

"It didn't have to be like this, man." Hyde said quietly to Kelso. "I didn't want this." Hyde felt Jackie come up next to him and grab his arm, trying to pull him away.

They all stood there, in the middle of the Forman driveway, and stared at each other. Hyde looked at the five of them and he saw an imaginary line drawn down the middle. Where one gang had once stood - there were now two teams. They weren't one anymore and the thought pissed him off beyond belief. But he was still going to walk away because he heard Jackie's quiet voice in his ear.

"Come on, Steven, let's go. Let's just go, okay?"

Maybe it was seeing Jackie show Hyde tenderness. Maybe it was the look Hyde gave her. Whatever it was, something inside Kelso snapped. He ran for Hyde. But he never took into account the fact that Jackie was clutching onto Hyde's arm. So when Kelso reached Hyde it was Jackie, and not Hyde, that went down.

It all happened so fast Hyde never even had time to grab her. When Kelso ran into them Hyde had his feet firmly planted but Jackie was so much smaller than Kelso, he knocked her over like she wasn't even there. He ran into her with such force that she spun around and smacked, face forward, onto the curb below. She didn't move after she hit.

Everyone was screaming at once, but it was Hyde who reached down to grab Jackie. He turned her over and yelled out when he saw her. Her forehead was split open down to the bone and blood was pouring out of the wound. He knew she was unconscious because she felt like a limp doll in his arms. Hyde's head started spinning.

He heard so many people yelling Jackie's name he didn't even know which voice was his. Hyde took one last look at the tiny girl bleeding in the street. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Donna race up to Jackie and crouch down over her. He saw Eric taking his shirt off to wrap it around Jackie's head. And when he was sure that they could take care of Jackie, he decided to take care of Kelso.

Kelso saw Hyde come towards him and he backed up. A horrified look on his face.

"Holy shit, Hyde. I didn't mean to do that. It was an accident."

Hyde didn't wait for whatever Kelso was going to say next. His first punch landed in Kelso's gut, doubling him over. Then Hyde grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him backwards until the wall of the garage forced them both to stop. Hyde used one hand to prop Kelso up so he could feel the full weight of the punches he was about to receive. Hyde threw all of his weight behind his right fist and knocked Kelso across the jaw. Then, he let go of Kelso's upper body and watched him slump down to the ground. Hyde followed him down and just kept punching. He hit his face, he hit him in the gut, he hit whatever he could. He could hear Donna and Eric screaming at him to stop but when he turned to look at them the only thing he saw was Jackie laying in the street.

In his mind all he could think of was Jackie and what Kelso had done to her. It would never end with Kelso, he would keep trying to get Jackie back until it drove Hyde insane. And with every punch that Hyde delivered he saw Jackie leaving him. Like his mother and father before her. The thought of one more person he cared about leaving fueled the violence in Hyde. So he hit harder. And he kept hitting until he heard Kelso speak.

"You can't have her, Hyde. You can't have her."

And then a thought stopped him - 'But I do have her.' And with that, Hyde stopped. He had Jackie and she needed him.

'What am I doing?' Hyde thought to himself. He didn't want to hurt his best friend. All he had wanted to do was protect his girlfriend. Unfortunately for Hyde, the two things seemed to be hopelessly linked at the moment.

He left Kelso on the driveway bleeding and mumbling and ran to Jackie. The blood continued to flow right through the shirt Eric had wrapped around her head. Shoving Eric and Donna aside, Hyde leaned down and picked her up.

"Jesus Christ, Hyde," Eric spat at him, "it was an accident! You almost killed Kelso."

Hyde yelled back, "What the hell is the matter with you, man? Isn't it enough that she's bleeding out here in the street? Do you really still have to hate her so much.?"

The silence gave Hyde his answer and he maneuvered his way around Eric towards the El Camino.

"Get out of my way! I'm taking her to the hospital."

He ran for his car as fast as he could. He didn't need to look back to know that Donna and Eric weren't behind him.

* * *

Hyde's foot was pressed all the way to the floor and he didn't need to look at the speedometer to know he was driving way too fast. But the more blood that spilled from Jackie's head, the faster Hyde drove. He knew from Kitty patching up hundreds of cuts on he and the others that head wounds bled the worst, but Jackie's wound seemed to bleed more than any he had ever seen. He kept one hand on the steering wheel and the other on her head laying motionless in his lap. He pressed as hard as he could to stop the constant flow, but it didn't seem to be working. 

"Come on! God dammit!" he screamed to the slow moving car he was quickly approaching. With a swift look over his shoulder he darted into the oncoming traffic's lane and passed the vehicle in front of him. As soon as he was clear, he swerved back into his lane eliciting a honk from the car he had just passed and the car that whose lane he had invaded and nearly hit head-on.

He eased off the gas pedal just slightly, realizing it wouldn't matter how quickly they got to the hospital if they got there dead. He took his hand off the steering wheel for a moment to reach up and rip off his sunglasses, tossing them to the floor. He needed to be able to see the road and it was dark enough without the sunglasses adding to it.

How had he gotten here? In a car with a bleeding and unconscious Jackie Burkhart in his lap. How had the friendships that he had had almost his whole life crumbled in mere minutes? Where the hell did they go from here?

There were too many questions and Hyde couldn't waste valuable brain space thinking about the answers. Not when he had to focus on getting Jackie to the hospital. The road was clear now, nothing but tall pine trees and the winding one-lane highway stretched out in front of him. He started to feel like things were going his way, until he looked in his rear-view mirror.

There were headlights following them. Following them at a dangerously fast speed. Even in the black night he knew it was Kelso.

On any other night the sight of Kelso's van approaching would be a welcome sight. But tonight Hyde knew it only meant trouble. The minutes that Hyde had slowed down had allowed Kelso to gain ground and now he was quickly catching up to the El Camino. How Kelso had managed to get his beaten body off of the Forman driveway and into a car baffled Hyde.

Hyde took his hand momentarily off of Jackie's head to try and better control his too-fast car. As soon as he did, the blood trickled down her face, landing in his lap.

"Fuck!" he screamed to no one but himself. Some choice, put both hands on the wheel and avoid an accident but watch more and more blood drip out of your girlfriend's open head. He opted to put his hand back on Jackie. He had no idea how serious her injury was, but he was going with the assumption that it was bad.

It seemed that Kelso's car was only inches away from Hyde's back bumper now and as fast as Hyde drove, Kelso drove faster. He watched as Kelso pulled into the lane next to him and drove up until the cars were speeding down the road side-by-side. Playing chicken was something Kelso and Hyde had done before. But this, was a new game entirely.

Hyde took his eyes off the road and glanced in Kelso's direction. Kelso was bloodied and crazed. Hyde had never seen his friend look so out of control. He was screaming at Hyde and gesturing wildly. Hyde couldn't hear his words, but he got the gist of them. Pull over.

No. There was no way he was stopping. He turned his attention back to the road in front of him and pushed even harder with his right foot, trying to coax more speed out of his car.

The deliberate bump to the left side of the El Camino was something Hyde had not been expecting. Kelso was actually trying to run him off the road. His right hand left Jackie's head and he frantically tried to regain control of his car.

"What the hell, Kelso?" Hyde yelled at his closed window. "You're gonna kill us!"

Almost on cue, Kelso's van again bumped the driver's side of the Camino. This time, Hyde had no chance. The contact between the two cars proved too much for either driver to handle.

The Camino swayed from side to side hitting Kelso's van in the process. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the van begin to spin. Hyde slammed on the brakes and swerved to avoid being hit by Kelso. The combination of the sudden jerk of the steering wheel and the incredibly fast speed sent Hyde and Jackie cruising towards the ditch. As Hyde quickly took in his surroundings he realized they couldn't be in a worse spot to lose control of a car. The narrow shoulder dropped off, steeply, into a ravine and that led out into the open forest with hundreds of unforgiving and unbending trees. And Hyde and Jackie were headed straight for them. Combine those facts with the fact that they were traveling down a light-less highway - and Hyde knew they were absolutely screwed. Try as Hyde might, he couldn't regain control and they bumped their way across the shoulder and headed into the thick woods that lined the road.

Jackie's head bounced in Hyde's lap and he could hear her hitting the steering wheel. He had to stop them soon or a tree would. Knowing that it would be better for the rear of the car to hit a tree then the front, he made a quick decision to purposefully crash. He used his right hand to hold onto Jackie and with his left hand yanked on the steering wheel as hard as he could. The car twisted until the back-end fish-tailed around and collided with a tree. He could hear the metal crunch and the glass shatter. Shards flew everywhere and he could feel them cut into his skin. The impact of the crash slammed him into his door. Instead of trying to protect himself he held onto to Jackie and just let his body absorb the hit. 'Better me than her' was the solitary thought that ran through his head.

He felt his left arm crunch between his body weight and the door and instantly knew it had been broken. His head slammed, mercilessly, up against the window and for a moment he feared he was about to lose consciousness. He shook his head, knowing he had to focus, willing his brain to stay awake.

His first instinct was to look down at Jackie. She had tiny pieces of glass everywhere making her shine and glisten like a bloody diamond. Her face had taken the worst of the hits to the steering wheel and her bottom lip was split open and the two trails of blood on her face joined at her chin to become one. He thought for a moment about trying to pick the glass off of her, but the sound of tires screeching convinced him he had other things to worry about.

Hyde looked up towards the road they had just driven off of. Kelso's van was spinning down it, hopelessly out of control. Hyde watched as it hit the shoulder, tipped and began to roll. It was only at that moment that he realized it was headed straight towards he and Jackie.

"Jesus Christ!" he yelled even as he began to move. Instantly, pain shot up his side and he realized his left arm was virtually unusable. He was now faced with the task of dragging he and Jackie out of the car with only one arm.

He let go of Jackie and twisted around to open the car door with his right arm. As Hyde frantically pulled himself out of the car he tried to ignore the sounds the van made as it flipped over and over, each second getting closer. As soon as his feet hit the ground he reached back in to grab Jackie, saying a quick prayer to a God he was pretty sure wasn't listening at the moment. He had never been so glad that Jackie was as tiny as she was. With his one arm, he grabbed underneath her armpit and pulled her towards him. As soon as her head slid off of the seat it dropped backwards and slammed against the doorframe.

"Shit!" he screamed.

Without even thinking, he reached froward to cradle her head with his left arm. He groaned in agony as his arm stubbornly refused to move. He kept pulling and pulling with the only arm he had, until finally, she was completely out of the car. Then he leaned down and yanked her upper body towards him til he was able to get her stomach against his shoulder. He draped her body over his and stood back up. Clutching onto Jackie, Hyde ran as fast as he could, tripping and stumbling, but still managing to get them both out of the way mere seconds before Kelso's van smashed into a nearby tree just missing the spot where Jackie and Hyde had stood moments earlier. The sound of Kelso's wreck triggered a realization in Hyde's brain.

His best friend was inside that van.

No matter what had happened to cause the accident, no matter what had taken place in the Forman driveway, Kelso was still Hyde's friend and Hyde needed to get to him.

Hyde kneeled down in the thick grass and tried as best he could to lay Jackie down gently. He quickly laid his ear on her chest to make sure her heart was beating and her lungs were working. Once he was satisfied she was alive, he kissed her quickly on her bloodied mouth and stood back up.

As Hyde ran towards Kelso he heard what he could only assume to be another motorist who had witnessed the accident call out to him.

"Are you alright?"

Hyde wanted to use every curse word in his vocabulary to explain that, no, they were most definitely _not_ alright.

"Go call an ambulance!" was all he yelled back.

Hyde reached Kelso's van and surveyed the damage as quickly as he could. It was a mangled wreck. In the back of his mind Hyde knew his friend would not survive this. Pushing that thought out of his brain, Hyde knelt down next to the upside down van and looked through the open driver's side window. He was confused to find the van empty. But when he saw the shattered glass in nearly every window, he realized Kelso had been thrown from the van.

Standing up, he scanned the brush looking for any sign of his friend. The headlights from the smashed vehicles cast just enough light for Hyde to finally make out Kelso's form lying in a heap twenty feet to the left of the wreck. Hyde glanced over his shoulder to make sure Jackie still lay as he had left her, then he then took off in a sprint towards Kelso.

Looking at the mess of a person that had once been Kelso made Hyde sick to his stomach. It was hard to tell what wounds had been inflicted by Hyde and what wounds had been caused by the crash. But it didn't really matter how they had gotten there. They were there, and Hyde knew they were fatal.

His face was covered with slashed skin. His body was covered in crusted blood from Hyde's punches, mixed with fresh blood from the accident. His long legs lay in such an unnatural position Hyde knew broken bones were involved. What surprised Hyde the most, was the fact that Kelso was still moving.

He knelt down next to his battered friend and tried to assess where he could try and help him. Kelso started to cough and tiny droplets of blood flew out of his mouth.

"Hyde?" Kelso croaked out.

"Don't try to talk, man." was the only thing Hyde could think to say. He had no idea what a critically wounded person was supposed to do, but he was pretty sure it wasn't talk.

"I'm ..." another cough, and more blood and still Kelso tried to continue. "I'm ..."

"Kelso, God dammit! Shut the hell up and sit still!" Hyde again looked for something he could do. But there was nothing, he was completely helpless. Couldn't he just turn back time one hour and stop all of this. Couldn't he just go back to that driveway and save his friend's life. But this was real life and those things weren't possible. The only thing he could do was watch as a nightmare played itself out in front of his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Hyde." Kelso finally got out. "I'm so sorry."

Hyde had seen death bed confessions in the movies, but actually being the recipient of one was devastating. He didn't know what to say to Kelso, should he tell him to keep quiet and he would be fine. Or should he let his friend share his last words and just listen.

Hyde chose the latter.

"I know you are, man. I'm sorry, too. I never wanted any of this." Hyde meant what he said like never before. This was never supposed to happen. He and Jackie were never supposed to tear the group apart. Kelso was never supposed to die. Jackie was never supposed to ... he made up his mind stop thinking that thought and turned his attention back to Kelso.

Another cough and Hyde knew Kelso only had moments left. He gave Hyde a simple, and pained smile and reached out his arm to touch Hyde, needing one last moment of human contact. Hyde grabbed Kelso's outstretched hand and leaned in to hear Kelso's whispered words.

"Live a good life, Hyde."

There was so much Hyde wanted to say, but time had run out. He watched as Kelso's body shook and twitched and then stopped moving completely.

His friend was gone.

Their group was gone.

Hyde's life, as he knew it, was gone.

It had ended in a dirty field along a pothole riddled highway. Or maybe it had ended in the Forman driveway as a tiny brunette cracked her skull open. Or maybe it had even ended on the dingy basement couch while "The Price Is Right" played in the background and Hyde ran his hands up and down Jackie's lilac colored shirt.

Hyde looked down at his lifeless friend and then he looked over his shoulder towards his bleeding and unconscious girlfriend.

There was no way life could get any worse.

But then, Hyde heard Eric and Donna's voices calling out to him in the darkened night and he realized - things could always get worse.

* * *

**A/N **Okay, don't hate me. I told you this was going to be dramatic. Let me know what you think. 


	3. Chapter 3

Wow! Thanks for all your reviews! You guys are just awesome!! And a big thanks to luvcali, gah-linda and heatherlea who have been my constant sounding boards on this one. Drinks are on me, girls ;)

To those wonderful Eric and Donna fans who are feeling a little sad right now, I'm sorry. I don't hate Eric or Donna. Nor do all Jackie/Hyde fans. I love them, too. Before you start getting too worked-up just wait for the story to explain things to you. The point of this story is to explore what would've happened to all the characters in an extremely, extremely horrible situation. Then, if you still don't like Eric and Donna in this story, I guess, maybe this isn't the story for you.

I own nothing. Just borrowing.

Some language in this chapter.

* * *

Chapter 3 

_Point Place High School_

_1977_

_Jackie leaned into_ _her open locker trying to get a better look at the mirror hanging on the door. Taking the time she was supposed to be using to switch classes she carefully reapplied her lipstick._

_A loud bang against the locker next to her startled her and she turned to see Hyde standing next to her with a mischievous grin spread across his face._ _Kelso walked up behind him and took his place on the other side of Jackie. _

"_What are you doin' right now?" Hyde asked._

"_I'm getting ready for Spanish which is what you two idiots should be doing, too."_

"_No uh-uh," Kelso shook his head, furiously, "Mrs. Richards is sick today and there's a sub."_

"_And guess who stole the attendance sheet?" Hyde asked, holding up said sheet, proudly._

_Jackie looked back and forth between the two guys. She was hesitating slightly, but Hyde knew one small push would send her over to the dark side with them._

"_That sub will never even know we're gone," Hyde added as Kelso nodded in agreement._

"_Fine," Jackie said, with a defeated sigh. Secretly, she was thrilled to spend an hour goofing off with Hyde and Kelso. But she didn't want them to know that._

"_Kick ass! I love skippin' class!" Kelso yelled, his fist pumping triumphantly in the air._

"_What did you morons have in mind?" Jackie asked Hyde, her eyebrow arched in suspicion._

"_How about a field trip to the parking lot?" was Hyde's response._

_The trio of rule breakers looked at each other and smiles spread slowly across their knowing faces._

_Five minutes later they were gathered in Hyde's El Camino, Jackie squished between the two guys and smoke as thick as the lunchroom chili circling the air. _

"_Dónde está Esteban, Miguel y ... y ...?" Kelso paused, trying to remember how in the hell to say Jackie in Spanish._

"_Yackie." Hyde finished with a nod_

"_Yackie?" Jackie looked at him. "Where the hell did you get Yackie?"_

"_I don't know, man. That's what Fez calls you."_

_Jackie burst out laughing spraying Hyde with tiny droplets of spit._

"_Nice, Jackie. Real classy," Hyde said, taking off his glasses to clean them._

_She stuck her tongue out at him and then proceeded to grab the glasses from Hyde's hands and put them on her own face. Kelso laughed and pointed at Hyde who was trying to do his best to look pissed at Jackie. _

"_Dude, she looks hot in your sunglasses." Kelso grinned, his mouth hanging open like a puppy dog._

_A less stoned Hyde would've been able to deny that Jackie did look incredibly sexy. But this Hyde couldn't._

"_Yeah. You do look pretty smokin' in my shades."_

_Jackie's smile widened to mega-watt proportions. "Does that mean I get to keep 'em?" she asked Hyde, excitedly._

_Hyde pretended to give the ridiculous question a moment's thought. "Ummmm ... NO!" He reached out and grabbed the shades from the pouting brunette's face._

"_You guys, all this Spanish talk is really making me hungry for a burrito. Ooh ... or tacos."_

_Hyde added, "Or nachos, man. I love nachos. That's a sweet word to say, too. Naaaachos. I'm gonna say it like that, now. It sounds better."_

_Jackie looked back and forth between her two friends, each lost in their own munchie dreams._

"_I've got Oreos in my purse," she declared with a grin._

"_Hand 'em over!" _

"_Purses rock!"_

_Jackie reached down in between her feet and fished out a baggie full of tasty chocolate cookies. She handed one to her scruffy friend and then, one to her man pretty friend, saving one, of course, for herself._

_Jackie opened hers up and began eating the cream out of the middle. Hyde shoved the entire thing in his mouth in one bite. And Kelso, began eating around the edges in a circular motion like he was eating an ear of corn._

_The three sat in silence, the only sound the crunching of cookies._

"_Dónde está la leche?"_

"_Thanks a lot, Kelso. Now_ **I**_ want milk."_

"Hyde? Kelso? Jesus Christ, somebody answer!"

The sound of Eric's voice brought Hyde out of his memories of the past and back into the horror that was his future.

'What have I done?'

"Kelso? Hyde? If you guys can hear us, answer!"

But Hyde couldn't. He couldn't say anything. What was there to say. Nothing could explain the trauma he had just witnessed. So, instead of calling out to Eric and Donna, Hyde sat in the grass motionless and silent, still clutching Kelso's hand.

'What have I done?'

"Kelso? Hyde?"

The cries were getting louder now. The crunching of sticks and the snap of weeds became more distinct. Hyde knew Eric and Donna were close, which meant these were his final moments with Kelso. He let go of his friend's hand and reached up to gently close Kelso's eyes.

'What have I done?'

He tried to pick off some of the leaves and grass that seemed to be stuck to every inch of Kelso's body. It seemed to Hyde a trite and insignificant gesture, but it was the only thing he could think to do.

'I killed him.'

He almost wished for Eric and Donna's presence so he wouldn't have to be alone with his own thoughts. Staring down at Kelso, Hyde could think of no way to say goodbye. There hadn't yet been a word invented that expressed how he felt. And even if there was a word, Hyde knew he would never be able to get it out of his mouth. His throat seemed frozen. He couldn't swallow, he couldn't breathe and the tightness began to travel down towards his chest and up towards his head. He felt like he was suffocating and exploding at the same time.

So, Hyde did the only thing he could think of.He reached out and, ever so slightly, frogged Kelso on the arm.

'Bye, man.'

And with that, Hyde pushed himself off of the ground and turned away from Kelso. His arm was throbbing and his head started to pound as he walked, unsteadily, towards Jackie. When he reached her, he knelt back down in the mud and the thick grass, then he lifted Jackie's head off of the ground, setting it in his lap. For the second time in a matter of minutes Hyde found himself asking God for something. This time, it was for help.

He had no idea if the passer-by had called an ambulance. He had no idea if anyone was coming to help them. And for the first time in his life, Hyde wanted nothing more than to lay down in the grass, curl up next to Jackie and just give up.

'I killed him.'

He had nothing left in him. No strength, no hope, nothing but desperation. He stared down at Jackie's head in his lap and put his hand back on her gash. He was able to drown out the sound of Eric and Donna's cries and, in his mind, when he looked at Jackie she was awake - smiling as she looked at him over her shoulder, her lips parted, tempting him to kiss them.

"_Steven ..." she called out to him, with a grin spreading across her face._

"_Steven ..." her voice was more impatient this time._

_She tilted her head as if she couldn't understand why he wasn't coming to her. Her bottom lip stuck out in a wounded pout and she began to back away from him. Hyde watched, unable to stop her, as she moved further and further away from him. _

"_You can't give up on me, Steven. I need you, baby. I need you."_

_She was so far away now he could no longer make out her features. And as she blurred out of focus he heard her call to him again._

"_Do something, Steven. You've got to do something."_

Hyde shook his head and spoke out loud to no one, "What the hell am I doing?"

If he sat in the weeds feeling sorry for himself Jackie's fate would be the same as Kelso's. He had to get her out of here, and that meant getting help. If he called to Eric and Donna, they could go for help. He mentally slapped himself for his moment of weakness and he put all thoughts of guilt in the back of his mind. He'd deal with them later.

"Forman, over here!"

He didn't even recognize his own voice. It sounded so shaky and unsteady, not his usual detached and disinterested tone.

"Forman!" he called out again.

The moonless sky made it difficult to see ten feet in front of him but the headlights from the two vehicles gave some light and eventually, Hyde was able to spot Eric and Donna making their way down the hill towards the sound of Hyde's voice. He watched as Eric cupped his hands over his mouth and shouted, "Hyde?"

"Forman, you've gotta go for help! Now!"

Eric and Donna were finally close enough that Hyde could see the frantic expressions on their faces. Donna spotted Jackie and Hyde on the ground and immediately, she ran to join them.

"Oh my God! Jackie!"

Donna was running full speed now and when she reached Hyde she knelt down next to him. Hyde watched as Eric could only stop and stare at Jackie, his face frozen in complete shock. Donna started to sob as she grabbed at Jackie's arm, like she was trying to find a pulse. Eric made his way towards them. The combination of Donna's frenetic movements and Eric's lumbering crawl made Hyde's head spin. It was as if the world was moving in slow motion and super-sonic speed at the same time. Donna turned her gaze to Hyde and he could see the tears pouring down her face. He had never seen Donna cry.

Donna gasped and covered her quivering lips with her hand. She turned to Hyde to ask, "What happened? I don't understand what happened?"

Hyde didn't have an answer for her. He didn't know what had happened. He didn't know how, in a matter of minutes, he had gone from kissing Jackie in his driveway to kneeling over his friend's body.

Eric's voice came out, croaked and dry, "Where's Kelso?"

"Forman, I need you to listen to me. You have to go call an ambulance. Jackie needs to get to the hospital."

Realizing Hyde had avoided answering his question, Eric set out to find his own answers. Without waiting for another word from Hyde, Eric started looking around for any sign of Kelso. Hyde, knowing what Eric would find, tried to stop him.

"Forman, don't, man ..."

But it was as if Eric couldn't hear him, he started to wander, heading towards Kelso's van.

"Forman, we need to get an ambulance here!" Hyde shouted after him.

Hyde's voice faded away as Eric approached Kelso's van. He couldn't believe the damage that had been done to it. It was smashed and beaten like it was made of clay, instead of steel.

Eric knelt down next to the van and tried to look through one of the shattered windows, the shards of glass were still falling and Eric sliced his palm open as he leaned in for a closer look.

"Shit!" Eric pulled his hand back in pain and stood back up. He took off in a sprint back to Hyde and Donna. They needed to look for Kelso.

"Hyde, we've got to find Kelso. Donna can stay with Jackie."

"Forman," Hyde began, quietly. But Eric was gone again, weaving his way through the trees.

"Forman," he called out again as he laid Jackie's head down into Donna's waiting hands and stood up.

Hyde followed Eric, he watched as the skinny man tripped over branches and stumps, never slowing down in his pursuit of Kelso. Hyde felt the tightening come back to his chest. He couldn't watch Eric keep going like this. He couldn't let him keep hoping.

"Eric."

And just like that, hearing Hyde use his first name, Eric stopped. Hyde paused and glanced over to Donna who held onto Jackie and squinted in the darkness trying to see where Hyde and Eric had gone. Eric turned, painfully slowly, to face Hyde.

"It's too late."

Eric shook his head, over and over, completely in denial. "_No_. It's not too late, we have to find him, we have to help him."

He blew past Hyde and took off back towards Kelso's van. Donna watched her boyfriend run by her and then she looked to Hyde. Her face told him she needed an explanation, but instead of telling her anything Hyde simply knelt down in the grass next to her.

"Kelso? Kelso?" Eric called, futilely, into the air.

Donna and Hyde watched from their position at Jackie's side. Donna finally turned to Hyde and grabbed onto his tee shirt, pulling him towards her with a jerk.

"Where's Kelso, Hyde?"

Hyde just wanted it to be over. He couldn't watch his friends search blindly hoping to find Kelso. But before he could tell Donna where Kelso lay he heard Eric's broken cry.

"Oh, Jesus ... Kelso!"

Donna released Hyde's shirt and jumped up out of the grass, forgetting she held Jackie's head in her lap. Hyde lurched forward, catching Jackie before she clunked back down onto the ground. Donna began a sprint towards the sound of Eric's voice. Hyde watched as her pace slowed, and then stopped. He saw her shoulders hunch forward and her hands fly up to her face.

Hyde could hear her screaming, he could hear a sob coming out of her mouth. Eric's voice intertwined with Donna's and the two swirled together through the air and raced towards Hyde's brain, slamming against it.

He closed his eyes, trying to block out the sounds of his friends' screams. But, the second his eyes closed, Kelso's broken face appeared. Hyde opened his eyes back up, looked down at Jackie and gently moved her head out of his lap.

Without even thinking, he began heading towards Eric and Donna. His body moved against the will of his brain. In his mind, he knew that Eric and Donna would unleash their blame on him, he knew he should stay back, give them their space to cope. But he just couldn't.

Donna turned away from Kelso and threw herself into Eric's arms. Instead of clutching his girlfriend, Eric stood, numb, his hands dangling at his sides. Hyde continued his march towards his friends, though neither had yet noticed him approaching. He checked over his shoulder wondering how much longer Jackie could afford to go without medical help. For a moment, he considered running up the hill, away from it all in search of a phone. But that thought was interrupted by Donna's screams.

"Jesus, Hyde," she yelled out between sobs, "did you even bother to see if Kelso was still alive? Maybe you could've helped him."

Donna stood, staring at Hyde, waiting for an answer. Hyde opened his mouth to speak, and then shut it just as quickly. If he protested Donna's accusations he would have to tell them that he witnessed Kelso's final moments, and that was something he would never burden another soul with. In Hyde's mind it was better to let Eric and Donna think he was a monster than for them to know how much Kelso suffered before he died.

His plan worked and Eric and Donna were left to believe that Hyde was so callous, he had simply ignored Kelso in favor of taking care of Jackie. Hyde watched as Donna's face grew harder, and Eric's face seemed to age before his eyes.

"You didn't, did you," Eric whispered, stunned. Hyde just stared into the distance, his face blank and emotionless.

Eric shook his head at what he assumed to be Hyde's indifference. "You heartless son of a bitch."

Hyde could've told the truth, but it wouldn't have brought Kelso back, and it wouldn't heal Jackie. So, he took the insults and he took the hateful glares, because, in his mind, he deserved it. Everything was his fault and the fact that he had tried to save Kelso wouldn't change that.

Eric glared at Hyde with complete disgust and the guilt that Hyde had managed to shove into the deepest corners of his mind came out again, in full force.

'I killed him.' The thought ran through Hyde's mind, repeating itself, incessantly.

Eric felt as if he was stuck in limbo, he couldn't go up, he couldn't go down. He couldn't do anything but just exist. But Donna was headed towards Hyde before she even realized what she was doing. When she reached him, she looked into his eyes and waited for some sort of emotion to cross his face, something that would tell Donna he was feeling pain. But she saw nothing. Hyde had too many years of Zen under his belt to let Donna see anything resembling hurt. The anger inside Donna took over and she raised her hand to her friend's bruised face and slapped him as hard as she could.

Having Donna hit him didn't even phase Hyde. It was what he had coming. All of it. The hatred that spilled from Eric and Donna's eyes, the pain that now pulsed through his whole body, even Jackie's injuries. Maybe this was the universe's way of punishing Hyde. He had killed his friend, now Jackie was the price he had to pay.

He sunk deeper and deeper into the self-loathing that had taken a hold of him while he held onto Jackie. But this time, it wasn't Jackie that pulled him back from the edge - it was the sound of sirens.

He snapped to attention and looked up the hill towards the road. He could see the flashing lights and he heard the sound of cars. The loud wail of the ambulances was all it took to bring Hyde back. He turned his back on Donna and Eric as they began shouting for help. He started to run back to Jackie, but he'd never felt so uncoordinated in his life. It seemed like the connection between his feet and brain had been severed and it wasn't long before Hyde tripped on a piece of one of the cars and went down, hard. He broke his fall with his right arm and didn't even bother wasting time trying to stand up. He simply pushed himself up to his knees and shuffled his way through the grass, encountering rocks, sticks, glass, as he crawled towards Jackie. He had never been so sore in his life. Everything throbbed, all his muscles ached, his arm sent shocks through his body. But he kept going.

Behind him he could hear people coming down the hill and when he turned to look he could see two flashlights. One of the men spotted Eric and Donna waving at them and headed in their direction. The other paramedic was heading towards Jackie. Hyde pulled himself up using a tree and made it the last few steps just as the paramedic reached Jackie. The man set down a large medical bag and began working on Jackie with a dizzying speed.

"How long has she been out?" the paramedic asked Hyde with urgency.

"I don't know, I guess about fifteen minutes," Hyde answered as quickly as he could.

"Did you try and stop the bleeding?" the man looked at Hyde, waiting for an answer.

"Yeah, but obviously it didn't work very well, did it. Look, can we do the questions later, just help her, dammit!"

"Your arm looks like it's broken." The paramedic pointed to the useless limb hanging at Hyde's side.

"Yeah, well, her head's cracked open so she wins. Forget about my fucking arm."

"Did you keep her airway clear?"

Hyde couldn't believe what was happening. Jackie was laying on the ground, bleeding and this jackass was giving him a pop quiz on first aid.

"Look, I'm not a God damn doctor, I don't know what I did. Why are we still sitting here?"

"I'm waiting for someone to bring a backboard down," the man responded, "we have to be careful in case she has a neck injury. You didn't move her, did you?"

Hyde shook his head in disbelief, frustrated at the time that was being wasted. "What? Of course I moved her, do you think she levitated here?"

"Steven?"

As soon as he heard the barely audible whisper he crouched back down on the ground and leaned over Jackie. She was awake.

"Steven?"

"Yeah, doll, I'm right here." he answered her.

The paramedic moved himself closer to Jackie's head and took out a small pen light, shining it in her eyes as he pulled her lids up. Hyde tried to give the man room to work, without being too far away from Jackie. When the paramedic began examining Jackie's wound her eyes would flutter open and then close again and Hyde could tell she wasn't focusing on anything. In fact, it seemed she wasn't even really awake, more like dreaming.

"Steven?" It was the same question. He touched her face trying to carefully pick glass out of her perfect skin.

"Jackie ..."

"It's no use," the paramedic said, never stopping his examination, "she's just going to keep saying the same thing over and over again. She has no idea you're here, she has no idea she's here."

Hyde sat back on his heels letting that thought sink in. If Jackie had no idea what had taken place, that meant someone would have to tell her. And Hyde would have to be that someone. 'God,' he thought as he dropped his head to his chest, 'how do I tell her what happened?'

He didn't have any time to dwell on that question because in an instant two more paramedics were next to him, holding a long backboard. The older of the two shoved Hyde out of the way and all three began to work on Jackie.

The first paramedic looked to the others, "You need help with the other victim?"

One of the new paramedics shook his head. "Nope. D.O.A."

It sounded so callous to Hyde. They were describing his friend as if he were nothing. He was dead, so to them he no longer mattered. Everything he had been as a person no longer meant anything to these men.

The older of the new arrivals turned to Hyde while he continued his careful work on Jackie. "You look pretty beat up. You need anything?"

Hyde looked at the man, "Yeah. I need you to take care of her."

The paramedic nodded, understanding.

"Did you know the other victim?" the first paramedic asked.

Hyde could feel his fist clenching up like it automatically did when his blood began to boil. "The other victim," he said through pursed lips, "has a name. His name is Michael Kelso."

The paramedic looked somewhat taken aback at Hyde's tone. Hyde backed away and tried to calm himself by taking a deep breath, his temper had had enough of a workout today. Having finished strapping Jackie's tiny body down, the three men positioned themselves one on each side and one at Jackie's head as they prepared to lift her off the ground, and Hyde was forced to watch as three strangers carried his tiny and broken girlfriend up the side of a hill.

Hyde followed closely behind, slipping with almost every step and never noticing that several police officers were gathered around Eric, Donna and Kelso.

* * *

Jackie's stretcher smashed through the doors of the emergency room, pushed by two of the paramedics. Hyde followed closely behind, his arm now in a temporary sling. He watched as doctors and nurses walked towards them. The paramedics relayed Jackie's condition in words Hyde couldn't understand. Not because they were medical jargon, but because his brain had simply stopped processing. 

He followed, blindly, behind Jackie, staring as they parked her stretcher in a curtained room. His eyes left her for a moment as he scanned the ER looking for the only familiar face he would know - Mrs. Forman.

"You're going to have to wait outside."

He turned to the sound of the voice and saw a nurse standing in front of him, trying to shove him behind one of the curtains so she could close it. Hyde stood, unmoving, and shook his head.

"I can't leave her."

His words were not enough and the nurse continued to try and push him away.

"I'm sorry, but ..."

Hyde cut her off before she could give her bullshit reason. If asking nicely wouldn't get him anywhere, maybe lying would.

"I'm Kitty Forman's son, you've gotta let me stay."

The nurse looked at him, "Eric? You're Eric?"

'_Damn._'

Hyde hadn't counted on being called on his lie. What did he say, that he wasn't really Kitty's son but that she had raised him and watched over him and he lived in their house and ate their food and was treated the same as Laurie and Eric. Continuing to lie would be a hell of a lot faster.

"No. I'm Steven," he continued, quickly and pointed towards Jackie, "If she wakes up she's gonna be terrified."

The nurse looked Hyde up and down, her eyes finally resting on his arm. "Look," she sighed, "I'll call your mom and have her come down." Hyde nodded, waiting for the nurse to step aside, but she didn't move. "I'm going to get someone to take care of your arm, and we'll put you in the room right next-door to your girlfriend."

Hyde glanced over the nurse's shoulder at Jackie. She looked so small in the big bed, surrounded by machines and people in white. Next-door was better than nothing. He gave the nurse a nod and took a small step backwards. And with that, the curtain was pulled shut.

Jackie was out of his sight.

* * *

Eric watched as the various police officers surveyed the scene of the accident, photographing, measuring, taking notes - it all seemed too analytical, too simple. The man in charge - Detective Williams, was standing with Donna, questioning her. Eric couldn't focus on questions. His focus was devoted entirely to a white sheet on the ground under that covered his friend. 

If life were fair, Eric would wake up in his bed covered in Spider Man sheets. He'd shake his head, wondering what was in the pot he had smoked last night that caused such a freaky dream. Then, he would go downstairs to his basement to find Hyde sitting on the couch watching "Happy Days".

"_Man, you won't believe the messed up dream I had," _Eric would say.

Then Hyde would roll his eyes and call Eric a moron or some equally lame nickname and tell him he wasn't interested in another dream about Princess Leia. Minutes would pass in which the two did nothing but debate who was dorkier - Potsie or Ralph Malph. Eventually, Fez would shuffle in, his hands full of jelly beans and smelling like a mixture of the inside of a piñata and High Karate cologne. Donna and Jackie would follow. Jackie going on and on about how Donna needed to wear less flannel if she ever wanted to lead a productive life. Donna would call Jackie a Munchkin and tell her to return to Oz where her fellow Munchkins were surely missing her. Then, finally, Kelso would enter. His eyes would be wide and bugged-out because he had just seen a cat chasing a dog, which surely went against the laws of physics. They would all settle in on their respective chairs or seats. Maybe they'd have a pop, maybe a card game would start. The day would go on, and Eric would forget about his nightmare.

"_Eric!"_

It was Donna, staring at him, waiting for something. Detective Williams was furiously writing now, barely glancing up.

"Eric, he's talking to you."

"Sorry," Eric mumbled in response.

The detective finally looked at Eric. "I was asking about the fight in your driveway. How did it start?"

Eric tried to remember back that far, even though it had been less than an hour ago. It felt like something he had watched in a movie. "Um ... I don't know, it was just stupid."

Donna watched Eric babble and she cut in, too frustrated to wait for her boyfriend to narrate the evening's events in slow motion. "It was over a girl. That's why they started fighting."

"And the girl was Mr. Hyde's girlfriend?" Detective Williams asked.

"Yeah," Eric answered flatly. Ironic that it sounded like such a simple detail, when it had in fact, been the cause of everything. "Yeah, she's his girlfriend. Jackie Burkhart."

"Burkhart?" the cop looked up from his notes, obviously recognizing the name. "You mean Jack Burkhart's daughter?"

"Yeah," Eric agreed, not understanding where the cop was going with this.

"Isn't she like ... fifteen?"

Instantly, what the cop was asking clicked in Donna's mind. "She's sixteen." she answered, quickly.

Confirming Donna's suspicions were correct, the officer continued. "And this Hyde guy's eighteen?"

"He's eighteen." Eric nodded.

Detective Williams began writing, furiously in his pad. His questions continued, "Who instigated the fight? Mr. Hyde or Mr. Kelso?"

Eric wasn't sure who the question was directed at, but Donna answered before he did.

"Hyde. He started it."

Donna had never felt a lie so easily escape her lips. She didn't know why she did it, nor did she think about the repercussions for Hyde that her lie could cause. She just kept seeing Hyde's cold, detached stare before she slapped him and the words continued to pour out of her mouth.

"He just attacked Kelso, he wouldn't stop beating him," she continued all the while feeling Eric's eyes on her, "Kelso finally got away, he got in his van and he took off, but Hyde followed him."

Eric stared at Donna, too stunned to talk. He couldn't believe what was happening. His brain was shouting at him to stop it, to tell the truth. But his heart kept drawing him back to that sheet on the ground. So he stood silent. A reluctant accomplice.

"What about the girl? How did she get injured?"

Eric looked to Donna, wondering what she would say next.

"I don't know," Donna shook her head, "it must have happened in the accident. She was fine when she left."

Eric felt his stomach churning. In mere seconds Donna had managed to absolve Kelso, blame Hyde, and take away the incident that prompted Hyde's actions - Kelso hurting Jackie.

"Detective?" one of the other police officers shouted towards Detective Williams. He excused himself from Donna and Eric and started off towards the other officers.

Eric watched until the cop was out of earshot, then he turned to Donna and grabbed her by the wrist. "What are you doing?"

Donna let Eric's grasp keep her still for a few seconds. Then, as if his touch were burning her, she yanked her arm away from Eric. "What are you talking about?"

Eric let out a bitter laugh and stepped towards her again. "You're lying. That's not what happened, it was Kelso that started the whole thing."

Donna's eyes lit up and she pointed a finger in Eric's face. "Kelso may have thrown the first punch but it was Hyde that started this. He started this whole damn thing when he started _fucking_ Jackie." She sounded so hurt, so bitter and angry. She didn't sound like the girl Eric had known almost his whole life. "Besides, why does it matter who hit first? I think Kelso's paid his price, don't you."

The last question hit Eric hard. What she was saying started to make sense, it had been Hyde's fault. All of it. Hyde had chosen to get involved with Jackie, when he knew how things would turn out. Hyde had chosen to ignore Eric's repeated pleas to tell Kelso what was going on. Hyde had beaten Kelso, provoked or not. And who was Eric to punish Kelso. His friend's memory deserved more than that. His friend deserved some kind of justice.

Eric glanced back at Donna. She was so beautiful, even with blood and dirt on her face and tears running down her cheeks. She was the most important person in his life and he couldn't lose her. But he didn't want to lose Hyde either.

"No, Donna," Eric shook his head and looked right into Donna's eyes, praying he could get through to her, "I can't do it. I _won't _do it."

Instead of looking hurt or saddened by Eric's comments Donna only looked angrier. She crossed over to the sheet that had so distracted Eric and she yanked it off of Kelso.

"Tell Kelso you can't do it. Go on, Eric, tell him it's his fault."

Eric tried not to look, he knew if he looked at Kelso he would give in to Donna.

"C'mon, Eric. Tell him!"

She was egging him on, daring him to defy her, and he fell for it. His eyes traveled back to Kelso.

If life were fair, Eric wouldn't have to choose between Hyde and Kelso. But life wasn't fair and a choice had to be made.

Eric's thoughts were interrupted by two men walking down the hill towards he and Donna and Kelso. The men were carrying a stretcher as they wound their way down the hill. Donna backed up and a sob fell out of her mouth, like she had been hit in the gut. One of the men knelt down and tossed the white sheet back over Kelso's face.

Eric could feel his own tears building in his eyes and Donna grabbing his hand. She turned away from Kelso, unable to watch as he was attached to the stretcher. Eric wrapped his arms around his girlfriend as she sobbed. Her hair stuck to his wet face and she shook in his arms. The men lifted Kelso off the ground and headed away.

"Bye, man." Eric whispered as he watched his friend go.

He had made his choice.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed!!!! I really appreciate it!!! And a big thank you to luvcali for always being such a help, you are the best!!!!!!

I own nothing, just borrowing ;)

Some language in this chapter.

* * *

Chapter 4 

"Hello?"

"Hello?" Fez's voice rang out in the empty basement.

The frowning foreigner was sure his friends had either run off to do something fabulous without him, or, they were hiding somewhere waiting to come out and scare him, as they had done so many times before.

"If you sons of bitches are planning on jumping out and scaring me, just know I am not wearing any pants. So, the surprise will be on you." Fez smiled, triumphantly, sure that the thought of seeing him in his underoos would be enough to prevent a sneak attack.

"Ah, good one, Fez," he said, quietly to himself.

With nothing else to do, he sat down on the couch and picked up a magazine. Bored after mere seconds, he stood back up and headed towards Hyde's room, hoping to catch a little make out action between his angry friend and Jackie. Fez felt a little guilty that he was keeping Hyde and Jackie's relationship a secret from Kelso, but the enjoyment he was sure to get from hours of Jackie and Hyde's make out sessions in the basement eased his guilt considerably.

But all Fez found was the door to Hyde's small room left wide open and the dingy room empty. Fez frowned, not sure what made him sadder, missing a make out session or being excluded in whatever trouble his friends were up to at the moment. He would just have to try Eric's room. If he couldn't catch Eric in the act with Donna, perhaps he could catch him playing with his GI Joe's. A burn or a make out session - either one sounded good to Fez.

Fez made his way up the basement stairs and into the kitchen, the sound of the phone ringing stopped him from entering the living room. He waited for someone, anyone, to answer. When no one did, Fez picked up the phone. He was a firm believer that it was bad luck to leave a ringing phone unanswered.

'It could be a beautiful Tupperware saleswoman looking for a sexy foreign bastard to sell plastic pie holders to,' he reminded himself as he picked up the receiver.

"Yes? The house of Forman."

"Is Mr. Red Forman available?" the man on the other line asked.

"No. He is not." Fez replied, brusquely. He was about to hang up once he realized it was a not a sexy saleswoman, but the man continued talking.

"This is Officer Daniels from the Point Place Police Department. It's about his, um," the man paused and Fez could hear paper rustling, "is it his son? Steven Hyde?"

'Oh no. Hyde has been busted again,' Fez sighed, 'he should just let Jackie go to jail this time.'

But the officer interrupted Fez's vision of Jackie as a naughty inmate and continued, "Steven's been involved in a very serious accident."

It was as if someone had hit Fez with the phone. He stood, unmoving, and swayed slightly. He kept opening and closing his mouth, as if he wanted to speak but had suddenly forgotten how.

"We need Mr. Forman to meet us either at the station or at the hospital."

Upon hearing the words 'hospital' Fez let the phone slip out of his hands and he ran out the sliding door, forgetting in his panic to leave a note for Red.

* * *

Kitty Forman ran down the hospital hallways as fast as her short legs could carry her. As she neared the emergency room, she scanned every room she ran by for any sign of Eric. 

Recognizing one of the nurses, Kitty grabbed her by the arm and practically screamed at the girl, "Sheila, my son's been in an accident! What room have they put him in?"

The nurse paused for a minute, and then pointed to her right. "I think they've got him in Exam 3."

Not wasting a second, Kitty took off again towards the curtained room. She felt as if she were in one of those dreams were someone is chasing you and no matter how hard you try, you couldn't run fast enough to get away.

She went past closed curtain after closed curtain finally reaching the one she was looking for. Frantically, she yanked back the fabric barrier and stopped, frozen, when she saw Hyde and not Eric sitting on a bed, his arm being worked on.

"Steven?" Kitty rushed to her surrogate son's bedside and immediately began taking in his innumerous injuries. Hyde watched her eyes widen as she stared at each gash and bruise. The tears began to build up in Kitty's eyes and he looked away before he could see them pour down her face. She gently turned his face back to her and looked him in the eyes. "Oh my God," she sobbed, "Steven, what happened to you?"

Hyde swallowed and tried to think of a way to tell her what had taken place. But before he could start, Kitty began looking around the room, as if something was missing.

"Where's Eric? They told me Eric was here," her voice was reaching a panicked tone and Hyde interrupted her.

"No. It's me that had them call you. Eric's not here."

Kitty seemed momentarily confused, but then she gave Hyde the tiniest smile and grabbed onto his uninjured arm. "You told them I was your mother?"

"Mrs. Forman ..." he wanted to tell her what had happened before she gushed all over him and made his confession even harder.

"Oh, Steven, that is just the sweetest thing." Kitty's tears flowed faster now and Hyde tried, again, to tell her about the accident.

"Mrs. Forman, Jackie and I," again he was interrupted.

"Jackie's here? Is she hurt?"

Hyde nodded, slowly, "Yeah. She's next-door and they wouldn't let me stay with her."

Kitty gave Hyde a quick kiss on the cheek and then she turned and headed quickly for Jackie's room. But Hyde's voice stopped her.

"Mrs. Forman, wait," he paused and she looked at him with a cross between confusion and sympathy. "I need to tell you what happened."

"Steven, I'll be right back. Just let me check on Jackie and then ..."

Hyde cut her off before she could finish her thoughts, "No. Because I want you to hear it from me."

Kitty looked at her battered boy and suddenly realized how serious his uncovered eyes were. She took a small step closer to him, and she waited.

Hyde drew in a breath so large it felt like he had sucked all the oxygen out of the room. He was terrified to tell Mrs. Forman, and he was a man that wasn't scared of anything. If he told her, he was sure she would finally see him for the asshole he was, and not the good person she wanted him to be. But he wanted her to hear about Kelso from him, and not some doctor.

Hyde had two women in his life who loved him, and he had to tell them both that he had killed his best friend.

* * *

Eric and Donna pulled into the parking lot of the hospital and just sat in the car. Unsure where to go next. They couldn't talk to each other, they couldn't even look at each other. Neither wanted to admit what they had done, but neither had the courage to make it right. So they sat. 

"We have to call Fez," Eric said, quietly.

Donna nodded in agreement as she turned to look at Eric. His expression was blank, unreadable. And to Donna, he almost looked like Hyde. He looked Zen.

Though he could feel her eyes on him, Eric never looked at Donna. He couldn't let her see that what they had done was eating him alive inside. He wanted her to feel he was on her side. He wanted her to feel like he was strong, that he wouldn't waiver from their choice.

Eventually, she looked away.

Donna wondered if Eric was regretting their decision as she was. But if he was, he didn't show it. She opened her mouth to ask him, but found she couldn't form a sentence. So she just told herself they had done the right thing, the only thing. They couldn't let Hyde get away with what he had done. He would have to pay. Kelso deserved that much.

When the silence began to echo louder than thunder, Eric opened the car door and stepped out. He didn't wait for Donna, he just headed towards the emergency room where he was sure he would find Jackie and Hyde.

Donna waited for Eric to come to her door like usual. But he never did. So, she got out of the car and headed off behind him wishing he would at least look back towards her. She just wanted some sort of sign that they would get through this together. Her mind was telling her to yell Eric's name, to run to him. Yet, she held back and followed ten feet behind him as they entered the hospital.

Donna had never felt so far away from Eric in her life.

* * *

"So, she's gonna be okay?" Hyde asked Kitty from his chair at Jackie's bedside. 

Kitty nodded, reassuringly, and she smiled at Hyde. "She's going to be fine, sweetie. She just has a very mild concussion. And the cuts will heal. The doctor that did the stitches was so careful."

Hyde looked back to Jackie, her eyes still closed. "Shouldn't she be awake by now?"

"She's been through a lot, her body is just trying to recover."

Hyde nodded, trying to resist the urge to jump up and start punching holes in the walls. Kitty had taken the news with amazing calmness and she had reassured Hyde over and over of everything - that Jackie would be fine, that the accident was just that, an accident, and most importantly, that she still loved Hyde. Hyde knew she meant every word of it. But that didn't mean he was ready to let himself off the hook.

Looking down at Jackie, Hyde rubbed a finger along her battered cheek. Kitty was stunned at the gesture, and the ease with which Hyde performed it. She hadn't realized how much Jackie actually meant to him, and she was pretty sure he hadn't realized it, either.

When he finally spoke, Hyde's voice was deep and quiet. "She's gonna be so upset about her face."

Kitty crossed around the bed to stand behind Hyde and simply laid her hands on his shoulders, trying desperately to give him some kind of comfort, _any_ kind of comfort.

She watched as Hyde's shoulders dropped and he leaned forward resting his head in his hands. Kitty couldn't tell if it was relief or the emotion of the accident finally hitting him. The image of her tough and cynical boy looking so hopeless was enough to start Kitty's tears back up.

Wanting so badly to offer him some comfort, Kitty knelt down next to Hyde's chair and wrapped her arms around him. She was shocked when instead of sitting like a limp doll, Hyde returned her embrace. She held onto him and stroked his back, like only a mother could. He seemed to relax more and more with each second Kitty held him, until finally he pulled back. Clearing his throat, she watched his face go blank again and Kitty knew he had withdrawn back into himself.

"This is my fault."

He said it so simply, so matter-of-fact. Like he was talking about the weather.

Kitty shook her head, going instantly into her protective mother mode. "Steven, you listen to me, this is not your fault."

"It is." Hyde nodded. No one was going to convince him it wasn't.

Kitty grabbed his face and forced him to look her in the eyes, not caring that he winced as she pressed on his battered jaw and cheeks. "Steven Hyde, you need to stop this. Now."

Never before had Hyde seen Kitty look so serious. Her eyes were wide and she held onto him so tight he felt like his face was in a vice.

"If you blame yourself for this it will eat away at you until it destroys you. And I will not let you do that to yourself."

"Who should I blame, then? Jackie? Kelso?" His voice was getting agitated and he struggled, to no avail, against Kitty's grip.

"You can't blame anyone. This was an _accident_. A horrible, horrible accident. Don't let it cost you your life like it cost Michael his."

Kitty watched as Hyde's eyes dropped and she could tell he was thinking about what she said. She loosened her grip just slightly and his eyes immediately returned to hers.

"I should've just pulled over, I should've -"

"Well, you can't," she stated, harshly. It wasn't Kitty's nature to be hard or insensitive, but she feared nothing else would get through to Hyde. "You can't go back, all you can do is go forward."

She finally released his face and he pulled back, rubbing his bruised jaw. soon as he was set free, Hyde got up off the chair and paced for a few seconds, looking like a caged animal trying to plot his escape. And then, without a word, he headed for the door. Kitty stood up and watched as he headed away from her.

"Where are you going, Steven?"

"I've gotta get out of here."

In Hyde's mind, the room had faded away, Jackie had faded away, Kitty had faded away. The only thing he focused on was the door. He had to get away.

But Kitty was faster than he was and she made it to the door before he did, putting her small body between Hyde and the exit he craved so fiercely.

"You're not going anywhere." Kitty planted her feet firmly in the ground to show Hyde just how serious she was.

"Mrs. Forman, please ..."

But Kitty cut him off, "Where are you going to go, huh?"

Hyde shook his head and the only thought that came to mind was, 'somewhere I can forget.' Somewhere he could drink and get high and waste away without hurting anyone else. People had thought he was worthless his whole life, he might as well prove them right.

"I ... I don't know," was all he managed to get out.

"What I am going to tell Jackie when she wakes up?"

Hyde let his eyes briefly return to Jackie. He looked away, before he was somehow magnetically drawn back to her. "Tell her to forget about me. Tell her I'm sorry about everything. Tell her," Hyde paused, "she doesn't need me in her life. I'll only drag her down with me."

Realizing she was going to have to go a little crazy, Kitty grabbed Steven's good arm and dragged him back to Jackie's bed.

"You're going to leave her like this? You're going to walk out of this room and let her wake up alone? You're going to leave her like your mother and father left you?"

Kitty knew the last question would sting, but she had to get through to him anyway she could. Hyde shook his head and tried to turn away, but Kitty turned him back around to face Jackie. "Steven, this girl needs you and I know you need her. I know you think what happened is your fault, but you cannot think that way."

Grabbing Hyde by the shoulders, Kitty turned him towards her so that they were face to face. In his eyes she could see she almost had him. He was so close to believing that Kitty still loved him, that she didn't blame him, that _Jackie _wouldn't blame him.

"You need to forgive yourself, Steven." Kitty felt like she couldn't emphasize her words enough. If she had a megaphone she would have shouted the words at Hyde. "You need to forgive yourself, Steven."

He had been so unloved for so many years, it was almost impossible for him to believe he deserved anything resembling affection. But the Formans had given it to him, and so had Jackie. They had given him a life he thought he was never meant to have - a good life. If he left Jackie and the Formans, he would throw it all away. Leaving was the coward's way out and it would make Hyde no better than Bud or Edna.

Hyde had been left so many times. Jackie had been left so many times. He didn't want to be just one more leaver in either of their lives.

So he simply let out a loud and shaky sigh and he sunk down onto Jackie's bed as if she was an anchor attached to his feet, pulling him down to her.

Kitty watched as he finally gave in, finally released some of his guilt. She knew most of it would linger, but he had shed enough of it to stay. And that was all she wanted.

* * *

Detective Williams headed towards his desk, not at all looking forward to the phone call he had to make. He had been left the task of informing Jack Burkhart of his daughter's condition. That is, if he could ever find him. Detective Williams had tried for hours to track the injured girl's father down, but had so far had no luck. He managed to get a hold of a housekeeper, who barely spoke English and kept saying, "Mr. Jack not here." 

Pamela Burkhart was apparently unavailable as well, and the exhausted and frustrated cop was starting to wonder who in the hell took care of their daughter on a daily basis. Someone had finally managed to get a hold of Mr. Burkhart's secretary, and she, in turn, had provided a phone number to a hotel room in St. Louis. So, with not much hope he could get an answer, Detective Williams dialed the number.

He let it ring ten times and then grabbed the piece of paper the number was written on, crumpling it in his hands. It was another dead end.

As he took the phone away from his ear and started to hang up, he heard a groggy voice on the other end.

"What?"

Immediately, Detective Williams brought the phone back up to his ear. "Jack Burkhart?"

"Yes. And do you have any idea what time it is?" Jack responded, angrily.

The detective ignored Jack's hostility and kept going. "Sir, I'm afraid it's about your daughter," he paused for a moment and waited for the usual cry of concern. When none came, he continued, "I'm afraid she's been in an accident."

Again, the usual barrage of questions that Detective Williams normally got when he placed this kind of call did not come. Instead, in a detached voice, Jack simply asked, "What happened to her?"

"She's going to be fine, but she has a head injury and she's pretty banged up."

"I see," Jack continued, as if they were talking about the weather and not his only child. "What were the circumstances surrounding the accident.

"Well, it looks like your daughter and her boyfriend ..."

"Boyfriend? What does that idiot have to do with this?" It was the first time Detective Williams had heard any actual emotion coming out of Jack Burkart's voice.

"Her boyfriend, Steven Hyde, was driving and it looks like they were in pursuit of another vehicle and Mr. Hyde lost control of the car and they had a pretty big crash."

"Steven Hyde?" Jack asked, not trying to hide the bitterness in his voice, "That's not my daughter's boyfriend. Her boyfriend's name is Michael Kelso."

Detective Williams began searching for a pen to write with. He had been skeptical about the story of the two boys getting into such an out-of-control fight over a girl, but now it appeared it was true.

"Michael Kelso was also involved in the accident," he hesitated, briefly, "I'm afraid he was killed."

Jack Burkhart didn't flinch at the mention of Kelso's death. He kept going, his mind on one track. "Who the hell is Steven Hyde? Is he related to that no-good Bud Hyde?"

"According to his record Bud Hyde is his father," Detective Williams answered.

"The kid has a record?" Finally, it appeared as if something had gotten Jack Burkhart interested in the phone call. The fact that his daughter had almost been killed apparently wasn't enough to get the man worked up. But the fact that she was dating someone with a criminal record was. "What kind of a record?"

The detective cleared his throat, nervously, "I'm not really ..."

His sentence was interrupted by the angry voice of the man on the other line, "Now you listen to me. Do you know who I am? I'll have you fired faster than you can hang up this phone. Now, I want you to tell me what's in this punk's record."

"Possession of marijuana. A couple shoplifting things, speeding tickets, underage drinking" he quickly scanned the papers in Hyde's file and then added, "but that was all a few years ago. It looks like he's managed to stay out of trouble for the past year."

"How old is this kid?" Jack asked, not bothering to hide the disadin in his voice.

Detective William didn't have to look at his papers for the answer. "He's eighteen."

"Are you aware that Jacqueline is only sixteen years old?"

The cop cleared his throat again, "Yes, sir. I am aware of that."

There was a brief pause and for a few seconds, Detective Williams wondered if Jack Burkhart had hung up.

"Put the Chief on the phone."

The detective rolled his eyes and tossed the crumpled up paper he had been clutching. Without even a word, he pressed the hold button on his phone and stood up from his desk. He was glad to be rid of the patronizing man. Even if it meant his boss coming down on him for not kissing some rich politician's ass.

As he walked to his boss' office he knew what was going to happen. Jack Burkhart would manage to convince the Chief to charge Steven Hyde with anything and everything they could.

He muttered silently as he knocked on the Chief of Police's door. "That kid pissed off the wrong guy."

* * *

Her eyelids felt so heavy. Too heavy for her to even open them. And her head, her head felt like someone was pounding it with a hammer. But off in the distance of her swirling mind, she could hear a voice. Someone was whispering her name. 

"Jackie."

Whose voice was that? And why couldn't she open her god damn eyes.

"Jackie. Please open your eyes, doll."

Something seemed to be pulling her under a warm blanket of darkness. She wanted to sleep. Why wouldn't the voice let her sleep.

"Jackie."

The voice was getting louder now. The voice wasn't going to leave her alone until she opened her eyes. Maybe if she just opened them for a minute the voice would go away. With every muscle in her body, she tried to lift her eyelids. Her lashes fluttered and then her eyes popped open. Nothing was in focus. It was too bright and everything was fuzzy. She tried to concentrate on the blur that sat directly in front of her, but it just made her head pound harder. Her face felt wet, was she crying? She felt a hand touch her face and wipe the tear away. The hand was rough, but it was so warm and tender. She didn't want the hand to leave her face. And then, it hit her.

'_Steven.'_

It was Steven's hand.

"Steven?"

He never would've thought there would be a day when he prayed to hear her voice.

"Hey," was the only thing he could bring himself to say. He didn't know what she'd remember and he really didn't know how he was gonna explain to her what she forgot. So he chose to say as little as possible. There would be nothing but questions soon enough.

"What ... where am I?" She blinked again, trying to adjust to the harsh light. "And wherever I am, do they have aspirin?"

Hyde cracked a tiny smile and sighed. She must be doing a little better if she was already complaining.

"You're in the hospital."

It was only then that Jackie's eyes finally began to focus and she was able to see Steven's face. He looked so tired. And there was another expression that she didn't recognize. Was it fear? He had cuts, tiny and very fresh looking cuts all over his face. When she reached up to stroke his face he winced. She pulled her hand back, quickly, having no idea what she'd done wrong.

"Yeah, um. I ... if the beard wasn't there," he sighed, frustrated in his apparent inability to just open his mouth and talk, "if the beard wasn't there you'd get a nice look at the giant bruise on my jaw."

"Bruise? What happened to you?" She finally noticed the cast wrapped and sling around his left arm and Hyde watched as she let her hand fall into her lap and shake her head. She had no idea what had happened to them.

"Steven, what's going on?"

He knew that he had to tell her something. But where he was supposed to start was a total mystery. The best strategy seemed to be trying to find out if she remembered something._ Anything._ It would be one less thing to have to tell her. One less thing that would hurt her.

"Jackie, do you know what day it is?"

She tried to think, but there was that pounding again, so she just gave up and shook her head as slowly as she could so as not to awake whatever monster was dancing in her skull.

"We were in my driveway last night ..."

"Steven," she cut him off, "we're in your driveway every night."

He nodded his head in agreement, grateful for his three second reprieve. Then he took a deep breath.

"I know we are. But we ... we were making out."

He almost grinned at the way she rolled her eyes, clearly displeased with Hyde. "We do that every night, too."

Leaning in closer, Hyde swallowed, trying like hell to get the words out. "Jackie, we ... Kelso saw us."

There. The first part was over. Too bad it was the easiest part.

The corners of Jackie's perfect mouth turned down at the edges and then she quickly pulled them back when she realized it hurt like hell. She reached up to touch her face and for the first time felt her split open lip and the two stitches that held it into place. A look of panic washed over her face. Hyde watched as her expression flip-flopped back and forth between confusion and fear.

"What's wrong with my face?"

She was trying so hard not to cry. But he could see it wasn't going to work as her eyes quickly filled up with more tears than her lashes could hold back. One blink, sent the tears dripping down her cheeks in lines and Hyde shook his head to try and erase the memory of blood running down the same cheeks.

With the best grin he could muster, Hyde rubbed his thumb over her lip. Without even thinking about it, Jackie reached up and grabbed for his hand, pulling it into hers. "You had a couple of stitches, but they're gonna heal. Mrs. Forman promised me the doctor was a miracle worker."

Suddenly, Jackie felt the need to explore every inch of her face. Letting go of Hyde's hand, she lifted first one and then the other hand to her face. There was a large bandage on her forehead, and if she pressed just slightly, she could feel the stitches underneath the cloth. There were so many stitches. She let her hands roam further and she felt her own tiny cuts. Although she couldn't see them, she knew they looked like Hyde's. She let her eyes focus on her hands. There they were. Little slices in her skin, and just like Hyde's they felt brand new.

"What is going on here? What happened to us?"

The desperate tone in her voice there Hyde was no more time. He had to let it all out now, before she started to panic and the sound of her voice brought doctors running.

"We were in the driveway, and Kelso saw us -"

Jackie interrupted him, not wanting to be told the same thing she had heard only seconds before. "Steven! Tell me something besides that."

"Baby, you've gotta be quiet. Otherwise they're gonna know you're awake and the doctors are gonna come in here." He needed to tell her what happened before some stranger could do it. Maybe if it came from him it wouldn't hurt quite as much.

"He flipped out, Jackie. And he, he punched me."

She gasped and immediately her small hand was on his face, gently caressing his beard. "Oh, Steven, are you okay?"

He couldn't believe that even though she was laying in a hospital bed covered in injuries that she had no clue about, she wanted to know if he was alright.

"Yeah," he stated simply, "yeah. I'm fine." Some of the concern seemed to leave her face and so Hyde continued. "I hit him back, Jackie."

"Well, God, I hope so." she sniffed and wiped her face, her tears momentarily dried up.

"And then, then he hit me back. Only he missed." She tilted her head in that way that drove him crazy because it either made him want to scream at her or kiss her. The tilt could mean so many things, but this tilt meant she was confused.

He wasn't sure if he wanted her to remember what happened next. Part of him did. The part of him that selfishly didn't want to have to tell her himself.

"And he hit you instead."

Knowing if he took too long of a pause he'd never get the rest out, Hyde kept going, trying not to notice her tears had reappeared.

"Everything got out of control so fast. I couldn't stop it." He grabbed her perfect face as gently as he could and he kissed her softly on the forehead. But he couldn't stop now. "You fell face first onto the curb and you hit your head. Hard."

Jackie reached up and again touched the bandage on her forehead. "Here?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah. And you got knocked out," Hyde stopped, the image of Jackie laying on the ground replayed over and over in his mind, "and there was blood everywhere. Donna, she tried to get you to stop bleeding."

Jackie interrupted, "Donna was there?"

He nodded. "Forman was there, too." The thought of Eric trying to help her brought another tiny smile to Jackie's face. It should've made Hyde happy to see her smile. But it only broke his heart more, because the smile would be gone too soon and he didn't know when it would come back.

"Jackie, when I saw you like that, I ... I lost it."

"You did?"

He knew what she thinking. A scene straight out of a Harlequin romance novel was dancing in her head; the white knight protecting his damsel in distress. The truth, however, was nothing she could have dreamed up in her innocent mind.

"I went after Kelso. And I really kicked the crap out of him, Jackie. I didn't mean to, but I did. I just kept seeing you laying in the street and I ..."

"Steven ..."

"Jackie, you've gotta let me finish 'cause I don't know how much longer we have before somebody comes in to check on you."

It was then that Jackie realized his face had gone white and his eyes were an ice blue. They didn't dance with mischief like they always seemed to. They looked ... lost.

'Say it as fast as you can, Hyde.'he thought to himself._ '_It won't hurt as much if you say it fast.'

"I put you in the car and I just wanted to get you here. Forman and Donna, they ... they. Fuck," he swore as quietly as he could. She was wide-eyed now, knowing something wasn't right.

"They stayed with Kelso and you and I took off. I don't know how long we were driving before I realized someone was following us. Chasing us."

He chose the word chasing for a reason and she knew it. "Who was chasing us, Steven?" she whispered, even though she already knew the answer.

"Kelso."

'There. Now tell her the rest.'

The words tumbled out of Hyde's mouth and Jackie looked lost trying to keep up with his narrative. "Kelso was chasing us. And I just wanted to get you to the God damn hospital. But he wouldn't back off, he was screaming at me through his window. He was fucking nuts. And I know I was driving too fast, but I just wanted to get away from him. And then, he hit us."

"Steven?" It sounded like she was urging him to continue and begging him to stop at the same time.

"He hit us and I lost control of the car, Jackie. We spun out and the car, I don't know what happened ... we were on the road and then we were in the fuckin' forest."

Her face. His face. The cuts. A car accident. Her head pounded as she tried to wrap her brain around it.

"There was fuckin' glass everywhere. I didn't know what the hell was going on. And then ..."

He stopped, he just couldn't tell her the rest.

"Then what?" still, he said nothing. "Then what, Steven?" she asked, again, louder this time.

"Then I saw Kelso's van coming down the hill behind us. It was flipping. It kept on flipping and it wouldn't stop. I was trying to get you out of the car because I couldn't see where Kelso's van was going. I thought it was gonna roll right into us and I had to get you out of the god damn car."

"Steven, it's okay." She grabbed his hand and interlaced her fingers with his, trying to soothe him. "We're okay. You got me out."

Hyde looked up at Jackie and realized she thought he was done with his story. He tried to continue, "Jackie ..." he pulled his hand out of hers and then began rubbing his eyes, roughly. His head began to pound and he felt like he was back in the El Camino slamming against the glass.

"Steven, what aren't you telling me?"

He brought his hands back down and placed them both on her. "I pulled you out of the car and then I ran over to Kelso." he swallowed, trying to forget what he saw.

There was only one thing left to tell her. One thing and then a part of her would never be the same.

"Jackie. Kelso died."

* * *


	5. Chapter 5

First of all, thank you so much to those of you who left your reviews. It really means a lot to me to know there are people enjoying this story. Especially since there seem to be some people who feel it necessary to bash this story. And to those of you who don't agree with my story, leaving nasty, anonymous reviews is a little pointless. I'm always willing to hear advice or helpful criticism. But nastiness is not helpful, it's just rude. Kitty would be very disappointed in you. And that's all I'm going to say about that.

Thanks and margaritas with you-know-who go out to luvcali who's always willing to help. And thank you to a very friendly and knowledgeable police officer who gave me some technical help.

I own nothing, and there are a few naughty words in this chapter. Don't say I didn't warn you.

* * *

_1977_

_Point Place, Wisconsin_

"_Ooh, Michael, let's go swing," Jackie cooed at her boyfriend as he performed pull-ups on the monkey bars._

"_But, Jackie, I'm showing off here. Aren't you the least bit impressed that I can do ten pull-ups?" Kelso asked with an injured look on his handsome face._

_Realizing that some begging and guilt were going to be necessary if she wanted her way, Jackie stuck out her bottom lip as far as it could go and then she batted her eyelashes furiously. "Pweeeease?"_

_Her trick worked as Kelso let out an exasperated sigh, signaling his surrender. "Fine." Letting go of the bar, he crashed onto the gravel beneath and took off in a jog towards the swings. Turning back briefly, he yelled at his girlfriend over his shoulder, "But I get to give you an underdog!"_

_With an irritated look, that was really a _fake_ irritated look, Jackie headed towards the swings and climbed on. _

_Kelso's lanky and seemingly endless legs bent back and forth with furious speed. In no time at all he had succeeded in swinging so high Jackie feared the old swing set might collapse under the force. But Jackie was struggling to get her swing going. As much as she hated her boyfriend's infamous underdogs, at least they gave her a little height._

"_Go higher, Jackie!" Kelso yelled as Jackie pumped her short legs as hard as she could._

"_This is as high as I go, Michael."_

_At the pinnacle of his upward swing, Kelso jumped out of his rubber seat, landing on his feet like some kind of crazy cat. Jackie stopped pumping and drug her feet in the dirt to stop herself, wondering what her crazy boyfriend was up to._

_With a knowing grin and a purposeful stride, Kelso headed towards Jackie. Effortlessly, he lifted Jackie out of her swing and wrapped her legs around his waist. Jackie squealed in delight and gave him a quick peck on the lips, clearly pleased with his gesture. Still holding onto Jackie, Kelso sat himself down in her swing and then started to pump with Jackie clinging on for dear life._

"_How high you wanna go?" _

"_Really, really high, Michael!"_

_With his trademark mouth-agape grin, Kelso threw his whole body into his movements and drove he and Jackie up into the air. The sound of Jackie's giggles and screams rang out through the deserted park. Kisses to his cheek and neck were Kelso's reward for sending them through the stratosphere as he pumped the crickety swing higher and higher ... _

Jackie sat frozen in her hospital bed, unable to lose the feeling of that day. She had been so in love with Kelso, and she felt so free - as if she were flying. But now, her flight had ended and she came crashing back to earth. He was dead. The word was so sickening, even just to think. The finality of it was too much.

Hyde's eyes never left Jackie as he watched her face displaying only one emotion. Guilt. He watched her beautiful and battered features contort as realization set in.

"Because of me. He died because of _me_," Jackie whispered, unable to find her voice.

Pictures of Kelso wouldn't stop flooding her mind. There were so many memories, so many words and countless images and no matter how tightly Jackie squeezed her eyes shut, they wouldn't stop. They came one after another until Jackie prayed for the darkness she had just woken from to return.

From within some inner chamber of her body, Jackie began to shake. And then, the nausea hit her. She flung her legs over the side of her bed and took off in the direction of the bathroom. The pain that shot through her arm as she tore out her IV made her scream and Hyde watched as her weak legs gave out underneath her and sent her crashing to the floor only seconds after she had stood up. Instead of trying to stand back up, Jackie simply laid down on the floor and began to sob.

Hyde was frozen. There was nothing in his brain that could tell him what to do to help Jackie. It was easier when she had been bleeding and unconscious. _That_ he knew how to help. But _this_, the sobbing and the shaking and her gasps for breath - _this_ was something he couldn't fix. So he just stood and watched her cry; telling himself that anything he said or did would be inadequate, anyway.

Slowly, Jackie began to push her upper body off the floor. Her eyes were already bloodshot and Hyde watched as tears dripped down her cheeks over the gashes caused by glass from _his_ car. As if the guilt Jackie felt was contagious, Hyde soon found a fresh wave of it hitting him. His car, his fault, his stupidity - they were the reasons that Kelso was dead. The self-loathing that he had managed to tuck away to some unused part of his mind began to resurface.

More than anything, Hyde wanted to run, to get the hell out of Jackie's godforsaken hospital room as fast as possible. If he were a man like Eric, a _better_ man, he could say something to help her. But that wasn't him, so why pretend. Why give her hope that he could be what she needed. She'd probably end up hating him for what he'd done to Kelso anyway, maybe not now but eventually she would. If he left her now, it would be easier for both of them.

And then, she turned her eyes up to him. He knew that look in her eyes, the look that begged him to make everything better. Usually, that look gave him some weird sense of comfort, because it meant that she believed in him - even if no one else in the world did. But this time, the look made him angry. Why did it always have to be him that fixed her problems. Didn't she understand that this time, there was nothing he could do. He was not _that guy._

But Jackie wouldn't look away from Hyde, not even for a second. And there was nowhere he could run. They stared at each other, unflinching and unmoving until Jackie raised her hand to wipe the tears that had collected on her face. As she did, her hand caught Hyde's eye. There was blood dripping down her arm from where her IV had been ripped out. And before Hyde could stop it, the fiercely protective side of him that seemed to only surface when Jackie provoked it, came out. He headed into the bathroom, tossing things aside until he found some gauze. It took him only seconds to return to her, and he pressed the cloth to her hand trying again to stop her from bleeding.

As soon as Jackie was aware of Hyde's body next to hers, she climbed into his lap like a child who had skinned her knee and wanted someone to make it better. It occurred to Hyde, that maybe Jackie didn't need any words, or heartfelt speeches. Maybe she just needed _him_. But again, he pushed that thought away. He wasn't what she needed.

"I'm gonna go find Mrs. Forman," was all he could think to say.

"_No_!" she practically screamed at him as she gripped onto his shirt. "No, Steven, don't leave me."

Not saying another word, Hyde merely sat, and let her hold onto him. With each passing second, Hyde felt more and more convinced that he had to leave Jackie. This would always be what she needed - someone to save her. And he was positive that he was not the one would could do the saving. Not when he felt as lost as he did.

"It's my fault," Jackie uttered against Hyde's chest.

Hyde shook his head, knowing that if anyone were to blame, it was him. He should have anticipated Kelso's reaction when he learned of the relationship between himself and Jackie. "I should've pulled over and talked to him. I just, I had to get you here. I thought you were gonna bleed to death."

Jackie lifted up her head to look at Hyde her eyes wide with grief, "So it's not alright for me to blame myself, but it's okay for you to do it?"

"Jackie, none of this is because of you. Tell me you know that." It was a stupid thing to say, because Hyde knew Jackie still didn't believe him, and he couldn't blame her. The guilt in his own mind was suffocating and he could only imagine the guilt that Jackie was inflicting upon herself.

His thoughts interrupted, Hyde watched as a sob stuck in Jackie's throat and for a moment, it looked like she couldn't breathe.

"He can't be dead." she shook her head over and over and looked as if she might die from the pain of it all.

In Hyde's mind, he was sure that Jackie had suddenly wished she had never left Kelso. Maybe she was even wishing that it was Hyde that had died, instead. He had meant nothing to Jackie, and now he would only be a mistake that she regretted for the rest of her life. A mistake that had cost her the person she truly loved.

Knowing that now was the moment he had to leave, Hyde rose off the ground, and gently helped Jackie stand back up. Her legs seemed to be made of Jell-O and they were unable to carry her back to her bed. Instinctively, Hyde lifted her up and did the work for her. Not letting himself feel the warmth of her arms wrapped around him, Hyde set Jackie down in her bed and began to back away from her. Instead of vocalizing her thanks, Jackie gazed up at Hyde with that same look of adoration he had seen so many times. The look was temporary, he was sure of it.

But then, she did something that took Hyde by surprise - she reached out for him. Years of not allowing himself to need people kicked in, and Hyde quickly turned away from his girlfriend's outstretched arm. Choosing instead to head towards the bathroom. He mumbled, lamely, as he went, "I, uh ... I better find some tape to wrap up that gauze with."

When Jackie didn't respond, he looked back quickly, then turned away even faster, pretending he didn't see the look of hurt etched across Jackie's cut-up face.

'See,' his inner demons taunted him. 'You'll _never_ be that guy.'

* * *

Red Forman heard the phone ringing as he opened the sliding door to his house. "I'm coming, dammit," he grumbled at the inanimate object. Why was it that as soon he got home from work, there was always someone or something around to bug him? 

He yanked the phone off of its' receiver and barked into it, "What?"

"Oh, Red, thank God," he heard his wife sigh.

"Kitty, I just walked in the door. Whatever it is, it can wait."

"No, Red. It can't"

Understanding the difference between when his wife was just being dramatic and when something was seriously wrong, Red paused and waited for her to continue.

Confirming his beliefs, Kitty began to cry on the other line. "It's Steven."

At the mention of Hyde's name, Red spoke up, "What about Steven?"

Kitty continued to try and talk through her tears, "He was in an accident."

The news hit Red harder than Kitty could have known, and he was tempted to just drop the phone and make his way to the hospital when Kitty began to speak again, "He broke his arm, and he's pretty cut up, but he's going to be okay."

Letting out an audible sigh, Red began hammering Kitty with questions. "What the hell was he doing? Dammit, I've told those idiots not to drive so fast ..."

"No, Red," how in the world did she explain what had taken place,"there's more. Michael and Steven got into a fight over Jackie and, there was ..."

"A fight? Well, how badly did Steven beat up the moron?" Red sighed in irritation.

Suddenly, Kitty's sobbing ceased while her voice grew quiet and Red had to strain to be able to hear her.

"Jackie was hurt, Red, pretty badly. And Steven was bringing her here when Michael,"she hesitated, "Michael went after them..."

It was a statement that didn't surprise Red. He knew Kelso wasn't usually one to think his actions through. "Tell Steven to take care of Jackie and then get his ass home. I want to have a word with him about the meaning of the words, 'parole violation'," Red finished with an irritated tone.

"Will you just let me finish!" Kitty yelled into the phone.

Stunned by his wife's harshness Red shut his mouth and listened for Kitty to continue.

"Michael was out of control, and he started ramming Steven's car, and, oh Red, they all went into the ditch." Kitty stopped unable to get the words to form.

"Kitty, what's going on?" Red demanded, not so patiently.

"Red, Michael died."

The silence on the other line was interminable to Kitty. Red always knew what to do, in any situation and Kitty needed him to come to the hospital and be with Hyde, and she needed him to be with Eric, whenever it was that he would arrive. As strong as Kitty was, she didn't think she was strong enough to make it through this unless Red was by her side.

"I'm on my way," was Red's simple response. Without even a goodbye, he hung up the phone and headed back out into the night.

Miles away, Kitty placed _her_ phone back on the hook and stood silent for a moment, just trying to collect herself. Red would talk to her Steven, and things would be alright again, she just knew it. Of course, life had other plans for Kitty and she soon heard one of the other nurses calling out her name.

"Kitty, there's an Officer Williams on the phone. He says they're coming for Steven Hyde."

Her heart sunk and Kitty knew that Hyde would never get to have that talk with Red.

* * *

A word had not been spoken between Hyde and Jackie since he started to wrap her injured hand. He told himself he would finish with her hand, and that was it. Then he was gone. Jackie kept looking at him with those eyes, practically begging him to give her the satisfaction of looking back. But again and again, he would return his eyes to her hand, leaving her looking more hurt each time. Applying tape to her bandaged hand to hold his work together, he talked himself through his exit. A kiss on the forehead, a quick goodbye and he would leave. It sounded easy enough. So why couldn't he move. 

Before he could answer his own question, the door to Jackie's room swung open. Standing in the hallway were Eric and Donna. Had Hyde not known the couple before him were indeed Eric and Donna, he would have sworn they were strangers. Their smiles were gone, their dancing eyes looked dead. They looked completely and utterly devastated. It only served as another reminder to Hyde what he had done. _He_ had done this to his friends.

Upon seeing her best friend, Jackie's tears began anew, "Donna, oh God. I'm so glad you're here." Jackie sobbed as she reached out towards the redhead.

Donna wanted so badly to grab onto the outstretched hand. Everything in Donna's heart and soul was calling to her, telling her to take hold of Jackie. But every time she let her heart feel pain for Jackie, her mind flashed to that image of Kelso being covered by a white sheet. So her mind kept her feet planted, and she looked down at the gray floor, needing to avoid Jackie's eyes.

"I'm not staying." Donna's voice was so detached it didn't even sound real.

"What? Why can't you stay?" asked a confused Jackie, and Hyde could only drop his head. He knew why she couldn't stay.

Donna turned back to Jackie and ignored the tears rolling down her former best friend's battered face. Stepping into the room, Donna lifted her shaking hand and pointed it at Jackie.

"Jackie, we begged you to tell Kelso. Why didn't you just talk to him? God ..." her voice was cut off by a sob. "Why?"

"I don't know," Jackie whispered.

"Donna ..." was all Hyde got out before Donna turned on him. He just wanted her to blame him and leave Jackie out of it.

"Shut up, Hyde! I'm done talking to you. Now it's Jackie's turn."

The coldness in her voice startled everyone in the room, including Donna. She didn't understand what was happening. This wasn't her, it was someone else that was using her voice. Unable to stop the words that tumbled out of her mouth, Donna felt lost and powerless in her own skin. She turned back to glance at Eric, who had made his place in a corner of the room. He stood, leaning against the wall and refusing to meet Donna's eye. It was like he wasn't even in there. Desperately, Donna wished for Eric to tell Hyde and Jackie what had happened - to tell them about the lie she and Eric hadn't meant to tell. But Eric stood mute, and Donna was left to continue unaided.

"Why did you do this to all of us? Just for some stupid fling with Hyde?"

At that, both Jackie and Hyde turned to stare at Donna. Neither had bothered to place a title on their relationship, but Hyde was pretty sure it wasn't some meaningless fling. Not to him it wasn't, anyway.

Jackie's face seemed to crumble at her friend's inaccurate description of her relationship with Hyde. "That's why you think I did this?" she shook her head in disbelief.

Hyde hadn't realized he was holding his breath, waiting for Jackie to continue. For some reason he found himself hoping for some shred of evidence that Jackie still wanted him. "How could you think that, Donna? You're supposed to be my best friend!"

Now, Donna seemed to gain momentum from Jackie's words. "Don't you dare say that to me, Jackie. If I'm your best friend why didn't you listen to me when I told you to end things with Hyde?"

Hyde himself waited for the answer, and Jackie responded almost instantly, "Because I love being with Steven. And, God, Donna, he makes me happy" Jackie stopped, almost shocked by the forcefulness of her own statement. Before continuing, she glanced over at Hyde looking for his reaction, but Hyde's mask was firmly in place and he gave her no clue to what he was thinking. So Jackie continued, "Steven and I just wanted to be together, why couldn't you guys just see that?"

Jackie was tough, but Donna was tougher. And although Jackie showed signs of backing down, Donna didn't.

"You know what I see, Jackie? I see a girl who wanted to get back at her boyfriend by banging his best friend!"

As soon as she'd said it, Donna wanted to put the words back in her mouth. But, she'd wanted to hurt Jackie and she had accomplished her goal. Jackie's chin began to quiver and she sucked her lip into her mouth, biting it and then letting out a moan when she bit down on her own stitches. Hyde waited for Jackie to glance his way, to implore him, silently, to help her. But she never did. Hyde suddenly realized she thought she had lost him. And why wouldn't she. He had stood there, like a god damned statue while he listened to her defend their choice to be together. All the while, saying nothing. Was this what he had become, the guy who let his tiny, terrified girlfriend face the lions alone.

That did it for Hyde. He stood up and yanked the door of Jackie's room wide open. His insides were screaming but his voice was eerily quiet.

"This ends. Now."

"I'm not leaving!" Donna screamed back at him. "She needs to know what she's done! She needs to know _she's_ why Kelso's dead!"

Jackie hugged her knees up to her chest and she began rocking back and forth squeezing her eyes shut so tightly she could feel her freshly stitched skin pulling apart. Hyde stayed with his hand glued to the door. He knew if he let go he was gonna hit something or someone, and he'd done enough hitting to last him the rest of his life.

"Forman," Hyde turned to the silent man in the corner who stared blankly down at the ground, "we're not doing this."

From his place against the wall, Eric never moved. Never even blinked an eye. When he spoke, it was directed at the floor. "I never wanted to do this, Hyde. I never wanted to do _any_ of this. You two are the ones who did this."

Donna left Jackie's bedside and headed slowly towards Hyde, stopping only inches away from his face. But all he could see was Jackie silently rocking in her bed. This girl, whom just minutes earlier he had almost convinced himself to walk out on and who he now wanted to kill for.

With a sadness Hyde had never before seen, Donna smiled at him. She smiled for their lost friendship, and for the loss of Kelso, and for all the things that could no longer be. Maybe one day, she would know how to control the anger she felt bubbling over in her gut. But right now, she could only let it out. "I hope it was worth it," Donna uttered with disgust. "I hope our friend dying was worth you two being together"

Finally, forcing himself to leave his spot in the corner of the room, Eric crossed to his girlfriend and gently took hold of her by the shoulders, trying as best he could to pull her away from Hyde. "Donna," Eric's voice cracked, "let's go."

With one last backwards glance at Jackie, and one last tear for her former friends, Donna blew past Hyde as he stood, still grasping the door handle. In her mind, Donna heard Jackie yell out for Donna to come back. But it wasn't real. The only thing that was real was the fact that Kelso was gone. That was their reality now.

Eric stopped as he passed Hyde and looked at him out of the corner of his eyes. The two men who had been as close as brothers stood inches apart, and unable to say a word. If only one of them could speak, maybe things could be repaired. But they stood, not speaking, not looking - each wanting the other to be the first to break.

And then Eric was gone.

Hyde watched the person he considered to be his brother walk away. It wasn't too late, he told himself. Hyde knew if he could only open his stupid and un-cooperating mouth and tell Eric the truth - that he had listened to Kelso's last words and watched his lungs breathe their last breath - Hyde knew if he did that, Eric and Donna would find some way to forgive he and Jackie. But the words wouldn't come, the anger was too strong. He let go of the door that he had been holding onto so tightly he had lost feeling in his hand and he made it to Jackie's bed in three strides. She just rocked and rocked. Reaching out with his good arm, he ran a finger down the side of her cheek.

_Contact is all it takes._

It was at that moment, Hyde realized how he could fulfill Kelso's last wish.

'_Live a good life, Hyde.'_

He'd live a life for himself and for his friend that would never get to. Somehow, Hyde would become the kind of man that he never thought he could be. He owed it to Kelso and he owed it to Jackie- the one person who had always needed him. And maybe now, he needed her, too.

Guilt would do nothing for him. It wouldn't make his pain disappear, and it wouldn't bring Kelso back. So at that moment, Steven Hyde decided the only thing he could do, was let go. He would let go of the guilt, and the self-loathing and the eighteen years of bullshit he had built up inside of himself.

With a deep breath and scared as hell, he sat down onto the tiny bed next to Jackie. Instantly, she stopped rocking and wrapped both of her arms around him, clinging to him with a grasp that stunned Hyde. Fighting back everything that screamed at him to remember his Zen, he wrapped an arm around her and pulled her in tighter against his chest. Her sobs had turned to dry heaves now, as if she had nothing left in her to cry out. Tentatively, he lifted his broken arm out of it's sling and then, he brought it to her back.

Hyde's hands began to work up and down her back, through her hair, everywhere he could touch without hurting her. And then he began kissing her. Her mouth, her chin, her eyelids. His lips touched every inch of her skin he could see. And slowly, she stopped sobbing. In fact, she stopped moving at all. When her breathing became quiet and steady Hyde knew she was asleep. He thanked God that in sleep she didn't have to listen to people blaming her for Kelso's death. Tucking her head under his chin, he laid them back onto the bed. All the while, staring up at the ceiling and wondering how in the hell he was going to become this person that deserved the tiny broken girl in his arms.

* * *

It was funny how you could actually hear a light being turned on. 

Jackie's room lit up much to brightly to be ignored, forcing Hyde to let go of Jackie and prop himself up in the bed. The throbbing in his arm was clouding his mind and for a moment he couldn't focus on his surroundings.

"Steven. Jackie. You have to get up _now_."

Hyde realized it was Kitty's voice even before he could turn his head enough to see her quickly rummaging through the room.

"Mrs. Forman?" Hyde could see the panic in her movements and hear the urgency in her voice but none of it seemed to make any sense to him.

Before he had time to ask any more questions, Jackie began to stir. Immediately, she buried her face into Hyde's chest, bracing herself for what she feared would be another attack on her.

"Steven, you have to get up now and you have to leave. You're going to have to go out the window. I'm sorry to make you do it, but there's just no other way," Kitty's voice was terse and slightly panicked and her movements told Hyde that something was very, very wrong.

"Mrs. Forman ..." Hyde began.

Kitty cut him off, "They're coming to arrest you, Steven. They said you could go to prison for twenty years"

"What?" It was Jackie's voice that spoke but Hyde that jumped out of bed and began to move around the room, picking up Jackie's belonging as he went.

"Arrest him for what? What did he do?" Jackie called out to Kitty.

Trying to speak as quickly as she could without stopping what she was doing, Kitty continued. "It's your father, Jackie. The police finally got a hold of him to tell him you had been in an accident. And he's convinced them to charge Steven and they're on their way right now to take him."

"Charge him with what?" Jackie's seemingly endless supply of tears began to flow again. They stuck on her lashes and Jackie tried to wipe them away. "Why, _how_ could they arrest Steven?"

Jackie's innocent view of the world left Hyde to explain to her that they _could_ and apparently _would_ charge Hyde for his involvement in the car accident that had killed their friend. "They can charge me with whatever the hell they want. Violating my parole, reckless driving ... hell, they'll probably charge me with speeding."

Kitty shook her head, "No, Steven, no." Hyde looked confused and so she continued, "They're charging you with so many things; assault on Michael and endangering a minor and ... and manslaughter."

Hyde stopped and tried to comprehend what Kitty was telling him, manslaughter was nowhere near what had happened on that dark road. "Manslaughter?" Hyde could barely wrap him mind around it. "What happened was an accident, how they hell did they come up with manslaughter?"

Kitty couldn't bring herself to look at Hyde so she busied herself throwing miscellaneous medical supplies in a bag. "They say that you're the one who chased Michael, that it was_ you_ that caused the accident"

For a fleeting second, Kitty glanced at Hyde and watched as he clenched and unclenched his fists, surely a reflex that meant anger. "That's not what happened," he muttered. More for his own reassurance, than Kitty or Jackie's.

Kitty wanted him to know the rest, she knew it would hurt him but only then could he understand the situation he had been put in. "The police are saying that Michael never hurt Jackie, that what happened to her was because of the accident."

Of course, they would have to say that, Hyde realized, because no attack on Jackie left his attack on Kelso completely unprovoked making it a vicious crime instead of a horrible accident.

"Steven," Kitty looked down, not wanting to meet Hyde's eye. "Steven, they're charging you with statutory rape."

"_What!?"_ Jackie practically screamed out, resulting in a firm shushing from Kitty. The word 'rape' echoed in Jackie's mind and she shook her banging head to try and banish it from her thoughts. "But he never ... God, Steven, you _never_..."

"It doesn't matter," Hyde cut her off. "You're sixteen, I'm eighteen. If your dad says it's rape, then it's rape."

Hyde didn't give a shit about going to prison, that didn't scare him. But who would take care of Jackie if he was gone. They had to run. If they didn't, he couldn't protect her. He cupped Jackie's face into his hands and looked so deeply into her eyes Jackie swore he could see inside of her.

"Jackie, do you want to go with me?" he knew what her answer would be, but he couldn't take her away from her entire life without at least asking her.

Without a second's hesitation, Jackie nodded so quickly the pounding in her head came back even stronger than before.

"Put your arms around my neck."

She did as she was told and with one arm he lifted her petite body out of the bed. Positioning her legs around his waist, Hyde held her tightly against himself. Jackie could feel the cast from his broken arm against her waist and she would've insisted he put her down before he really hurt himself, but she knew it wouldn't have done any good. Instead, she reached out her arm and grabbed the bag Mrs. Forman held out to them.

"Now, remember what I told you to watch for with Jackie's concussion. There's bandages and everything you need to clean your cuts. There's aspirin, there's an extra sling for your arm, there's some money ..." she was speaking so quickly as if her talking would prolong the inevitable.

"Mrs. Forman ..." Hyde's voice stopped, he never thought this was the way he would say goodbye to the woman who had basically raised him. How could he ever thank her for all she and Red had done.

Kitty let out a tiny sigh and it quickly turned into a sob. She threw herself at Hyde clinging onto him like a mother sending her son out into the cruel world. "I love you both." was all she could say.

Hyde could only think of one thing to say back to the woman who had been his only real mother. "I love you, too, Mrs. Forman."

Wishing they had more time, but knowing they didn't, Kitty shoved them both towards the window. As she opened it up, she gave a silent prayer of thanks that they had put Jackie on the first floor and that Hyde was an expert at sneaking out windows.

Once they were outside, Hyde turned back to say goodbye and Jackie lifted her head from Hyde's chest to get one last look at the sweetest woman either of them would ever know. Kitty blew them one final kiss goodbye and then before Jackie could even tell Kitty thank you, she turned and headed towards the door.

* * *

They had nowhere to go, which was only appropriate since they had no way to get there. Hyde carried Jackie through the hospital parking lot, his heart skipping a beat when he saw the two police cars parked in the front. Jackie dug her nails into his back and Hyde took her hint to move faster. He headed towards the exterior walls of the hospital, and disappeared into the shadows like the fugitive he had become. Adrenaline kicked in and his pace quickened, but he knew walking fast didn't mean he was walking with a purpose. Where in the hell were they supposed to go? 

"Steven, you can't carry me forever."

"You wanna bet?"

Jackie knew it was pointless to argue, so she fought back her urge to always have the last word and laid her head down on Hyde's chest, thanking him silently for being her hero.

The fact that they had no money, no car, no clothes, no home... it was all too much for Jackie's aching and exhausted brain. But Hyde's mind was working on overdrive as he ran through option after option, coming up empty each time. It seemed their only choice was to board a bus and hope the police didn't have the terminal staked out.

In the past when he had been out of options he would rely on his friends and the Formans, but now, that wasn't possible. There had never been anyone else he could always count on. If there had ever been one time he could have benefitted from his criminal parents' advice, it would be now. But then, something in Hyde's mind reminded him, he did have someone he could go to. Immediately, he came to a halt.

"Steven?" Jackie asked nervously, obviously wondering why they had stopped.

Hyde couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it sooner. Leo. Leo was always there when Hyde needed him.

"I know where we can go."

Jackie's eyes widened with hope, the first glimpse of it Hyde had seen since the accident. "Where?"

"We're going to Leo's." Hyde shifted Jackie in his arms, trying to put most of her weight in his unbroken limb. Jackie nodded at him, showing her acceptance of his decision, then she laid her head back down. Hyde knew it was her way of telling him that he didn't have to fill the walk with trite conversation. For once in her life, Jackie was willing to accept silence and the comfort it could offer. Instead of words, their walk was filled with thoughts; Hyde thinking about how he was going to get them the hell out of Point Place and Jackie thinking that in Hyde's arms was the only place in the world that was safe for her now.

* * *

Fez ran down hall after hall, peeping in windows. The woman at the information desk had told him nothing. "Information my ass," he muttered to himself as he looked in on yet another sleeping stranger. He was so engrossed in his quest to find Hyde that he ran straight into Eric and Donna. 

With a whimper, Fez looked his friends up and down. They were covered in blood and dirt, which made Fez even more frantic to find his angry friend. "Where is Hyde?"

At the mere mention of Hyde's name Eric turned his back on the conversation and began to walk away, forcing Fez to grab the skinny man by the shoulders and shake him.

"Where is Hyde, dammit!"

"I don't know!" Eric yelled back, pulling free of Fez.

"What do you mean, you don't know?" Fez cried, close to losing it completely.

"He means, nobody knows where they are," Donna answered quietly. "They're gone, he and Jackie both."

"Gone? What, why would they be gone?" the confused man looked back and forth between Donna and Eric.

Donna glanced at her boyfriend who was now sitting hunched over on an orange vinyl hospital chair. She had hoped they could break the news to Fez together, but it didn't look like Eric was able to do anything beyond just breathing. Trying to call upon the inner courage that had helped her countless times before, Donna grabbed Fez by the hand and lead him to a chair next to Eric.

"Fez," she began as gently as she could. "Something happened tonight."

"I know, dammit! Why do you think I am down here? Do you think I came to have my appendix out again?" the agitated foreigner asked.

Drained from her argument with Hyde and Jackie, Donna wasn't sure she had the energy to tell Fez what had happened. And if she did tell Fez the nightmares she had witnessed tonight, which version would she tell him?. The truth, or the version she had so carelessly confessed to the police. The lie she now wanted so desperately to take back was quickly growing out of control. All she had wanted was to honor the memory of her dead friend. Instead, Hyde and Jackie were gone, and it was her words that had sent them away. The hardest thing was, Donna wasn't sure which emotion was more powerful: her own guilt or her anger at Hyde and Jackie. Either way, she couldn't break the news to Fez. She _wouldn't_.

Without a word, Donna rose from her chair and started down the hall leaving the men to themselves, and leaving the task of informing Fez up to Eric.

Donna walked brusquely, craving freedom from the walls that seemed to close in around her. Tonight had seen the end of the most important thing in her life - her friendships. Kelso was gone. Hyde was gone. Jackie was gone. 'And what did you do?' Donna thought to herself bitterly. She had taken what was a horrible out-of-control accident and turned it into something darker. The weight of her decision was drowning her, sucking the very life out of her.

'Tell the truth, Donna. Tell the truth.' she couldn't shut off her fucking brain.

The long and haunting hallway was finally coming to an end. Freedom, in the form of a door, was mere feet in front of her. Closer and closer, she reached out... almost able to taste the fresh air.

And then, she stopped cold as Fez's cries of grief could be heard ringing out through the echoing corridors. The Donna she had become leaned up against the cold hospital wall and froze. Motionless and totally trapped.

* * *

True to form, Leo opened up his house to Hyde and Jackie without a question. He fed them, he gave them clean clothes, and most importantly, he gave them an un-judgmental understanding that they so desperately needed. And when the sun began to rise and the time to leave approached, he gave them his only possession that they truly needed: his BMW. 

"Leo, I'll never be able to thank you for this."

"Hey man, there's no need for any thanks. I just want you and loud girl to be careful. The world can be a crazy place, man."

"Yeah," was Hyde's only response. Nobody needed to remind him of that.

"Bye, Leo." Jackie gave Leo a kiss on his cheek and a small smile.

Jackie had never until this moment understood Hyde's affection for the dirty hippy. But here he was, the only one of their friends who had showed them any kindness; the only one who didn't blame them for Kelso's death.

"Bye, Loud Girl," he grinned.

Hyde helped Jackie into the passenger side seat of what was now their car, taking the time to buckle the set belt around her. It was such a simple gesture, but to Jackie it was just one more reminder that Hyde had given up everything to take care of her. Gently, she reached up and cupped his scruffy face in her hands. Pulling his face to hers to kiss him, she was stunned when Hyde turned his head and kissed the inside of her palm where the gauze from her yanked IV was wrapped. Then, he quickly headed towards the driver's side door and climbed in, leaving Jackie to sit in shocked silence at his tender gesture.

Taking one last look at Leo, Hyde knew the odds were against the two of them ever seeing one another again. He had said more goodbyes today then he had in his whole life, and he simply couldn't bring himself to say one more. So without a wave or even a nod, Hyde turned his head and began to back out of Leo's driveway.

A goodbye wasn't necessary for Leo, he preferred not to dwell on goodbyes, instead he would choose to wait for the next "hello". With an ache in his heart and a small smile on his weathered face, Leo waved to Jackie and Hyde as they backed out of his driveway. He waved to them as they drove down the street. He waved to them until the car was nothing but a speck in the distance. And then, he found himself whispering to no one in his now empty garage.

"Take care of yourself, Hyde."

* * *

North. Several hours into their drive and that was the only thing Jackie knew for sure about where she and Hyde were headed. 

The drive was silent and monotonous, and strangely comforting. After all that had happened to them, if Jackie closed her eyes and pretended, she could almost imagine she was on just another ride with Hyde. But in reality, they were running from a life that would offer nothing but misery. She didn't know what they were running towards, but it had to be better than what they were leaving behind. Selfishly, Jackie found herself wondering if their banishment to the unknown was their punishment for what had happened to Kelso. As if what was happening to them somehow compared to what had happened to their friend.

Turning her attention back to the wad of bills in her hands, Jackie looked at Hyde. "We've got just over seven hundred dollars." It didn't sound like much, but the bills in Jackie's hand combined with what Kitty had snuck into the bag she had packed would be enough for the time being. It was a miracle the bank teller had let Jackie empty out her bank account. But Jackie could be pretty convincing when she had to. Thank God she had gotten a male teller. And thank God her father had been too preoccupied to think about closing Jackie's bank account.

"Jackie," Hyde paused and glanced at the girl beside him, "where the hell are we going?"

Looking out the car window at the trees and fields that passed, Jackie found herself absentmindedly rubbing her bandaged forehead. "Let's just drive,"she said quietly, before laying her head down on Hyde's chest.

Out of habit, Hyde reverted back to his smart-ass ways. "Alright, but if you let me choose we're probably gonna end up in Canada. They've got better beer up there."

She loved so much that he was trying desperately to make things alright again, to make things normal. Jackie had no memory of the worst moment of their lives. But Hyde had enough memories for both of them. In twenty-four hours he had become so different. He had always been her partner in crime, her protector, the person she always ran to. But he only let her get so close to him and then the walls went up. Now, it seemed the hardness was gone. The walls were down.

"Canada's alright with me," she yawned and let her eyes close.

Hyde looked down at the girl next to him and realized in twenty-four hours she had become so different. She had grown up. He had always felt some inner desire to protect her, and he knew, even if no one else did, there was more to her than the shallow, spoiled exterior everyone else saw. Now, he was pretty sure the spoiled cheerleader was gone forever.

Suddenly realizing something, he gingerly pulled his arm from out of his sling and began patting his pants pockets, his shirt pocket, the collar of his tee shirt.

"What's the matter, Steven?"

He had no idea where they were. He hadn't worn them in twenty-four hours.

'Fuck it,' he thought with a snort_. ' _I don't need 'em anymore.'

Winding his arm around his girlfriend, and drawing her back to him, Hyde shook his head.

"Nothing, doll."

* * *

**A/N** Happy New Year!!!!!! And a review would be a swell way to ring in 2007 :) 


	6. Chapter 6

Alright, this took way too long and I won't let it happen again. Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed, you have no idea how much it means to me. And thanks as usual to luvcali for her always helpful advice.

I own nothing.

Reviews are greatly appreciated.

* * *

It was a perfect day for a funeral. The clouds were out, dark and ominous looking; and the dense air promised that a late summer storm was on the way. The Forman family drove home from the cemetery in complete silence. Even Laurie and Eric, who would normally be at each other's throats in the cramped quarters of the Toyota's backseat, stood staring out their windows. There was nothing that could be said.

When at last Red turned the car into the driveway and parked it, the doors flew open and four people stepped out. "It was a lovely service" Eric heard his mother say to no one in particular. He never understood that statement. Wouldn't it have been more lovely if no funeral had taken place? Why did people feel the need to make even a funeral seem enjoyable. Why couldn't they just say, the funeral was the worst fucking thing that had ever happened. Because it meant that someone was dead. And no amount of flowers or crumb cakes or well-wishers could make up for that.

Laurie headed straight through the kitchen and up towards her room. She had seemed more affected by Kelso's death than anyone had expected. Eric almost wanted to follow after his sister, he needed so desperately to talk to someone. Anyone. But his mother's voice stopped him.

"Sweetie, can I make you something to eat?"

Lamely, Eric shook his head. Standing in the middle of the kitchen, he felt like a stranger in his own house. He had no idea where to go. There was nowhere he could go, really. The basement seemed like a prison to him now. Everything in the room served only as a reminder that Kelso and Hyde were gone. Wondering for a split second if Donna was home yet, Eric quickly shoved the thought aside. Since the accident and the subsequent lie he and Donna had agreed upon, things between the two had been strained to say the least. Donna would offer no more comfort than the basement. So Eric seemed, again, to be out of options. A man without a refuge.

How ridiculous did he look, he wondered, standing in the middle of his kitchen, unmoving and silent. Kitty looked pained, as if she couldn't bear to see her son in such a state. Gently, she took his arm and guided him into a chair at the kitchen table. Red wandered to the fridge and pulled out two beers. Once he was seated, he opened one for himself and silently pushed the other towards Eric.

"Eric," Kitty began again. "Your father and I wanted to talk to you about something."

Having no idea what it could possibly be, Eric simply took a long drink of his beer and waited.

"It's about what happened the night ..." Kitty stopped obviously not knowing what choice of words would hurt Eric the least. The night Kelso died? The night Hyde left? The night your world turned upside down? It wouldn't have matter how she described that night. To Eric, they were all synonymous.

Kitty began to stammer, and Eric wondered what it was that had her so nervous. With a helpless glance, Kitty looked back and forth between Red and Eric. "Eric, we wanted to talk to you about what happened between Steven and Michael."

It was a conversation Eric was not prepared to have. He wasn't proud of what he and Donna had done, but he had managed to convince himself that it was over and he couldn't take it back. If his mother began questioning him about it, how long would he be able to lie.

"It's just," Kitty started, "I don't understand why the police would think Steven meant to hurt Michael?"

"Maybe because that's what happened," Eric stated in a matter-of-fact tone. It was frightening that he almost believed his own lie.

Red looked his son in the eye, and immediately, Eric looked away. "Eric, your mother talked to Steven and he told her that it was an accident."

"An accident that _Hyde_ caused," Eric countered, bitterly. That was, in fact, the truth. If not for Hyde dating Jackie there would have been no car chase.

A plate of food in her hands, Kitty joined Red and Eric at the table. "Steven told me that Michael went after _him_, and that Jackie was simply in the way; and _that's_ how she was hurt. Not during the crash but here," she gestured towards the sliding door, "in the driveway."

Hearing Kitty defend Hyde brought Eric to full attention. Now was his chance to be free of the insidious lie that had sent Hyde running. Eric wouldn't even have to say anything, he could just nod in agreement and the lie would be no more. It was so simple. A quick up and down of the head and Eric would be free of his invisible chains. Kitty and Red stared, waiting for his response. But the lie was stronger than Eric, and it had a hold on him that would not be easily broken.

Laurie chose that particular moment to slowly stagger through the kitchen door, clutching an odd collection of items in her arms. "These, um ... these were some things of Kelso's that I found." Never before had Laurie seemed to show so much emotion. Or _any _emotion, for that matter. But as she held onto a ratty tee shirt in her outstretched arm, Eric realized she was shaking. "I'm gonna go see if Kelso's mom would like them," she finished with a sad smile. Slowly, Laurie made her way though the kitchen and out the sliding door, never stopping when Kitty called her name.

As if his sister's grief was the catalyst, in mere seconds, the lie had gained more power and Eric found himself feeling almost confrontational. "I'll be in my room," he spoke as he stood to leave.

Scrambling to get up, Kitty clutched at his arm to stop him. "Eric, what you told the police and what Steven told me, they ... they can't both be true."

Realizing what she was saying, Eric turned his gaze on his mother. "Are you," he stopped and shook his head in disbelief, "are you saying I'm _lying_?"

But Kitty was quick to respond, "No. No I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to. I know it's what you meant." Eric pulled his arm out of Kitty's grasp. The fact that Kitty believed Hyde over her own son gave Eric a bitter taste in his mouth.

"I just meant that things were so crazy that day, and maybe you got confused about what happened. And now, now that you've had time to think back, maybe you remember things differently." Kitty's words were coming fast and the gentle emotion she put behind them was lost on Eric, who was now too angry to hear anything other than his own mother accusing him of lying. The fact that it was true seemed inconsequential.

"I can't believe you're taking Hyde's word over mine," he stated, in a monotone voice.

"Eric, that's not what your mother's doing." Red stood and faced his son with the least threatening stare he could muster.

"Yes it is!" Eric shouted. "That's _exactly_ what you're doing."

Kitty shook her head, frantically trying desperately not to lose another one of her children. "Eric, I'm just trying to say no matter what happened that day I love you; you and Steven, both. And nothing you said or did will change that."

Eric couldn't believe how much it hurt to have his mother doubt him. It filled him with an anger and hurt he'd never before felt in his life. When he opened his mouth to speak, it was the anger that took over. "Well that's good, Mom, because you know what Hyde did that day? He killed Kelso."

At the harsh words, Kitty let out a sob from the bottom of her gut. The sounds left Eric, ashamed of his lies but now more powerless than ever against them. Blindly, he headed towards the living room, his emotions out of control.

He felt angry at Donna for putting him in the middle of the lie to begin with. Stronger still was his anger at his parents for abandoning him in favor of a person that wasn't even their flesh and blood. But perhaps the worse feeling was the self-hatred coursing through Eric's body. He hated himself for lying, for being jealous of Hyde, for not being able to admit the truth. It made him feel weak and bitter, and most of all - hopeless. Eric had never felt so hopelessly lost in his entire life. And there was no one to show him the way back to the road his life had been on.

* * *

_Duluth, Minnesota_

Never had a building looked so large to Jackie. So foreboding. Squeezing Hyde's hand as tightly as she could, she reached up with her un-occupied arm and rubbed the bandage covering her still stitched forehead.

"Jackie..."

"I can't do it," she whispered as she rubbed over and over; her finger tracing the gash that only reminded her of what had happened to bring them to this place. "I can't do it, Steven. Please don't make me," she implored him.

Looking into her wildly terrified and mismatched eyes, Hyde almost gave in. As he glanced back and forth between Jackie and the high school that stood looming over them, he realized walking away would be so much easier - for both of them. He hated school, always had. It would be so much simpler to turn around and get back in the car, find some menial job somewhere and just live life. But one day, they'd wake up and they'd still be working that same job. And they'd still be living in their cramped one-bedroom apartment, with not even enough room to breath. That wasn't the kind of life he wanted for them. And if they didn't walk into the building in front of them, that was the kind of life they would have.

With his sexiest smirk and his most confident gaze he lifted Jackie's chin up so she could see his uncovered blue eyes. "You think I'm gonna let anything happen to you?" He paused for her response, but it wasn't necessary, he could see it in her eyes. The complete faith. It would have unnerved him two weeks ago, but now it only gave him strength. "Jackie, I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you."

But Jackie wouldn't be convinced easily. "People are gonna ask me about my face, and where I'm from and, God, I just can't deal with that right now," she shook her head and crossed her arms in defiance. "I'm not going in, Steven, and you can't make me," As if to emphasize her point, she stuck her lip out and glared at him - waiting. Hyde knew she was counting on her pouting face and puppy dog eyes to sway him. But this was one time she wasn't going to win.

Being vocal was new to Hyde and he wouldn't do it unless it was absolutely necessary; and looking at his girlfriend he realized it was absolutely necessary. Clearly the lovey-dovey crap wasn't getting through to her. He was going to have to revert to an old tactic that had always worked well in the past. He was going to piss her off.

"You know what, Jackie. Do whatever the hell you want. You always do."

Turning away from her, Hyde started up the stairs. It was mere seconds before he heard the sounds of footsteps behind him causing a grin to spread across his face. Mission accomplished.

"S-Steven...what, _wait_...you can't just leave me."

"Sure I can," he smirked. "Watch."

Again he turned to go, and again she followed. "But, I don't wanna go in there."

"Then I hope you find something to do with your day. Oh, and make sure you pick me up at 2:15."

The look on her face was priceless. You could've run a freight train through the opening in her mouth. Hyde hated being such an ass to her, but he couldn't back down and he sure as hell wasn't going to beg and plead with her, or God forbid, give her some sugar-coated speech about how wonderful school was going to be. That would be a lie, and he knew it. It was going to be miserable. Even more miserable than school back home. At least back home, they had friends to make the day a little more interesting. Eric and Donna were always good for a laugh, and Fez's constant scuffles with the football team kept Hyde in fighting shape and gave him an excuse to pound on a jock. Then there was Kelso, Hyde couldn't even count the number of times he and Kelso had ditched school, or hid in the auditorium to have their own circle. Yeah, school without Kelso was going to be a bitch. Hell, _life_ without Kelso was going to be a bitch. But sitting on the steps of Duluth East high school wasn't going to bring him back. So Hyde told his feet to keep walking and he told his mouth to keep quiet, and the only thing he could do was hope that Jackie would be angry enough to follow him.

"I cannot believe you are going to leave me out here by myself." Jackie called after Hyde as he trudged up the stairs.

Without looking back, he yelled out to her, "It's your choice, doll. But I'm going inside this fucking building and I'm gonna get a stupid fricking locker and then I'm gonna go sit in some god damn classroom and pretend like I care what the square root of 633 is." It was a gamble, Hyde knew it. His plan could just as easily backfire and Jackie would break down in sobs. And then, Hyde knew he would relent. He wouldn't be able to force Jackie into the school if she had tears streaming down her face. The only thing he could hope for was that somewhere in her soul, she still had the fire that would make her follow her boyfriend up those stairs; if only just to yell at him.

The door was inches away now, Hyde slowed his step while, at the same time, trying not to alert Jackie that he knew his bluff had been called. There was no way in hell he was leaving her out on the stairway alone. But before he had time to come up with a new plan, he heard the familiar cloppity-clop of Jackie's clogs. Within seconds, she was beside him, angry look firmly in place.

"There's no way you're going in there without me," she glared at him. "Some skank will probably try and claim you for herself."

Trying not to laugh, Hyde nodded in agreement. "As she should. I'm a hell of a catch."

Jackie rolled her eyes and shoved past Hyde, reaching out for the door and then, proceeding inside without another moment of hesitation.

A small sense of satisfaction crept over Hyde. It was a minor victory. But in what was sure to be one of the shitiest days in Hyde's entire life; a minor victory was better than nothing.

* * *

_Point Place, Wisconsin_

Eric stared at the empty seat next to him. It was Kelso's seat, or at least, it _had_ been. Now it sat empty, and that seemed worse to Eric than if another person had sat in it. Instead, it had become almost a shrine to the popular and charismatic boy who had sat there. No one dared take Kelso's chair, or his locker, or anything that could be branded "his" in the school.

Kids that had never talked to Eric were suddenly telling him how sorry they were, what a great guy Kelso was. The sympathy should've made Eric feel better; but it didn't. He just wanted everyone to leave him the hell alone. Since the funeral, he avoided his parents as much as possible. Avoiding was preferable to another confrontation. Laurie had gone back to Chicago, and there was obviously no best friend living in the basement so the house was beyond silent. The silence was what Eric was slowly becoming used to, it was strangely comforting. If only the weepy morons at school could figure that out maybe his days would pass a little faster.

For the first few weeks after the accident, Donna had pressed him, trying to get Eric to open up about his feelings. She must have realized it was a lost cause, because she had given up her quest for conversation. Now they just sat; sometimes in Eric's room, on occasion in the basement, but more often than not they were in the Cruiser. Almost as if they were trying to escape, they would park along a deserted road or in an empty parking lot. Eric felt like a fugitive running from his own mind. But his mind was clever, and it always managed to find him.

On the occasion that Fez would join the couple, he mostly just cried. That is, until Eric or Donna would tell him to knock it off. Then he would shuffle off into Hyde's room and shut the door behind him; the cheap plywood doing nothing to muffle the sound of his sobs.

Kelso's absence had probably hit Fez harder than anyone else. And yet, he somehow managed to keep his bitterness at bay when it came to Hyde and Jackie. If he had tried to hate them, it wouldn't have worked anyway. So instead, Fez had taken it upon himself to clear out Hyde's room. He lovingly packed Hyde's belongings in box after box and then brought each one home with him. Maybe he was afraid Eric would throw them away, or maybe he was hoping that Hyde would return looking for the life and the room he had left behind.

Neither would happen. But Eric didn't have the heart to tell Fez.

His thoughts returning to Kelso's desk, Eric found himself noticing some graffiti left behind on the wood. Before he could stop it, a smile crept in. Kelso always did have a fondness for vandalism. Eric leaned in closer to the vacant seat, wondering if people were thinking he was crazy for paying so much attention to a chair.

The words were carved into the desk and then filled in with pen. It was Kelso's favorite technique. Because even if the janitor managed to get the ink out, the indentations were left behind for future generations to see. The message was scrawled in pointy block letters and the words were stacked one on top of the other. It read simply, "The basement rules"

Instantly wishing he had never seen his friend's message from beyond, Eric stood up out of his chair and headed towards the door. A buzzing rang through his ears and his eyes narrowed to tunnel vision. He wasn't sure how much time he had before he either passed out or began to cry so he sped his pace up completely ignoring his teacher's inquisitions.

_The basement rules._

The basement never ruled. The basement was just a room. It was the people in the basement that ruled. It was the rapport and the burns and the constant haze in the air and Stones creeping into the senses that ruled. The basement was simply walls and a floor. Without the people in it, the basement meant nothing.

He walked the halls of Point Place High towards the door that lead to his only port in the storm - the Cruiser. And of all the stupid thoughts to think the one that popped into his mind seemed the stupidest he had ever come up with.

'I wonder if Jackie and Hyde have a basement ... wherever they are.'

* * *

_Duluth, Minnesota_

One month.

They had been in this godforsaken school for one month. So far, Jackie had wanted to run screaming out the front door more times than she could count. She never realized how unbearable she had made life for girls at Point Place High. Being a bitch was just what Jackie Burkhart did, and if other people's feelings got hurt - it really wasn't her problem. But being on the receiving end of a popular girl's taunts was miserable. Of course, Jackie gave as good as she got. But it didn't stop the teasing or the nasty sideways glances.

There were so many rumors about her and Hyde. One of her favorites: they had run away from home to become rock stars. What kind of idiot would run away to the frozen tundra to try and become famous. There was, of course, the pregnancy rumor; which Jackie quickly put an end to by wearing a couple of form fitting dresses. And then there were the people that went a little wilder, spreading the story that she and Hyde were in the witness protection program after testifying against some mobsters. Hyde actually liked that one. If only people realized - the truth was more horrifying than any of the rumors.

The rumors amused Hyde. It had taken him all of about two hours to build a reputation as someone who was not to be fucked with. A rather foolish football player had made the mistake of trying to bait Hyde into an argument. Hyde had answered the guy by using his large jock head to close a locker.

But Hyde's rep didn't save Jackie from the girls. Girls were more vicious than the entire football and hockey teams put together. One girl in particular had Jackie set firmly in her sights. Tiffany Manning. The most popular girl in school. She was a tiny, beautiful, brunette. A cheerleader and the Homecoming Queen...she was Duluth East's Jackie Burkhart. Every day it was something with Tiffany. She made fun of Jackie's clothes, which, in turn, made Jackie wish she could scream back, "you should've seen my walk-in closet full of Calvin Kleins and Gloria Vanderbilts!" Another of Tiffany's favorite taunts was ridiculing Jackie for having, apparently, no talents or interests outside of dressing like a poor person. Jackie wanted so badly to show that bitch what a good high kick and herkie jump really looked like. But of course, she didn't. It was enough that Jackie knew she was a better cheerleader than the entire Duluth East squad. Well, it was _almost_ enough.

Some days, Jackie dreamed she was back in Point Place again, wearing her designer clothes and applying her bubble gum lip smacker as she and the rest of the squad tormented some poor girl for wearing last years gauchos. With a horrible pang of regret, Jackie realized that the girl, like Jackie herself now, probably couldn't afford anything else. But that thought had never crossed Jackie's mind. Or, if it had, it hadn't mattered.

The only part of her day she looked forward to were the few minutes she got to spend with Hyde. Unlike Point Place, Duluth East was a large school which meant Jackie had no classes with Hyde. The juniors and seniors had no interaction, save for passing each other in the halls or the occasional pep rally. But that didn't mean Hyde wasn't always watching. As soon as Jackie stepped out of her classroom, there he was - sardonic grin firmly in place on his bearded face.

But today, as she exited American History, he was nowhere to be found. A terrified feeling spread through Jackie's body, starting at her toes and crawling out through the ends of her hair causing her to shiver and bumps to appear on her arms. 'He's been caught,' was the only thing she could think of. Blindly, she ran the halls, her eyes scanning the crowd looking for Hyde's familiar form. Panic set in as Jackie tripped over a stack of books carelessly placed in the middle of the hall. Why couldn't she find him?

Jackie climbed the stairs to the second floor so fast, she was panting. One thing was for certain, she wasn't going to let them take Hyde away from her. If she had to kick every shin in this god damn school she would. The halls seemed so long and every person in them stared at Jackie like she was crazy as she tore wildly down them. Never stopping, Jackie turned corner after corner in the labyrinthine building. Hyde's locker was approaching and it was the last place she could think to look.

Then suddenly, she stopped her sprint, as her heart sank to the floor. In front of her stood Steven, pressed up against his locker by none other than Tiffany Manning. Immediately, Jackie was transported back in time to the countless days she had seen Kelso with another girl. Her stomach began to knot. She knew what was coming. And for some reason, she could only stand and watch. She had been stupid enough to believe Hyde was different, but she had been wrong. Yet again. They were all the same.

Darting behind a group of kids, Jackie peered in morbid curiosity at her boyfriend and the over-sexed cheerleader who had him pinned. Tiffany's brightly painted nails began to scrape up and down Hyde's chest and Jackie found herself wanting to rip the slut's eyes out. But she stood paralyzed, almost as if she wanted to watch Hyde betray her. It hurt worse than seeing Kelso kiss Laurie. It hurt worse than learning Kelso had had sex with Laurie. Watching another girl touch Hyde hurt worse than anything Jackie had ever felt in her entire life. That stinging sensation of wet tears began to build up in her eyes. And still, Jackie couldn't take her eyes off of the sight in front of her.

But to her surprise, Hyde made no move to accept Tiffany's advances. In fact, he looked almost annoyed. His eyes darted from side to side and a familiar look spread across his face. It was the look he got right before he blew up.

Like the skilled seductress that she was, Tiffany leaned in and grabbed onto Hyde's tee shirt, yanking him towards her, placing her lips on Hyde's. Before Jackie knew what was happening, she was witness to her boyfriend being pawed by the girl who made it her personal mission to make Jackie's life a living hell. Faster than Jackie could comprehend what was happening, Hyde put an end to the unwanted kiss. With a force that wasn't as hard as he used for a fight but one that definitely meant business, Hyde reached up and took hold of Tiffany by both arms. He literally pulled her away from his body, then in one quick motion he spun her around and pressed her back up against a locker. It stunned Jackie, and by the look on the skank's face, it stunned her as well. Apparently, she was not used to being turned down.

Although she couldn't hear the words, it didn't take much for Jackie to figure out what was being said. Clearly, Hyde was pissed at being attacked like some kind of prey. As a look of shock mingled with embarrassment crossed Tiffany's perfectly made-up face, Jackie realized that this must be the part where Hyde made threats. His usual, "try that again and ..." fill in the blank with any number of unpleasant thoughts. Belittled and angry, Tiffany spat something out at Hyde before turning on her wedge heel and stomping off. Hyde didn't even bother to watch her go, he simply began heading down the hallway towards, Jackie could only assume, Jackie's American History room.

It was then that she realized Hyde wasn't Kelso, and suddenly she felt ashamed that she had ever doubted him. It was unfair to both of them to blame him for things that her previous boyfriend had done. Jackie decided instantly that she would never tell Hyde what she had seen. There was no need. So, with a quick wipe of her eyes, Jackie straightened her less than designer outfit and proceeded towards Hyde's locker.

Seeing Jackie, Hyde's stony expression quickly turned to the familiar look of concern mingled with a little annoyance.

"Dammit, Jackie, I told you if I'm late - you wait for me in your classroom."

Aching to reach out and touch him, Jackie's hands began to crawl along his body, starting first at his neck and traveling slowly down his chest as she ran one finger into between his pecs. Like a woman on a mission, her second hand joined the first and they scratched lazily down his stomach muscles finally coming to rest on his belt buckle. She hooked her fingers around the large metal cannabis and pulled Hyde's hips towards hers.

Hyde tried his best to look annoyed, but it was to no avail. "Why didn't you wait for me?"

Locking eyes with him, Jackie responded, "Where were you?"

"Why didn't you wait for me?"

"Where were you?" she asked with slightly more force.

Arching his eyebrow in response he added, "I asked you first."

"Yeah," she smiled, "but I asked _nicer_." As if to remind him, she let her fingertips graze along the top of his waistband.

Weakened, Hyde had no choice but to respond. "Some fucking idiot tried to detain me."

"Well, we can't have that now, can we."

"Nope," he shook his head. "We sure as hell can't."

With a smile and an inner confidence Jackie crushed her lips against Hyde's and they stood in the hallway...two wanna-be rock stars running from the mob and kissing like a pair of maniacs.

* * *

I know, I know, you hate me. But that's okay, I have just the thing ... if you're feeling a little down go check out my other story where a happy and angst-free E/D just got married.

This will be the last update for a couple weeks as I am going on vacation. I'll update when I get home.

Wouldn't it be fun if when I got home from vacation my inbox was filled with reviews? (the answer is "yes" that would be fun)

Thanks for reading :)


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed and for all the well wishes! It was so sweet of you guys! As always, I own nothing and reviews are greatly appreciated. Unless you just want to tell me how much you dislike the story. Then you can keep that to yourself ;)

* * *

_Point Place, Wisconsin_

_June 6, 1979_

Here they were. Graduation. Stupid, pointless, once-upon-a-time-exciting graduation. Last summer it had been all the talk - but here it was and none of them really cared.

This was supposed to be the time right before he and Donna disappeared to a larger and more glamourous city to start college. But college had been put on hold. Or, if Eric was honest, called off. Neither of them had the desire to work that hard. They had barely made it through their last year of high school. Hell, they had barely made it through their last year of _life_.

Red had yelled and Kitty had cried, both trying their best to bring Eric out of his depression. But Eric knew the only thing that could end his pain was a tall moron and a curly haired delinquent. And neither were available.

Graduation had left Eric thinking about expectations. He had always _expected_ they would be friends forever. He had always _expected _they would be here together today. But they were only half of what they had once been. And six people minus three people equaled a miserable life. Eric had almost failed math but he knew that equation by heart.

Clutching his diploma in his hands, Eric glanced back at his family. He didn't even want to think about _their_ expectations because the guilt of it all would drive him insane. Eric was sure that his parents had expected to have two kids graduate today. But instead, they were left with one. Briefly, Eric let himself smile at his mom and dad. Red sat with his arms crossed and gave Eric a nod. Kitty quickly snapped a picture and waved. Laurie simply looked down at her hands. Next to them sat a tearful Bob and Joanne. Bob seemed even more weepy these days, if that was possible. Suddenly, Eric was brought out of his daze by the realization of what letter they were on.

"Gary Henderson ..."

Eric could almost hear Hyde next to him.

'_Hey, man, do you think they can tell I'm not wearing anything under this lame robe?'_

It had always been one of he and Hyde's genius plans: to be completely nude under their ceremony attire.

Eric stole a quick glance at Donna and Fez, wondering if the letter "H" stirred any emotion in them. Or maybe, he was the only one that was going crazy. Donna was staring into the distance and Fez looked horribly nervous, perhaps at the thought that the principal would mispronounce his name. But neither of them appeared to realize Steven Hyde was about to be erased.

"Natalie Humphrey..."

Why did Eric want to jump up and run away? He knew what name was supposed to be next, he also knew that he wouldn't hear that name called. It would be skipped over, as if the name and the person attached to it had never existed.

"Aaron Issacson..."

There it was. It had been so easy to do, apparently. Just cross one name off and move to the next name on the list. Who would ever notice? Eric just wanted graduation to be over. Once it was, he and Donna could move away and start trying to forget Point Place. But for the present time - he was stuck in a folding chair out on the football field and the day was about to get much worse; because "K" was coming up next.

* * *

_Duluth, MN_

_June 6, 1979 _

Graduation was supposed to be some monumental thing. But so far, there was nothing monumental about it. They were celebrating in the only way they could afford - at the Dairy Queen. Sitting on the hood of their car, Jackie ate her cone in silence while Hyde downed his second beer. She knew Hyde had missed Kelso today. But Jackie also knew it was a good thing to miss him. Missing Kelso kept his memory stronger.

The sidewalks surrounding the restaurant were crowded and the streets full of cars buzzing slowly by as people enjoyed the start of summer after a long winter. But to Hyde and Jackie, there might as well have been no one else on the planet.

It seemed they were both lost in their thoughts, and Hyde wondered if Jackie was thinking the same thing he was. Was her mind on another graduation hundreds of miles away, as his was. He couldn't help but wonder if Eric, Donna and Fez were celebrating tonight. For years they had talked of their graduation, of the partying they would do and the beers they would drink. But tonight was not the celebration he had planned on.

"You have an extra one of those?" Jackie asked, as she pointed to Hyde's beer.

"That depends," he grinned. "You got something for me?"

With a knowing laugh, Jackie scooted in closer to her boyfriend and placed her slightly sticky lips on his. Hyde grinned; she tasted like ice cream. Breaking their kiss, he crunched a beer can with his hand and tossed it aside. "I've gotta take a leak. Don't talk to-"

Jackie cut him off with an upheld hand and a roll of her eyes. "I know, I know ... don't talk to anyone. God, you sound like one of those after school specials, Steven."

"Oh please. If I'm any kind of TV show I'm a wrestling match." Hopping off the car, he looked back over his shoulder to give Jackie a quick wink before heading inside the tiny ice cream stand.

A smile crept across Jackie's face that she couldn't stop and those butterflies began to flutter around her stomach. Hyde had looks that could turn her into a puddle. He also had looks that could make her want to scratch his eyes out; but those were getting fewer and far between. She opened her beer and took a slow drink. Ice cream, beer and the man she loved. Oh, and it had finally hit fifty degrees. With a contented sigh, Jackie lay back on the hood of the car and gazed up at the stars. Maybe it wasn't Point Place or the celebration either of them had planned on; but maybe this one was better. After only a few minutes of silence she heard the crunching of gravel approaching.

"Would you be mad if I said I drank all your beers?" she teased.

"Um, no but will you be mad if I ask you for directions?" a voice that wasn't Hyde's answered back.

Startled, Jackie sat up and stared at the man in front of her. He gave a slightly embarrassed smile as Jackie quickly hoped off of the car and shifted awkwardly.

"I'm sorry," he continued. "I'm just really lost and I was hoping you could send me on the right way."

As if he could sense Jackie's unease, the young man backed up slightly into the glow of the streetlight revealing to Jackie he was completely normal looking. There was no harm in answering him, she figured.

"Believe me, you do _not_ want directions from me. You'll end up in Canada."

"That's okay," he chuckled. "That's where I want to go."

"Oh, well then," Jackie shrugged, "I'm your girl." Jackie pointed in the direction of the DQ, "But if you actually want _good _directions - my boyfriend's inside. He can get you wherever you need to go."

"Do you mind if I wait for him?" the man asked a little hesitantly.

In the back of her mind Jackie heard Hyde's voice over and over telling her never to talk to anyone she didn't know. But the man seemed completely harmless; geeky almost. He reminded Jackie of Eric. She didn't see the harm in letting him hang around. "Sure," she stated with a nonchalant shrug.

"Thanks," he said and reached out his hand. "I'm Ben."

Taking the offered hand, Jackie gave it a quick shake. "Hi."

Ben backed up again, and Jackie watched as he grabbed a dog-eared map out of his back pocket and studied it in total frustration. "I was about to drive my car into Lake Superior," he gave a nerdy laugh and Jackie had a sudden desire to ask Ben if he was a "Star Wars" fan.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

'Shit' was the only thing that crossed Jackie's mind. And before Jackie could open her mouth to explain, Hyde had grabbed a terrified-looking Ben by the shirt collar and backed him up against the car.

"I ... I just needed directions." Ben sputtered out.

Jackie crossed to Hyde and tried to pull him off the panicking Canadian pinned against the BMW. "Steven ..."

But Hyde cut her off. "Does she look like the fucking tourist information center?" he asked, throttling Ben slightly.

"N-No." Ben's words tumbled out in a jumbled mess. "She said you could give me directions."

"Steven!" A crowd was beginning to gather around Hyde and Ben and if someone got it in their heads to call the cops - life for Jackie and Hyde in Duluth was over. "_Steven_!" she yelled louder this time, digging her nails into Hyde's back.

With a start, Hyde turned to look at Jackie. His face was flushed and his breath was choppy. Jackie used both of her hands to take hold of his scruffy cheeks. "Steven, let him go. He just wanted directions to 35."

Slowly, Jackie's words began to register in Hyde's mind and he turned to the quivering man he had tackled to the car. Hyde's "kick ass first, ask questions second" policy had become second nature to him. With a mumbled apology, Hyde released his grip and helped Ben stand back up. As soon as he was free, the petrified man took off running.

"Don't you need directions?" Jackie yelled after Hyde's fleeing victim.

"That's okay, I'll find it eventually," Ben responded without turning back for another glance.

The crowd realizing that there wouldn't be a fight to punctuate the evening, began to dissipate; leaving behind only Jackie and Hyde. Crisis averted, Jackie could now concentrate on her next task: yelling at Hyde for being so stupid. She placed her hands on her hips and stared at her boyfriend who could only grin sheepishly.

"Well how the hell was I supposed to know he wasn't some thug that wanted to kidnap you?"

"Oh I don't know ... maybe the pocket protector should've clued you in," Jackie shot back.

Hyde ran a hand through his wild hair and exhaled sharply. "Jackie, I don't think you understand that there are people out there who are just fucking bad. Plain and simple, babe. And you think we're at a fucking roller disco mixer and everyone wants to be your friend."

Most of the time Jackie reveled in Hyde's protectiveness, but not when it came in the guise of patronizing. "And I don't think _you _understand that I'm a big girl and I can tell the difference between a criminal and a lost Canadian!" she spat back.

He understood why she was angry, but there was, at times, there was no other way to get through to her. Because, honestly, sometimes he didn't think she got it - the precariousness of their situation. He was a fugitive and she was a runaway. But more than that, she was his responsibility, one he accepted gladly, but one that troubled him none the less. She wasn't easy to watch after, sometimes she drove him insane, but the thought of losing her drove him nearly out of his mind.

"Dammit, Jackie, if something ever happened to you ..." his voice trailed off before he could complete his sappy sentence but it was too late. Someone might as well have stuck a fork in Hyde, because he was done. Jackie had him wrapped around her finger and now, what was worse, she knew it.

Her jaw dropped and for a moment Hyde almost thought she was too stunned to speak, but no such luck. "You beat up some poor, geeky, northwoods nerd because you love me?"

"Okay, first of all I didn't beat him up. I just wrinkled him a little bit. And second of all..." Hyde stopped mid-sentence. There was nothing left to say. There was no more stalling. He should have said it sooner because it was how he felt. But saying it and feeling it were completely different things.

But as he looked into Jackie's face with it's hopeful expression it suddenly seemed stupid that words should scare him, when they had been through much scarier things. So he took the leap.

"Second of all..." he began again in a lame effort to stall. His voice got quieter, but his eyes, unblinking, looked directly into hers. "I love you, Jackie."

Hyde expected a squeal or a triumphant, 'I told you so.' But he got neither. Instead his loud, pushy, sometimes bratty girlfriend, began to cry. With a rush, Jackie threw herself into Hyde's unsuspecting arms and buried her face in his chest. The forceful contact between their bodies nearly knocked the wind out of Hyde. But he regained his momentarily lost senses and wrapped one arm around Jackie. And there she stayed. Silent except for her sobs and sniffles.

Unsure of what to say, and even more unsure what to do Hyde began to stroke Jackie's hair and grinned even though there was no one to see it.

"If had known that was gonna shut you up I would've said it months ago."

* * *

_Point Place, Wisconsin_

_December 27, 1981_

Christmas had come and gone in Point Place. This year, Donna had put up a small tree in she and Eric's apartment. Mainly she had done it to make her Dad and Kitty happy. They were prone to uninvited visits and last year when there had been no tree you would've thought Donna was entertaining in the nude they made such a stink.

On the small couch she sat with Eric on one side and Fez on the other, the TV droning on in the background. It was pretty much the norm for the three: sitting and doing nothing in particular. But Donna couldn't take it anymore. The boredom, the uncomfortableness - all of it. It was driving her crazy.

"Let's do something tonight,_" _Donna smiled at Eric.

"We are doing something," was Eric's only response.

"Ooh, ooh," Fez hopped up and down on the couch. "I know. Let's go skiing."

"We don't know how to ski," Eric replied flatly.

"That's alright we don't know how to fly either but it never stopped Kelso from trying."

At the mention of their dead friend's name Donna felt Eric tense up next to her. It had become an unspoken rule between her and Eric that the names of Kelso, Hyde and Jackie not be mentioned. But the rule drove Fez to near insanity and he rarely abided by it. Eric turned to Fez and tried to hide the pain in his eyes with anger. "Why do you have to say his name all the time?" Eric questioned Fez.

"Why don't you say his name, _ever_?" Fez returned.

"Fez ..." Donna tried to cut him off, but Fez wouldn't be dissuaded.

"No, I am _sick_ of this. I can't ever talk about him. Or Hyde, or Jackie. Why do we have to pretend like they never existed?"

Eric stood up to leave, his one and only defense when the conversation turned in a direction he didn't like. "I'm outta here."

But this time Fez wasn't going to let him walk away. Fez stood up and faced his friend, "Eric, please, we can talk about them."

"I don't wanna talk about them, Fez."

With his most fierce expression, Fez continued, "Well _I_ do. Remember how we all went out on Bob's pontoon and Kelso forgot to tie the rope onto the anchor ..."

Eric sank back into the couch and closed his eyes but it couldn't stop the image from popping into his mind. He knew exactly what day Fez was talking about. "Stop," he barely whispered.

"So when he threw it in the water the anchor sunk to the bottom and Kelso was left holding the rope."

"Fez ..."

"And Hyde made him go in and dive for it. Even though the water was like a million cubes of ice."

In his mind's eye, Eric saw Kelso - treading water and yelling up at the boat that his balls had climbed up into his lower intestines and they were going to get tangled up with all the pizza he had eaten earlier in the day. A minuscule smile cracked Eric's face and Donna watched it with hopeful eyes.

Fez must've been encouraged by this, because he kept going. "So Hyde finally agreed to let him back on the boat and then he reached out his hand to pull Kelso in and Kelso yanked him down into the water."

At the memory, Donna started to laugh. It was a big laugh, the kind of which she hadn't used in years. "Oh my God, Hyde was so pissed that his magic 'fro got wet._"_

"You know," Fez began contemplatively, "Hyde really did have magnificent hair. It had so much body ..."

Fez kept talking but Eric was no longer listening. That day was the last time the six of them had been together before Kelso and Donna had left for California. He would never forget that day. It had been filled with burns and beer and laughter; the best kind of day. After they had finally gotten back to land, Hyde stuffed Kelso's shorts with pine cones, and Kelso, in turn stuck pine cones in Hyde's hair. He could even remember the smell of gasoline from the boat mingled with the distinctive smell of the joints they had smoked in the middle of the lake. Eric even remembered the song that had played in the car on the ride back to his house. It seemed he remembered every stupid detail of that day.

"Hotel California."

Both pairs of eyes turned to look at Eric as if they weren't quite sure the words had come from his mouth. But it was Donna who actually managed to speak. "What?"

Eric's eyes remained focused on something in the distance and his voice was low and calm. "It was playing in the Cruiser when we drove back to my house and Jackie wouldn't stop singing along with the music and Hyde threatened to hang her head out the window if she didn't shut up and then Kelso wanted us to strap him to the luggage rack so he could feel like he was driving in a convertible."

"Eric ..." Donna wanted to ask more but Eric kept talking.

"So Hyde made us roll down all the windows and then Jackie was pissed because she couldn't hear the music. So Fez started to sing the song to get her to shut up. Then Hyde got even more pissed because, well ... you know, Fez was singing."

"Oh my God, I don't even remember that. How did you ..."

But that was all he was willing to share. Like a hypnotized man who had been woken from his trance, Eric blinked his eyes and snapped back to the present day. Embarrassed that he had let Fez and Donna see him that way, Eric shook his head and stood up off the couch. "I'll, uh ... I'll see you guys later." And with that, Eric began to stride towards the front door; stopping only to grab his coat. Stunned into silence, Donna and Fez watched him go.

Standing outside his apartment, Eric took a deep breath. In the silent hallway, he could again be alone with his memories. Fez and Donna thought he didn't think about them - about Kelso and Hyde and Jackie. The truth was, he thought about them too much.

* * *

_Duluth, Minnesota_

_December 27, 1981_

"Are you supposed to be breathing like that?" Hyde asked his panting wife, while his eyes darted back and forth between her and the road.

"Steven, when _you_ push a baby out of your body, you can breathe however you want!"

The look in her eyes told Hyde that Jackie wasn't in the mood for playful banter. But either out of nervousness or out of his innate need to always win an argument, Hyde continued. "I just meant, it sounds like you're gonna hyperventilate."

"Well then, I guess it's a good thing we're on our way to the hospital," Jackie spat back, through clenched teeth.

He didn't mean to, but Hyde began to laugh. Big mistake. Jackie's eyes lit up like sticks up dynamite and she gazed death rays in Hyde's direction.

"Are you _laughing_ at me?"

Oh crap. Now they were going to need two rooms in the hospital. One for Jackie to give birth in, and one for Hyde to recuperate from the trauma to his shins. "No. I'm not laughing at you." The look on Jackie's face told Hyde she wasn't buying it. Some serious placating was in order. "Jackie, it's just crazy, you know? We're having a baby. That's frickin' insane. I...I just never thought..."

But before Hyde could finish his sentence, Jackie began to cry. And Hyde was left to sit and witness what was his biggest weakness - his girl crying. "Jackie, crap, I didn't mean anything. You can breathe however you want."

"It's...not...that..." Jackie sputtered out, a sob coming in-between each word.

"Then what's wrong?" Stupid question, Hyde chided himself. She's in labor, you idiot. "Does it really hurt that much?"

"No, I just," Jackie stopped her panting and instead, began to rub the bump that would soon be their baby. "I just really wish Mrs. Forman was here," avoiding Hyde's eyes, she continued. "And Donna. God, I really wish Donna was here."

Hyde nodded. He understood. It would've meant the world to him to have Red there, or Eric or Fez ... or Kelso. Someone to pace the waiting room with, someone to give a cigar to, someone to tell him, 'Congratulations, Dad.' But it couldn't be.

Jackie sniffled again and laid her head down in Hyde's lap. "And _yes_," she huffed. "It _does_ hurt that much."

* * *

_Duluth, Minnesota_

_March 16, 1982_

Jackie wrapped the blanket a little tighter around her small daughter and walked down the long and echoing aisles of the cathedral. She felt so stupid for coming here. But she really had no one else to talk to. She was feeling herself start to slip towards a place that she feared she wouldn't be able to escape from. It had started shortly after the baby was born. The guilt was back. She had dealt with it so well over the last five years. It had always been there, but she could cover it up - make it go away. Now, her usual tricks didn't work. She was angry at herself, angry at Hyde, disgusted with her perfect life. All the good things that she had, she couldn't enjoy any of them and Jackie was terrified she would miss the most precious months of her daughter's life if she didn't do something quick.

A conversation with Hyde was out of the question. He had fought his demons and won. Jackie couldn't burden him with hers. Besides, he would only blame himself and Jackie didn't want to risk Hyde retreating back behind his wall. Not when he had spent so many years standing in front of it.

So the next and really only place Jackie could think to come was a church. The thought had been ingrained in her head by Kitty over the years. When you need help - you go to church. Jackie had always believed when you need help you go to the salon, but maybe church was a more appropriate place to talk about what she wanted to talk about.

She knew there were these confessional thingys. You were supposed to get in them and a priest was sitting behind some kind of window and he would listen to you, but he couldn't see you. So she had dressed up her little girl and put her carefully in the car, and then she had come in search of one of these tiny rooms.

But now that she was here, she felt ridiculous. The priest was going to laugh at her, she was sure of it. Then he would tell her that she _should_ feel bad for what she had done to Kelso. Planting her feet, Jackie stopped moving and stood still as a statue, debating herself in her mind.

At that moment, a door to one of the secret rooms opened and out stepped a little old lady. She smiled at Jackie, and then gave the baby a smile. "Go ahead. I'm finished." The woman nodded towards the door and then waited for Jackie to go in.

'Now what do I do?' Jackie wondered to herself. She certainly couldn't run with this woman staring at her. So she mumbled some lame 'thank you' and stepped into the room.

Small didn't begin to describe it. Jackie had to hug the baby closer to her so they could both fit in the room. She was staring straight at some sort of screen and behind it she could make out the shape of a man. For what seemed like an hour, Jackie waited for the priest to begin and then a terrifying thought occurred to her: what if _she _was supposed to say something.

"Go ahead, my dear."

Oh great. She _was_ supposed to say something. Since lying to a priest was probably a bad idea, Jackie thought she'd just start with the truth. "I'm not really sure what I'm doing here. I'm not even Catholic. I'm not really anything."

"That's alright. I won't tell the Lord."

His voice sounded kind, and it gave Jackie courage so she continued. "I just needed to talk to someone. I can't talk to my husband because he'll just worry about me and then he'll get angry at himself because he'll think it's his fault. See, I did something horrible a long time ago."

"Yes ..." the priest waited for her to continue.

This was it. This was when she had to admit to what she'd done and then hope the priest didn't kick her out and tell her she was going to hell for sure. "I, um ... I killed someone."

Jackie could hear the man behind the screen shift uncomfortably on his seat. "I see. And how did you do this?"

"I, h-he and I were in love and he left me and I started dating his best friend. And when he found out, he just, he lost it and he was in a car accident, and ... oh my God," she hadn't planned on crying, but now there was no choice. Her shoulders began to shake and the baby stirred in her arms with the shuddering movements of Jackie's chest. "Oh my God, it's all my fault," she whispered as a single tear escaped her thick lashes and began to run down her cheek.

"So, you didn't actually kill him." there seemed to be a slight tinge of relief in the priest's voice. As if he was glad he wasn't sitting in a tiny box with some sort of axe murderer.

But to Jackie, what she had done was no different. "Yes, I did." She used the back of her hand to wipe the liquidy mess that had become her face.

"No, my child. You didn't."

Was the priest trying to argue with her? She had finally admitted to what she'd done and now he was contradicting her. Her voice got louder. "If it weren't for me, he'd be alive. How is that not killing him?" At the sound of Jackie's shrill voice, the baby stirred and instantly looking at her beautiful daughter brought on the guilt. "And now I have the best life, it's so perfect. I have the most incredible little girl that I love so much, and I love my husband. And he's a good man. But I don't deserve it. Any of it."

"Why would you think that?"

"Because if Michael's not here to live a life, then why should I get to?"

"That's precisely why you should. When God takes someone from us, we need to remember that person and honor that person."

He wasn't answering her question. "But why? Why am I here and he's not? What did I do to deserve all this when he's dead?"

"You're here because there is a plan for you, and for your life. And the way you can remember your friend is to live every day to its' fullest." The priest paused and leaned further forward in his seat so that now Jackie could hear his voice more clearly. "May I say something else?"

She shrugged and if it weren't for the screen the priest would get to witness the famous Jackie Hyde pout, "I don't know. I guess"

"You can't live a life with this much guilt. Not a _real_ life, anyway. You can, however, ask for forgiveness. Would you like to do that?"

"I don't know how to do that."

"That's why _I'm_ here."

Jackie had learned that nothing was ever that simple. "It sounds too easy. I just ask to be forgiven for being responsible for the first guy I ever loved dying - and _poof_ just like that everything's better?" Hyde was right, religion was a crock because what this guy was saying sounded asinine. "I'm sorry, but that's not gonna happen."

"It doesn't work that way. You have to be truly sorry for what you did, and you have to ask God for his forgiveness."

Of course she could ask for it. But why should she be granted it. Was God stupid? Didn't he know what she had done? "I don't deserve forgiveness."

"Everyone deserves forgiveness, my dear."

That wasn't true. She didn't. Not for what she had done. She was a fool to think coming here would help. Nothing would help, she would just have to deal with it. "I think I made a mistake, I'm sorry. I have to go." Quickly, Jackie began to try and stand up, but the room was so small she couldn't run out like she had hoped. Instead, she was momentarily trapped.

"You owe it to your daughter to at least try."

The thought stopped Jackie in her tracks. It was true. She owed it to the baby to be a whole person, a _happy _person. Not some lifeless shell who was chained to her guilt.

The priest must have sensed Jackie's change in mood because he continued. "Would you like to try?"

That was the question. Would she? Jackie looked down at the tiny bundle and watched as she breathed in and out. She was, to Jackie, complete perfection. For this baby, Jackie would do anything. Even the unthinkable - forgiving herself. The seconds ticked by and Jackie just watched the baby, breath after breath.

"Yes. I would."

* * *

_Duluth, Minnesota _

_April 12, 1984_

It had been a long day. And it was going to be an even longer night. But Fridays were when Hyde made his best tips, and he couldn't give them up. Since the baby had been born, their already meager funds were spent faster than Hyde could make them. He hated being away from Jackie and their little girl, but the money was too good to find a job with more reasonable hours. As he picked up his own dinner from the kitchen window, he headed to a bar stool. If he was lucky, he'd get to scarf down his burger before the happy hour crowd came in.

The sound of wind ripping through the bar as the door was opened quickly squashed that hope. "Crap," he muttered to no one but himself. Then, shoving his plate aside, he turned to face the customer that had interrupted his meal and was pleasantly surprised.

"You're not gonna make much money with that scowl on your face, Steven"

"People tip me more when I look like this," he teased his wife. "They're too afraid _not_ to tip me."

The squirming two year-old in Jackie's arms was inching closer and closer to her daddy and Hyde couldn't help but reach out and grab his daughter from Jackie's arms.

"Hi Daddy," she said with a smile spreading across her beautiful face.

"Hi angel," he answered back quietly while he gave her a kiss on the forehead.

"Boo boo," the little girl said pointing to her knee and giving Hyde such a perfect pout he swore Jackie was giving the baby lessons on technique.

"What did she do?" Hyde asked Jackie while he examined his little girl's knee.

"Oh, Steven, she's fine she just fell on the sidewalk."

Again, the baby shook her head and stuck her plump lip even further out. "Not fine. Boo boo. Kiss it, Daddy." she implored with a whine and the slightest tilt of her head.

Realizing he didn't stand a chance, Hyde simply accepted the inevitable and did as he was told.

Jackie bit her lip and tried not to laugh at the sight of Steven Hyde applying a kiss to a barely-there boo boo. Instead, she took back the little girl from her husband's arms and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Alright, tough guy, we've got errands to run."

Ignoring the barely veiled jab Hyde quickly grabbed onto Jackie's elbow to stop her from leaving. "Wait. What errands?"

"You know, the grocery store, the post office, the drug store ... unless you want to eat ramen noodles in the dark because I didn't pick up dinner or mail our electric bill."

Even after almost seven years of safety, Hyde never liked Jackie being out in the world without him. But they couldn't be together 24 hours a day. That is, without killing each other they couldn't. So all he could do was give her the same speech time and time again.

"Just do what you've gotta do and don't talk to anybody."

And all _Jackie_ could do was roll her eyes and act annoyed time and time again. "Oh, Steven, I'll be fine."

"Jackie, knock it off. Just call me when you get home."

She'd never admit it, but it felt good that he worried, still. So she always acted slightly put-out, but of course she wasn't. "Fine. And no flirting tonight with skanky college girls," she warned even though she knew it wasn't necessary.

"I can't help it. It's my bubbly personality. Chicks flock to me," Hyde dead-panned back.

With a roll of her eyes Jackie gave Hyde another kiss and then offered the baby to Hyde so the little girl could do the same. The squirming bundle puckered up her heart-shaped lips and gave her dad a noisy and wet smack on the mouth.

"Wuv you, Daddy."

Hyde stopped, suddenly shocked into immobility by a two year-old.

"Oh my God," Jackie gasped, covering her mouth. "She's never said that before."

The little girl clearly pleased with being the center of attention, smiled and glanced back and forth between her parents. There were milestones in every kid's life. The first steps, the first smile, the first words. But this was a "first" that had never occurred to Hyde. And it might have been his favorite "first".

Like any smart and precocious two year-old, Hyde and Jackie's daughter realized when she had done something impressive. So she did it again. "Wuv you, Daddy."

And again.

"Wuv you, Daddy."

Trying to keep his cool, Hyde teased, "Okay, now you're just showing off." The baby simply stared back at her father - clearly, she was waiting for some praise. Instead, Hyde crossed his eyes and blew a raspberry which elicited a huge belly laugh from the little girl and an even bigger one from her mom. As Jackie watched the interaction between Hyde and their daughter and a pang of guilt replaced her happiness. The feelings of self-hatred had lessened considerably, but remorse always seemed to pop up when she laughed too loudly. She hoped that maybe it helped keep her humble; remind her what she had.

One final look at Hyde and then Jackie shifted the baby onto her hip and headed towards the door. Guilt was easier to deal with when she could just drive and think. Reaching forward to push the door open, Jackie suddenly stopped and Hyde wondered if she had forgotten something. But she simply turned back around and smiled at the curly haired man that stood in front of her. "I love you, Steven."

Hyde grinned and nodded with satisfaction. He didn't need to say it back. She knew.

Not to be outdone by her mother, the baby smiled and yelled out as loud as her little lungs would let her. "Wuv you, Daddy!"

Jackie laughed and Hyde couldn't help but chuckle as his two girls headed out the door. The irony of life was not lost on him as he sat back down to finish his dinner. He'd gone almost his whole childhood without hearing anyone say those words to him. Now he had two girls who couldn't _stop_ saying it. And if it made them happy, he supposed he could put up with it.

* * *

_Point Place, Wisconsin _

_April 12, 1984_

Donna hated being poked and prodded by doctors. But somehow, this time she was welcomed the systematic search of her body. A simple thought ran through her mind as the doctor examined her.

'Please. Please.'

But as second after agonizing second passed and the doctor continued to move his various instruments up and down her belly, Donna realized he was searching for a sound they both knew he would not find.

"I'm so sorry, Donna."

Of course he was. He had said the same thing last time, too. Staring straight ahead, Donna didn't even blink. _Again_. It happened again. The second time she had let herself believe that she and Eric were finally going to have something in their lives that could bring happiness back, and she was let down again.

The doctor put a hand on Donna's leg, and gave her that condescending smile that Donna had seen from so many other doctors and nurses. "You can try again, you know."

Why did they always say that? As if another baby would make up for the two she'd lost. They all just wanted her to move on, never realizing that each time it happened, she lost another little bit of her heart.

"It's so common," the doctor continued, "almost fifty percent of women have miscarriages."

Was that supposed to make her feel better, because it didn't. It made her angry. She didn't like being lumped into some statistical category, it was bad enough she lay here on a table in a gaping hospital gown humiliated and exposed.

The sickeningly sweet smile was back. "Is there someone I can call for you?" The doctor stared at Donna, waiting for her answer.

Who could she call? She hadn't even told Eric she had been pregnant, thinking that it would be better to wait until she was sure this pregnancy would be different. Maybe she could call Kitty. But that would be followed by hours of tears and 'I'm so sorry's' and Donna was sure she couldn't take that right now. There was one person that popped into Donna's mind over and over...Jackie. What she wouldn't give to be able to call Jackie. But, of course, that was not possible. And so Donna was back to staring at the doctor's pity-coated face.

"No. There's no one you can call."

The doctor mumbled something about scheduling another appointment in a few weeks. But Donna was done listening. She just wanted to be left alone to get dressed and then exit the sterile room as quickly as possible.

Why did rooms seem smaller in hospitals? Didn't people who designed them understand that even people who were sick needed room. But she wasn't sick. She was just...broken. It was the only word she could think to describe herself. There was something wrong in her body, some part of her didn't work. And for someone who had always been proud of her body, she suddenly hated it. She just wanted things to stop betraying her. For once, it would be nice if something in her life could work.

Donna managed to get out of the doctor's office without shedding a tear. But then again, her tears had dried up years ago. To her, it seemed she had been given a pre-determined number and she had long since surpassed her alotment.

Walking towards her car in the very back of the hospital parking lot, Donna remembered a night so many years ago when she and Eric had walked through this same parking lot. It seemed every time she came to this hospital, another nightmare in her turbulent life began. Without thinking, Donna stopped and stood unmoving. There was nothing to go home to. Nothing but an empty house and way too many dirty dishes in the sink. Eric wouldn't be home from work until late that night. If she sat at home, she would just wallow in her grief. She was tired of grieving, tired of feeling anything at all. A desire to be numb overwhelmed her and her eyes began to wander, resting, finally, on a cab parked in front of the hospital.

With a quickened pace, she headed towards it. She would worry about getting her car later, now she had other things on her mind. Opening the door, she hopped into the back seat and looked out the window, avoiding the driver's eye.

"Where to?"

"A bar. The first one you see."

* * *


	8. Chapter 8

Okay, apparently people have stopped reviewing this story. Not sure why but it makes me sad. So please, cheer a zennie up - leave a review. And to those of you who did review thank you very much. Your reward is Hyde (or Jackie for you fellas out there) feeding you a big box of chocolates ;)

I own nothing, I'm just borrowing them and making a mess of their lives.

* * *

_1986_

_Somewhere near Point Place ..._

Is it still called going home after nine years? Hyde didn't know. But whatever you wanted to call it, it was fast approaching. Subconsciously, Hyde rubbed his thumb back and forth; tracing a circle on Jackie's knee. It was a good thing she was asleep or she would have yelled at him for wearing her skin off.

The trip had passed by rather uneventfully. Frost covered trees and glassed over lakes were the only sights to see and soon Hyde was the only person still awake in the car. He wasn't sure what emotion he felt as they neared closer and closer to their destination. It wasn't fear, it wasn't anger, mostly it was just overwhelming anticipation.

He had selected a hotel for them on the edge of town, just to be safe. It was unlikely that anyone in Point Place would recognize him or even remember him for that matter. The only people whose minds' he knew for certain he still occupied were Red and Kitty. But just in case, Hyde had brought along an incredibly half-assed disguise: a baseball hat. His original thought had been to wear sunglasses but then it occurred to him that sunglasses would probably make people _recognize_ him.

The person he was more concerned about was Jackie. She wasn't exactly known for being inconspicuous. True, she had learned to play down her attention-getting ways, but old habits die hard and she still loved to be the center of attention in any room. After having endured a half-hour lecture from Hyde about being careful in Point Place, Jackie had drifted off to sleep leaving Hyde with nothing but his own thoughts to keep him occupied. A dangerous situation, indeed. Because the more Hyde thought, the more his gut told him that coming back was a horrible mistake. But the thought of disappointing Red and Kitty seemed even worse so he tried to tell his inner voice to shut up and quickly turned up the radio to drown out the debate within his own mind.

_Contact_

_Is all it takes_

_To change your life, to lose your place and time_

Stealing a glance over his shoulder at his sleeping daughter, Hyde wondered how close he had come to missing out on all of this. Was it really just that one moment almost nine years ago that had brought him here, or would he and Jackie have made it here eventually. He liked to think they would have. But knowing his talent for fucking things up, there was a good chance he would've lost Jackie.

_Contact_

_Asleep or awake_

_Coming around you may wake up to find_

_Questions deep within your eyes_

_Now more than ever _

_You realize_

Hyde watched the person beside him sleep and couldn't help but think of that night in the hospital. He had been so close to walking out, so close to missing his life. To this day, he wasn't sure what had kept him there. Had it been Kitty's words, or the way Jackie looked or maybe it was Kelso, somehow reminding Hyde that he a promise to keep.

_And when you sense a change_

_And nothing feels the same_

_And all your dreams are strange_

_Love comes walkin' in_

Hyde didn't know why his friend had to die in order for Hyde to have this life, but he had discovered there were things that just didn't make any sense. Some things you just took without question; and Jackie was one of those things.

_Another world_

_Some other time_

_You lay your sanity on the line_

_Familiar faces, familiar sights_

_Reach back, remember, with all your might_

Point Place looked surreal. There were details about the town that he had forgotten, and then there were things he would never forget. But it didn't feel like he belonged there anymore. New stores and restaurants had been built. Stoplights stood where there had never been one. But one thing stayed the same - every street told a story, each building held a memory. But the memories now had a taint to them. Things took on a different color when you saw where the memories ended.

"Stop rubbing the skin off my leg."

Pulling himself back to the present, Hyde had to stop a moment and figure out if that was just another of the voices in his head or if Jackie had really woken up. But before he could turn to her, he felt nails scratching along his thigh followed by a lazy head dropping on his shoulder.

Before settling in, Jackie took a look into the back seat. Just watching her daughter breathe put a smile on Jackie's face.

"You realize she's gonna be awake all night, now, right?" Hyde asked with feigned irritation.

"Well, I could've kept her awake the whole ride by singing 'Old McDonald' with her," Jackie teased.

"Good call on not doing that," he nodded.

Silence returned to the car and Eddie Van Halen's guitar was the only sound that accompanied the last mile of the drive. They both pretended not to notice when Hyde passed over the street that lead to the Formans house. Why look down a street you can never travel again?

_Til we meet again some other day_

_Where silence speaks as loud as war_

_Earth returns to what is was before_

When you spend nearly every minute together with another person, you realize that there are times when silence is golden and there are times when silence is dangerous. And Jackie had the insight to realize that Hyde's mind was flooding him and she needed to put up some sort of levy. Reaching into her bag of tricks she pulled out one of her favorites: annoy him.

"You know, _I_ don't think Eddie Van Halen is all that amazing." stated Jackie, giving Hyde her best badass grin and a cocked eyebrow.

"Oh really? That's what you think, huh?"

"Absolutely," she nodded. "I mean, so he can play guitar. So what, right?"

"Whatever..."

"David Cassidy can play the guitar. And he has _much_ better hair than Eddie."

Hyde was well aware what she was doing, and he would've been somewhat grateful if he weren't so annoyed that she had actually compared Eddie to a Partridge "Jackie, you are so full of crap I can't even believe it."

With her best indignant pout, Jackie gave Hyde a slap on the knee. "Is that any way to talk to your wife?"

"That's the _only_ way to talk to you. Otherwise you get out of line."

Out of nowhere, a building appeared in the distance causing Jackie to forget about her mission to distract Hyde. "God, Steven, I think that's it," she pointed at the hotel in front of them.

It was bigger than Hyde had expected, which was good. A big hotel meant lots of faces and he and Jackie could just become one of them. "Remember what I said, okay?" Hyde asked. "Don't say a word. You let me check us in and you don't even look at anyone."

A nod was the only response he got. To Hyde, it felt like the car was on one of those conveyor belts that moved people along, because they kept moving forward but Hyde could've sworn he had stopped driving a mile ago. His hands crossed one over the other on the steering wheel and suddenly, the car was in the parking lot.

They were here.

Jackie pushed herself off of Hyde leaving his entire right side feeling cold. Then, he watched as she scooted towards her window and reached up to brush the glass, as if she were trying to touch Point Place, itself. "Park there," she told him indicating a spot removed from the other cars.

Hyde did as she had asked and then turned off the car, having no idea what to do next. "Now what?" He didn't know who he was asking, himself or Jackie. And apparently, she didn't either because she didn't answer him. Instead, she unbuckled her seat belt and left her seat, crawling across the gear shift to climb into Hyde's lap. He wrapped his arms around her neck and pulled her tightly against him.

"I guess ... we could get out of the car," came Jackie's quiet reply.

"Or, we could sit here and make out."

"_Steven."_ She laughed and playfully swatted at his chest. The instant the sound escaped her lips, she frowned and dropped her chin to her chest. She shouldn't have laughed.

As if he could read her mind, Hyde lifted her chin up so he could look her in the eyes. "Jackie, just because we're in Point Place doesn't mean you can't laugh."

She nodded and gave him the best smile she could muster. And for Hyde, it was enough to keep him from jumping out of the car and pounding the pavement with his bare hands like he wanted to. If he told her the way he really felt ... that it made him feel like his insides were being ripped out just to drive down the streets of Point Place; if he told her that, she'd never get out of the car. Instead, he went with the smirk. The smirk never failed him. It always covered up any deeper emotions he had.

"How about a rain check on that make out session?"

"Okay," she giggled quietly, trying not to wake the little girl so peacefully sleeping in the backseat.

Slowly, Hyde opened his door but it was Jackie that made the first move to exit the car; swinging her feet around to hang them out of the open door. But as she was about to set her feet down on the asphalt, Hyde held onto her for just a split second. Even though she never turned her head to look at him, she knew he was quickly scanning the parking lot looking for any sign of trouble before he would let her out of the car. When he was finished, he lifted Jackie up out of his lap and held onto her while he stood up. Closed tightly in Hyde's grasp, Jackie ran her hands up and down his arms as her feet dangled above Point Place. She loved his arms, they were so strong, and she could feel the lean muscles even through the sleeves of his thick jacket. At this moment, she definitely preferred being in his arms to being on the surface of Point Place. Her mind was silently begging Hyde not to set her down. Down wasn't safe. His arms were safe.

"You ready?"

She wasn't, but he didn't need to know that. She had to do this for him and for Red and Kitty. When she nodded a "yes" Hyde gently set her down.

_Contact_. Her feet had touched Point Place.

"I'm gonna grab the baby," Hyde said, as if he were letting Jackie know he wasn't going any further than the backseat of their car.

Hyde opened the door and reached in, unbuckling his daughter from her car seat. With the skill that only comes from five years of practice, Hyde lifted her out of the car without even waking her up. The little girl stayed in her deep sleep and simply flung her arms around her daddy and snuggled deep into the crook of his neck. She trusted him so completely. So did Jackie. And yet, at that moment, Steven Hyde didn't trust anything. Including his own decisions.

With a gentle whir, the wind picked up and Hyde wasn't sure if it was the cold or something more sinister that sent a chill down his spine.

* * *

Jackie and Hyde entered the lobby of the hotel hand in hand, the same way they entered any room they walked into over the past eight years. Hyde had gotten especially good at carrying his daughter in his left arm and holding onto Jackie with his right. They headed quickly towards the front desk, neither wanting to admit to the other they just wanted to get into a room with a door and four walls where no one could see them. 

But someone had seen them.

"Steven?"

If he hadn't recognized the voice, Hyde probably would've turned around with his fists ready to take care of whatever problem came their way. But he did recognize the voice.

It was Kitty, with Red at her side.

No one moved. No one spoke. They just stared at each other.

The Formans stared at the couple in front of them who had so abruptly exited Point Place. Then, they had been wild teenagers joined at the smart-ass comment. Now, they stood before them as adults, fingers interlaced as they held hands - and a sleeping child. No sunglasses, bad attitudes or pom-poms in sight.

"Is this your little girl?" Kitty asked, reaching out to touch the head full of long, brown curls.

"Yeah," Hyde managed to nod.

"She's beautiful." Kitty whispered.

And with that, Jackie began to feel the lump build in her throat. She knew what was coming next. Jackie smiled weakly and leaned into Hyde. As if she could sense she was being watched, Hyde and Jackie's little girl lifted her head from her father's chest and turned towards the hand that was stroking her hair.

"Hello, Michelle. I'm your Grandma Kitty"

* * *

**A/N **Some of you already knew this, but the title and lyrics in this story were taken from the Van Halen song, "Love Walks In". Lots of love to Eddie and the boys ;) 

Please drop a review. I would really, really appreciate it.

Also, some wonderful zennies over at fanforum have taken it upon themselves to make a new zen fanfic list. So go over there and add some so we can get a complete list of stories.


	9. Chapter 9

Wow. Thank you so much for all the reviews. Seriously, it was awesome. I thought people had stopped reading this and I'm thrilled to know you haven't. Thanks again to luvcali who is always, _always_ there when I'm about to go insane.

Just to let you know over at fanforum we are trying to put together a new list of zen fics. We need more people to add their choices so we can have a nice mix of stories. Go over to fanforum and visit the zennie thread. We don't bite. Well ... sometimes we do when we're talking about Danny. But we'll try and behave ourselves.

I own nothing, I'm just screwing with their lives for fun.

* * *

They sat in Hyde and Jackie's room, the five of them. Having so much to say to each other and no idea how to say it. So far they had managed to successfully avoid the topic of Red's health. It was obvious to all of them that Red didn't want to talk about it, and so the subject had been left alone. There were too many other things to talk about. But for some reason, they had no idea how to start.

Michelle sat on Kitty's lap and recited song after song for her new grandma. Kitty laughed and clapped with each verse of, "The Wheels On The Bus". Even Red, as hard as he tried to look annoyed, smiled at the beautiful little girl.

"Pretty cold in Duluth, isn't it?" Red asked Hyde. After all, when all else fails, talk about the weather.

"Pretty cold doesn't begin to describe it." Hyde scowled.

"Our super lake is frozen," nodded little Michelle, wide-eyed with sadness.

"Your _what_, sweetie?" asked Mrs. Forman.

"Our super lake."

"She means Lake Superior," Jackie smiled, running her hand absentmindedly up and down Hyde's leg. "You can see Lake Superior from her bedroom window."

"Oh, how fancy," Kitty grinned, nodding her approval to Hyde.

Hyde shrugged, nonchalantly. "Not really. Pretty much every house in Duluth has a view of the lake."

"Daddy says the lake's too damn big. It makes him crazy." Michelle reported to Red and Kitty with a grin that was an exact replica of Hyde's.

"_Steven_." Jackie scolded.

"What? It _does _make me crazy. We can't get to our own house because of all the morons trying to take a picture of a giant lake."

Jackie simply rolled her eyes and then laid her head down on Hyde's shoulder. It was then that Kitty realized since they had entered the hotel there had not been one second when Jackie and Hyde had not been touching each other. Not one. She stared in disbelief at the two adults who had replaced the children she loved so much.

"I can't believe how much you've both grown up." Mrs. Forman said, staring at Hyde and Jackie.

"I can't believe your damn sunglasses are finally gone." Red chuckled.

Hyde shifted nervously in his seat, not wanting to think about the moment he realized he had lost his old aviator shades. "Yeah, well, I got tired of it always being dark," he lied and moved his hand to circle Jackie's waist.

"Are you sure we can't take you out to eat? You've got to be hungry."

"No." Jackie hadn't meant to say it so quickly. But the word left her mouth before she could stop it. She smiled a weak apology to Kitty. But it wasn't necessary, there was nothing to apologize for. Kitty understood Jackie didn't want to risk running into anyone she knew.

"I think we'll just order a pizza or something." Hyde explained quietly.

"Pizza sounds good," Red added. "It's our treat."

"That's okay, Red. I got it."

"Steven, I'm paying for the pizza. Because then I get to pick what kind we get. Understood?"

"Understood."

Kitty smiled at the girl who had taken up residence on her lap. "Do you like pizza, Michelle?"

With a wide-eyed stare, the tiny girl nodded. "Uh-huh. But just cheese, no _begetables_."

"Just cheese, eh?" Red grinned. "How about sausage."

"What's sausage?" Michelle asked, squishing up her tiny nose at the sound of such a strange word.

"What's sausage?" Red glared at Hyde for raising a daughter who didn't know what sausage was. "In Wisconsin, sausage is like water, or bread."

"Or cheese." Kitty added quietly.

"What's Wisconsin?"

It wasn't supposed to be a sad question but it stopped the conversation that had taken so long to start. And now, they didn't know what they could talk about. Apparently, even the subject of pizza was going to be a difficult one.

* * *

After songs had been sung and stories had been read, Michelle had fallen asleep in Red's lap. The sight of his sleeping daughter in Red's arms made the whole trip worth it for Hyde.

"Red, I can put her in the bed," Hyde offered as he stood up to head towards Red.

"No, no," Red interrupted, "then she'll just wake up and start crying. And I don't enjoy the crying part of kids."

Kitty inwardly rolled her eyes at her husband. He was as transparent as a glass of Chardonnay. There was no way he was relinquishing his granddaughter.

Hyde seemed to understand and sat back down on one of the beds next to Jackie.

Kitty looked Hyde up and down; amazed at the difference in his appearance. Of course the hair was still the same, but almost everything else had changed. In her eyes, he looked so different from the boy she had kept in her memories all these years. "Steven, I can't get over how wonderful you look."

With a proud nod, Jackie grabbed hold of Hyde's bicep, possessively. "Steven boxes."

Noticing the shocked expression on Kitty's face, Hyde shrugged, nonchalantly, and Kitty couldn't tell if it was from modesty or embarrassment. "Turns out I have some anger issues," he stated, with his trademark smirk.

"Boxing's good for you." Red nodded in approval. "Take all your crap out on someone that's not your wife. That way you never go hungry."

"So, Steven, how do you like your job?" Kitty asked, hopefully, unsure if she was prying or just making conversation.

With a shrug, Hyde cleared his throat. "It's good, I guess. I mean, they let me buy a small percent of the place so now I'm not just a bartender, I'm one of the owners."

In Hyde's voice, Red was sure he heard a little embarrassment. Maybe Hyde felt being a bartender wasn't what Kitty and Red had in mind for their adopted son. "Steven, you work hard to support your family, and it's honest work. That's what's important."

Kitty smiled and gave Hyde a reassuring pat on the knee. "That's right. The world needs bartenders, too. A lot more than other silly jobs. Like, a lawyer, for example. How many times have I needed a lawyer in my life? Never. And how many times have I needed a bartender?"

"Kitty..." Red's voice trailed off but Kitty couldn't be stopped.

"_Lots_ of times, that's how many."

Hyde couldn't help but crack a smile. God, he'd missed them so much.

There were so many things Jackie wanted to know, but she was careful to avoid leading the conversation towards Eric and Donna; not wanting to upset Kitty more than anyone else. "How's Laurie?" Nothing got Kitty's mind distracted like talking about her troublesome daughter.

"Well she is just wonderful. _Wonderful_," she added for emphasis. "She owns her own little place in Madison. It's one of those," she paused and wrinkled up her nose, "what do you call it, Red?"

Red sighed, clearly this wasn't the first time he'd done this. "A tanning salon."

"That's it," Kitty nodded. "Isn't that the craziest thing you've ever heard? People pay money to pretend to be in the sun." And there it was, the infamous Kitty Forman laugh. But just as quickly as it began, Kitty clasped a hand over her mouth and shot an apologetic look towards Michelle. The little girl, however, remained fast asleep.

"And Fez?" Hyde asked, thoughtfully. "Where's Fez?"

"Oh we are so proud of Fez," Kitty smiled her cat-ate-the-canary grin while Red put on a frown.

"I wouldn't go _that_ far, Kitty."

But she ignored Red and kept going, full-steam ahead. "He went to school. And he didn't just _go_," she paused for emphasis, "he _graduated_. Can you believe that?"

"Wow," Jackie smiled, sincerely proud of their old friend. "What does he do?"

"Ooh, he's in _publishing_," Kitty added using her hands for dramatic flourish.

"Tell them what he publishes," Red smirked.

Her lips now pursed, Kitty cleared her throat and covered little Michelle's ears. "He publishes smutty novels. But they're the nice, fancy dirty books - with pretty pictures on the cover."

"I always thought Fez would end up in the skin business," Hyde chuckled. "But I kinda thought he'd be selling candy at the X-rated theatre."

"Well, he went to school in Minneapolis. And we were all sure he'd come back, but he stuck it out. You know, I think he just wanted to get out of Point Place after ..." Kitty stopped. She hadn't meant to bring the conversation there.

Hyde seemed to pull into himself a little and he nodded, "Yeah... _after._"

There seemed to be no way around it. All roads lead to Rome, so it would seem ... and all dialogue lead them back to this place. The place Hyde and Jackie had fled years ago.

If there was one thing Hyde wasn't, it was a coward. And skirting around the subject no one wanted to talk about but controlled all their minds felt cowardly. It had never mattered much to Hyde what other people thought of him. But he had to know that Red and Kitty believed him. So he took a leap.

"I just ... I just wanted you two to know," Hyde continued, making sure he looked Red square in the eye. "I didn't do any of the things they said I did."

Funny how he felt lighter after the words left his mouth. But the weight he had carried had know been transferred to the air around him as he waited for a response. A question had been laid at Red and Kitty's feet and all Hyde could do was hold his breath. He realized by asking the Formans to acknowledge what he said was true, they would have to also acknowledge that Eric had lied. But to Hyde, it was a question he had to ask. Because _believing_ the Formans thought he was a liar was worse than _knowing _they thought he was.

The room seemed to stand still and Hyde was acutely aware of Jackie grabbing a tighter hold on his arm. There was no noise; just a sentence hanging in the air - waiting.

There was nothing Kitty could bring herself to say. Any response seemed like a betrayal to one of her boys. In her heart, she had always known Eric had lied. But if she didn't say it out loud, it didn't quite feel real. But Hyde deserved an answer, and she wanted to give him one. But when she opened her mouth, no sound would come out.

With a sigh that finally betrayed how physically and emotionally spent he was, Red looked up at Hyde and gave him a simple nod.

"We know, Steven."

* * *

Kitty and Red Forman made their drive home in almost complete silence. As if talking about the reunion that had just taken place would break the spell and they would come to realize it had all just been some figment of their imagination.

As they approached the last mile of their drive, Kitty reached across the car to take her husband's hand in hers and she said the only thing she could think of. "They're so different, Red."

"What did you expect, Kitty? It's been almost nine years."

Red turned the car onto Main Street skidding slightly on a patch of ice and Kitty sighed, so deep in thought she didn't even notice they almost hit a stop sign.

"I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't that. When two teenagers run away you certainly don't expect them to mature into what Jackie and Steven have become."

"I'm proud of them." Red stated, simply and honestly.

"Oh, Red." Kitty smiled at her husband.

"They were dealt a bad hand, Kitty. And they picked themselves up out of the mess and they made something with their lives. There's no way those two have had an easy life these past years."

"Isn't Michelle just the most beautiful little girl you've ever seen?" Kitty's eyes began to fill up with tears just thinking about the precious little girl who had been named after Michael Kelso. It seemed too cruel that Kitty finally got to meet her, only to say good-bye to her in a day.

"Why do they have to go back to Minnesota? They need to stay _here_. This is their home."

"Kitty," Red spoke as gently as he could, "this isn't their home anymore. And they took a big risk in coming here." Red couldn't help but feel guilty about the fact that they had come to see him, and though he would miss them when they left he would be satisfied in the thought that they were safe.

"It's just ... if Eric and Donna could just see how happy Steven and Jackie are ..."

"Stop right there, Kitty. This is something you can't fix. How many times have you tried to talk to Eric about this? It's over. Let it go." It seemed to Red they had this conversation almost daily and he was amazed that Kitty could hold onto hope even after all these years.

"I was thinking tonight when I was watching them ..." she paused unsure of how to say what she wanted to say without sounding cruel. "I was thinking about how different Steven and Jackie are from Eric and Donna."

There. It sounded awful, but they both knew it was the truth. Eric and Donna carried a heaviness in their hearts that had been caused by eight years of anger and bitterness. Their inability to forgive Hyde and Jackie was weighing them down and Kitty feared that one day, it would drown them.

Jackie had a light in her eyes when she looked at Hyde. And Hyde, the boy that Kitty was sure would end up alone and angry at the world, he held onto Jackie as if he needed to touch some part of her just to exist.

Kitty knew Eric and Donna loved each other, but she worried that they had so much hate in their hearts it left little room for much else. They had both spent so much time and energy over the years despising Jackie and Hyde that it had given them a hardness no one their age should have to bear.

When Kitty watched Hyde with Jackie she saw two people who existed on their love for each other and their love for their daughter. When she watched Eric with Donna she saw people who had hated for so long, _hate _had become what they existed for.

* * *

Jackie and Hyde lay together, arms and legs entwined, in their hotel room bed. It sometimes still amazed Hyde that he could only sleep when Jackie was in his arms. If he woke up and they had somehow managed to separate from each other, Hyde would run a tired hand across the bed until he found his tiny wife and then he would pull her back to him. And when he knew she was back in the safety of his hold on her, he would succumb to sleep again.

"I never really realized how much I missed Mrs. Forman until tonight." Jackie spoke the words quietly as she ran her fingers through the hair on Hyde's bare chest. The room glowed, dimly lit by the bathroom light left on in the distance and for the hundredth time Hyde turned his head towards the bed next to theirs' to look at the tiny girl that occupied it.

"Steven, she's fine."

"I know she's fine." Hyde said, pulling the blanket up around he and Jackie. "She really loved Red and Mrs. Forman, huh?"

Jackie smiled sadly, wishing her little girl could spend more time with the only grandparents she would ever have. "Yeah. I think she really did." Sleep was close to claiming Jackie, but she found herself searching Hyde's face in the near-dark room looking for an aswer. "Steven, are you glad we came back?"

"I guess ... I mean I'm glad we saw Red and Mrs. Forman. All the other crap in this town doesn't really matter. It hasn't mattered for years."

It seemed such a crazy thing to say, but it was true. They had so long ago forgiven Eric and Donna; and with that forgiveness came a peace. Jackie was still cursed with nightmares of a day she never remembered, but the nightmares left behind only fear. Never hate. And fear, she could handle.

"We did the right thing, Steven." Jackie whispered, scooting up a little as she placed her head on his pillow. Their faces only inches apart, she looked into his eyes and smiled tenderly at him. "Thank you."

"For what?" Hyde asked, running a hand through Jackie's long curls as his eyes started to drift closed.

"For making me feel safe."

At the word "safe" Hyde's eyes opened back up and he looked at the girl he held on to. "Jackie, you never need to be scared. You and Michelle ..." The words seemed so ridiculous in his head, but she needed to hear them. If for no other reason than it made him believe they were real. "To keep you two safe ... there's not a god damn thing I wouldn't do."

And there wasn't. Hyde only hoped he could get them out of Point Place without having to prove it to her.

* * *

Donna took a long drag off of her cigarette and held the smoke in, letting it fill her lungs. She kept her mouth closed and blew the smoke out her nose, getting a masochistic sense of pleasure from the burn it left behind. Pain reminded her she could still feel. She turned slightly to her right and stared at Eric's naked back. He always slept so far away from her. He used to sleep right next to her, practically on top of her.

He used to do a lot of things.

God, she missed him.

And Jackie. And Hyde. She hated herself for it, but she missed them every day.

It wasn't all his fault, she used to be different too. She wished she could remember the exact moment they had stopped doing the things they used to do to make each other smile. Like, when had he stopped holding her hand? And when had she stopped rubbing his leg as they rode in the car? If she knew the exact days these things had happened, maybe she could go back in time and fix things. There were so many things, where the hell would she start?

Would she start with the last time she saw Jackie and Hyde? What could she possibly do differently? She couldn't forgive them. She may have been able to if she wasn't haunted by the searing image of a bloodied and lifeless Kelso. In her highest moments she wondered what their lives would be like if they had just forgiven Jackie and Hyde. Would she still feel like she was suffocating with every breath she took? Would forgiveness lift the weight that pulled on her soul?

And then there were the days she allowed herself to imagine Kelso had never died. She loved those days. She could pretend that she and Eric had their dream jobs and had gone to college. Jackie and Hyde lived in Point Place, close enough so Kitty and Red still had them over for breakfast every morning. Fez and Kelso ran a candy store together and employed the best looking women in Point Place. They were all still best friends. Their lives were full and happy and she and Eric were more in love than they had ever been. But then, the real world would come back, and Donna was left feeling worse for having let herself pretend.

Sometimes she thought that she and Eric might as well have been in that van with Kelso because so much of them died that day. She'd lost three best friends and if she was honest with herself, she'd probably lost Eric in that moment too. They'd never been the same since that day. She had hoped marriage would bring them back to life and for a while it did. But after her miscarriage, Eric pulled back from her even further then before. She never even told him about the second baby. He wouldn't have been able to handle it.

She took one last drag on her cigarette and then tossed it into the ash tray on her night stand along with all the others. She grabbed the bottle of beer next to her and took one sip, then another. The fact that the beer was warm was inconsequential. She had stopped drinking beer just for the taste of it years ago. Now, she drank it just to make the days so faster. Again, she glanced at Eric's side of the bed, this time looking past his sleeping form to count the empty beer bottles on his night stand.

"Huh." she muttered to herself. Four beers. And that's just what he drank while they had lain in bed watching TV. She knew what she and Eric had become and she wondered if Jackie and Hyde had done any better.

She wondered if Jackie and Hyde were married or if they were even still together. She wondered where the hell they were. She wondered if they hated her and Eric. And if they did, did it eat away at them like it had eaten away at her. The anger and the hatred filled the hole in her heart. The hole where Eric used to be, and Kelso, and Jackie, and Hyde. The hole was so big, she needed an enormous amount of hate to fill it up. And Donna was terrified that if she ever let go of the hatred, the emptiness in her heart would be too much for her to stand. So she kept the hatred ... it was just better that way. Better to have a heart full of pain, then a heart full of emptiness.

So there they lay. The remains of a love. The remains of two lives. Two people unable to forgive, unable to forget.

She wondered if Hyde slept so far away from Jackie.

* * *

A shirtless rock lifter to anyone who reviews ;)

Sorry. Guess you had to be there. We're naughty girls over at fanforum

Oh and if you're only going to review to tell me how mean I am to E/D, please don't. I'm already aware of that. But there is a purpose to it, I swear.


	10. Chapter 10

I own nothing. I'm just borrowing them.

Some language. You've been warned.

This chapter is dedicated to three of the best Zennies in the world: luvcali, kayjay and casper. I don't quite understand the obsession with always being nice when it comes to the couple you love. We're Zennies, it's not in our nature to be nice. We're bad asses, remember. And frankly, after the way we were screwed by the writers I think we deserve to be angry. So I would just like to say we got screwed by the writers, we got screwed by other "fans" of T7S and I'm not going to play nice and kiss ass anymore. And if you want to leave me a review just to blow off some frustrated Zennie steam, I don't mind. Feel free to post how pissed you are for what happened to our couple or just post how much you hated Jackie and Fez. Whatever. And if you want to post how much you hate me or my story or Jackie and Hyde because it makes you feel cool, go ahead. Like Captain Jack Sparrow says, "sticks and stones, love."

* * *

It had gone by too quickly. The end of their second day in Point Place was approaching and Jackie and Hyde once again found themselves saying goodbye to Red and Kitty in the small hotel room. They stood, facing one another; Jackie holding onto Michelle and Kitty clutching at Red's hand. 

"Now, you _promise_ you won't leave without saying goodbye?" Kitty implored Hyde, not bothering to wipe the tears that had formed in her eyes.

All Hyde could do was nod. "I _promise_, we'll see you tomorrow."

"Alright," Kitty smiled sadly. "Let me have this precious girl," she asked Jackie, reaching her arms out towards Michelle.

The baby, in turn, reached out her arms hungrily towards Kitty; repeatedly opening and closing her little fists. Jackie giggled at her daughter and gave her over to Kitty. Watching the scene with a bittersweet grin, Hyde felt a nudge in his ribcage. He turned to see Red standing next to him gesturing towards the corner of the room with his head. Without hesitation, Hyde followed Red until they were out of earshot of the women.

"Steven," Red began tentatively, "there's something we need to talk about."

Out of nervous habit, Hyde cleared his throat and quickly glanced at Red's eyes, then just as quickly looked away. "Sure, Red. Yeah, anything."

"If something ..." Red's voice trailed off and he found himself swallowing hard. "If something happens to me, I want you to promise me you'll bring Kitty to Duluth with you and Jackie and Michelle."

It hit Hyde like a ton of bricks. Not only was Red talking about dying, but he was asking Hyde to look after the person most important in the world to him - his wife. It was an honor felt he didn't deserve. "Red. Why me? Why _us_, I mean, after what we did." What he really meant was - why not _Eric._

As if Red could read his mind, he continued, "If I'm gone, I don't know if Eric will be able to ..." For a man who hated talking about emotions, this was a nearly impossible conversation to have. But Red couldn't put it off any longer. "Eric hasn't been the same since Kelso died. He's not dealing with all this," Red sighed and Hyde couldn't tell if it was out of frustration or sadness, "all this cancer crap very well."

Hyde felt a pit beginning to grow in his stomach. He could only imagine how Eric felt. To Eric, it was just one more person in his life he was losing. It seemed incredibly unfair. And despite what had taken place between the two of them, Hyde couldn't hate Eric. "Yeah. Yeah, whatever you want, Red. But, you're gonna be okay, I mean ... right?"

With typical Red Forman gruff, he gave Hyde an indignant snort. "Of course I'm going to be okay. Do you think God wants me up there in heaven pissing everyone off? He's going to leave me down here as long as he possibly can."

Hyde couldn't stop the chuckle that escaped from his lips. Red's expression suddenly softened and Hyde turned to see that Kitty was standing behind him.

"Is everything okay?" she asked, looking back and forth between the two men.

"Everything's fine, sweetheart," Red nodded before turning to Hyde with a conspiratorial glance and then gently guiding Kitty towards the door.

Stealing one last glance over her shoulder at Michelle, Kitty blew the little girl a kiss goodbye. The giggling toddler reached out to grab the imaginary kiss from the air, and then proceeded to slap it on her cheek. Jackie had to turn away before Michelle could see her tears, but they didn't go unnoticed by Hyde. He ground his teeth together until his jaw ached. Things shouldn't be this way. Michelle deserved to know Red and Kitty. He and Jackie deserved to have people to call "family". 'But then again,' his guilty mind reminded him, 'Kelso deserves to be alive.'

"We'll see you tomorrow," was all Kitty could bring herself to say.

"Yeah," Hyde smirked, calling upon every ounce of Zen he had left. "_Tomorrow_."

* * *

The small family sat around a wobbly hotel room table eating delivered pizza for what seemed like the one hundreth time in a row. Jackie and Hyde chewed in silence, but the little girl who had not yet learned that there were some things in life better left unsaid, pushed her pizza around on her plate and pouted. 

"Why can't we take Grandpa Red and Grandma Kitty home with us?" Michelle asked with innocence in her huge blue eyes.

"You can take them with you in your heart, baby girl," Jackie smiled as she brushed a finger across her daughter's cheek.

Hyde pushed his plate across the table harder then he meant to sending it careening down towards the floor. He knew a tantrum was coming from his daughter, but part of him felt he might have one first.

"I don't wanna go. I _stay._" Michelle whined and stuck her plump lower lip out as far as it could do.

"Michelle," Jackie began, "we _can't_ stay. We have to go home."

"No! _Stay_." She stomped for emphasis.

Jackie turned to Hyde, her eyes pleading with him to help. But Hyde could do nothing, the anger was bubbling up in him and the hotel room began to feel like a prison. A prison whose walls were closing in on him.

"I gotta get out of here." Hyde stated flatly as he grabbed Michelle and hoisted her up onto his hip.

"What? Steven, where are we supposed to go?"

Without looking back at Jackie, Hyde started towards the door. "Anywhere but here."

* * *

The snow was falling fast and it was falling thick. It took the windshield wipers on high speed to keep the glass clear. And even then, it was hard to see through the white flakes that rained down on Donna and Eric's car. 

Donna took one hand off of the wheel to rub her eyes in a feeble attempt to help her focus on the road. She knew she'd had too much to drink, but she was more sober than Eric. And that was usually how they decided who drove. It wasn't who was sober, it was - who's less drunk.

"Stop at the liquor store, I wanna pick up some beer." Eric said, pointing out the window.

Without questioning, Donna simply turned the car in the direction of Eric's finger. Barely waiting until the car stopped, Eric flung his door opened and stepped out into the night.

"Get me some cigarettes, too." Donna called after him as he trudged his way through the snow. Eric threw one hand over his shoulder in a half-hearted wave that signified he had heard her.

Watching him go, Donna's lips drew out into a small smile. He'd actually been in a pretty good mood at the bar tonight. They'd joked a little about their respective crappy jobs. Eric at Price Mart and Donna at the radio station. The fact that they both worked the same jobs they had in high school wasn't lost on either of them. Both had been passed over for promotions more times than they could count. But, the fact that they even had jobs, considering how many times they had called in sick or showed up still drunk from the previous night's partying, was amazing.

Suddenly feeling cold as hell now that the car and the heat were off, Donna reached into the glove box and pulled out a bottle of brandy. It was their, "in case we break down" bottle. If they were stranded in a snowbank somewhere, at least they'd have something to do.

She opened the bottle and took a long pull off of it. It used to burn all the way down when she drank hard liquor. Now, there was nothing.

"Aw crap." She muttered to herself. She had forgotten to tell Eric to pick up some wine. Her dad was coming over tomorrow. Clutching her brandy bottle, Donna exited the car slamming the door behind her. As she walked towards the store, a family out for a walk in the park across the street caught her eye. She shook her head. "Morons." That was something Jackie had loved to do, take a walk in the snow. Stupid and pointless. Donna's preferred activity in the snow was brandy and a smoke. She stared at the family in disgust and reached for her cigarettes.

* * *

Free from their plainly decorated and somewhat tacky hotel room, Hyde felt like he could finally breathe. He tried to put aside thoughts of a world without Red Forman, he tried to forget about Eric and Donna; about Kelso. Steven Hyde just wanted a minute of peace; a _second_ - if that was all he could get. A life in hiding had made him tired, and it seemed like eight years had finally caught up with him because he was completely exhausted. He stood in the middle of a park, one he had played in with Eric and Kelso almost his entire childhood, and he let the snow fall on his body. 

"Isn't it beautiful, Steven?" Jackie asked tilting her head back and letting the flakes hit her on the face.

Michelle giggled at her mommy and even Hyde couldn't help but smirk at Jackie. Her dark hair covered in white specs and her face damp from the melted snowflakes. She looked so beautiful; an angel in the snow. Or the devil. Sometimes he wasn't sure which.

Jackie straightened her head back up and smiled at Hyde. She could see the way his eyes darted back and forth, looking. She crossed towards him lifting her feet up as she trudged through the thick snow. "It's a cold, snowy night in a park, Steven. Who in the world are we gonna see out here?" She gave Hyde her best teasing smile to let him know he needed to relax a little bit. Taking the hint, Hyde grabbed Michelle's tiny, little hand.

"You wanna go for a walk, angel?" he asked the little girl with a smirk.

"I'm gonna throw a snowball at you, Daddy," she smiled.

"Oh ya think so, huh?" Hyde chuckled. "Why don't you throw one at your mom since this little park stop was her idea." Jackie cocked an eyebrow at Hyde and grabbed his hand pulling herself in closer towards him.

"Because, it's funny to throw snow at you, Daddy. It gets stuck in your hair."

Jackie laughed and Hyde did his best to look annoyed at being dragged through the snow by two girls who were determined to white-wash his magic 'fro.

"Are we done with the nature walk yet, doll?" he asked Jackie with his best scowl. Just then, Michelle dropped Hyde's hand and ran a few feet in front of them, reaching down to fill her mittens with snow. She proceeded to spin around and throw it all at Hyde, covering his face and, of course, his hair.

"Yeah, " Jackie nodded with a grin as she took in the sight of a snow soaked Hyde, "I think we're done, now."

"You think that's funny?"

"Steven, I _know_ that's funny." she nodded and tried not to laugh too hard as Hyde shook his head, trying to free the trapped snow flakes.

"See," Michelle grinned proudly as she pointed at her daddy's head, "stuck."

Hyde sprinted towards his little girl gathering her up in his arms and tossing her in the air as she squealed.

"Do it again, Daddy! Again!"

Hyde smiled and leaned in to whisper into Michelle's ear. She covered her mouth with her mittened hands and giggled as she nodded. Hyde and Michelle both turned to look at Jackie.

"Don't even _think_ about it." Jackie cautioned, knowing what they were plotting. She decided a preemptive strike was her best bet so she reached down and grabbed her own handful of snow running towards Hyde to toss it in his face.

"Now you're gonna get it." Hyde called after Jackie as she ran in the opposite direction laughing the whole time. "Hold on, angel" Hyde winked at his daughter and she squealed again, clutching onto her father's arm. They took off running and reached Jackie quickly.

"Don't you dare, Steven!" she called over her shoulder, but it was too late. Without even stopping, Hyde scooped up Jackie with his free hand and ran with her underneath his arm.

"We got you, Mommy!"

Hyde ran along holding onto both of them, Michelle giggling and Jackie protesting to be put down. The further he ran the less Jackie protested and the more the toddler giggled. Finally, when he was pretty sure he was going to run into a tree if he kept going Hyde stopped and put a wiggling and out-of-breath Jackie back on the ground.

"Alright, things are startin' to freeze. Things I use _a lot_, if you know what I mean" Hyde smirked.

"Are you cold, baby?" Jackie purred at Hyde, inching closer towards him. She threw her arms around his neck and leaned into him. Giving him a smile that threatened to melt the snow beneath their feet, she began kissing him gently on the mouth.

Fatigue gone, he grinned against her lips and pulled her in closer towards him. "Not anymore."

* * *

Coming back out from the liquor store Donna was irritated to find the family that had caught her eye earlier was still there. She watched as they walked hand in hand through the snow. Another pull off of her brandy bottle seemed to lift the fog from her brain momentarily and she tried to focus in a little better on the threesome in the park. 

There was something about them. Something that kept her staring at them. She felt as if every force in the universe was pulling her towards them. So she walked closer and closer, closing the distance between herself and the mysterious group. The little girl was so beautiful, she was probably the most beautiful child Donna had ever seen. Donna watched as the girl grabbed a handful of snow and ran towards her dad, tossing it in his face. Then, the father turned towards the little girl and scooped her up in his arms, throwing her into the air. It was only then that Donna could see the man's face. The beard was gone, the sideburns were practically unnoticeable and there were no sunglasses. But it was Hyde.

"Holy shit."

Donna stood frozen in the middle of the street. It couldn't be. It just wasn't possible. He couldn't be here, there was no way in hell the person standing fifty feet from her was Hyde. Donna was staring at him with morbid fascination and she let out an audible cry when the woman turned around and Donna could see that it was Jackie. She ran towards Hyde and the little girl in his arms. Donna watched as Jackie threw a handful of snow at Hyde and then took off running in the opposite direction. She could see Hyde's mouth moving, and although Donna couldn't hear what he was saying, she could tell he was laughing. He shifted the little girl over to one side and then took off, running, towards Jackie. When he finally reached her, he lifted her up with his free arm and carried her under his arm like a football.

She could hear Jackie's laughter.

And as Donna watched the perfect family playing in the snow her blood began to boil. _'_How_ dare_ they,' she thought. How dare they be happy. It didn't make any sense. What in the hell were they doing here? They had no right to be here. Donna didn't even realize she was still standing in the middle of the street until she heard the high-pitched beep of a horn. She shook her head to lift the fog of booze and anger and stumbled back onto the sidewalk outside of the liquor store, never once taking her eyes off of Jackie and Hyde.

As Eric swung the door open and walked quickly outside he ran smack into Donna almost knocking both of them down. "Jesus, Donna. Good place to stand."

Donna was staring off into the distance, mesmerized by something. Eric followed her gaze and his eyes tried desperately to focus on what it was she was so interested in. The liquor had taken hold of Eric's vision and it seemed almost impossible to un-cross his eyes, but he could see a family in the park across the street having, what appeared to be, a snow ball fight.

"You wanna go join 'em?" Eric asked with a sarcastic bite.

It was then that Donna's head snapped back to look at Eric and he realized her eyes were on fire. "Look at them, Eric. _Look hard._"

"Who gives a shit, let's get in the car. I'm freezing my ass off out here."

Donna took Eric's face violently in her hands and tried to hold it steady allowing him a chance to watch the family in the snow. "Try to forget how shit-faced you are and just look." Donna was holding onto Eric's face so tightly he reached up to pull her hands away. And then he stopped.

"Son of a bitch," was all he could think to say.

It was Jackie and Hyde, and a little girl. "Damn," he muttered, "they have a kid." He almost smiled at the thought but Donna's voice snapped him out of it.

"What the hell are we gonna do, Eric?"

Eric sighed. He had played this moment out in his head so many times over the past eight years. But never in all the scenarios he had thought about, never had Jackie and Hyde looked so happy. Eric had always assumed Jackie and Hyde had ended up like he and Donna - bitter and angry at what life had done to them. But, as he watched them now, Hyde carefully setting Jackie down and Jackie reaching up to throw her arms around his neck and cover his face with kisses, Eric realized he couldn't have been more wrong about what Jackie and Hyde had become. And he wasn't sure what made him angrier. Knowing they were in Point Place, or knowing they were happy. Suddenly, Eric was just too tired and too drunk to even care.

"We're not gonna do a thing. We're gonna get in the car, and drive home and drink every single one of these god damned beers."

Donna shot him a deadly glare and hissed at him. "You go ahead and do that." And without even waiting for Eric to respond she headed out into the street and walked at a furious pace towards Jackie and Hyde. There was nothing for Eric to do but follow.

As Donna got closer she could see that Jackie and Hyde were locked tightly together, kissing each other more tenderly than Donna would have thought either of them capable of. Hyde held onto the little girl on his left side and ran his right hand up and down Jackie's back. To Donna they looked like something out of a movie, the image of the perfect family. She quickened her pace wanting to reach them before they broke apart and noticed she and Eric heading towards them.

When Donna finally stood within a few feet of Jackie and Hyde, she stopped. What was she going to say to them? She wished she hadn't drank so hard today, she couldn't seem to form a sentence that conveyed how much she despised Jackie and Hyde as they stood there, loving each other, in the snow. So Donna did the first thing she thought of. She tightened her grip around the bottle of brandy she still clutched in her hand and she hurled it at the nearest tree.

The sound of shattering glass was covered up by the sound of Jackie's scream. Immediately Hyde and Jackie broke apart. And before Hyde could even see where the noise had come from he tucked his daughter's head under his chin, sheltering her from whatever was out there. Next he pulled Jackie tightly to him and she buried her head in his chest. Hyde didn't have to look far to find the source of the chaos. Before him for the first time in eight years, were Eric and Donna.

Acting quickly and calmly, he handed Michelle to Jackie and then gave both of them a gentle shove to move them behind him, placing his body between Eric and Donna and Jackie and his daughter.

"What in the _HELL_ are you doing here_?" _Donna screamed at the top of her lungs.

By this time, Eric had reached her side. The two of them were close enough that Hyde could smell the booze literally permeating the air around Eric and Donna. Hyde was completely bowled over at how terrible the two of them looked. 'What in the hell had happened to them?' was all he could think. They looked about ten years older then they should've and their faces were hard and hollow. His daughter's soft sobs brought Hyde back to reality and he turned to cup Jackie's face into his hands.

"I want you to get in the car and you stay there, do you understand me?" Hyde rubbed his thumbs along Jackie's jaw as he held her face, trying to calm her. It seemed to work, as she kept her eyes glued to Hyde's.

Jackie nodded quickly and squeezed Michelle a little tighter. Giving Hyde the quickest of kisses she turned and then ran through the snow towards the car.

Donna called, angrily, after her. "Jackie ... Jackie, stop!"

Jackie never once turned to look back. She opened the car door and set Michelle carefully inside and then climbed in after her, quickly pulling the door shut. The fact that she had been ignored seemed to only feed Donna's anger and she took off in the direction of the Hydes' car. Before she had even moved a foot, Hyde was in her path.

"Donna, I swear to God if you take one step closer ..." Hyde spoke so quietly and calmly it unnerved Donna. Yelling and screaming she understood, the calm - she didn't.

Standing so close to Hyde for the first time in so long, Donna was amazed at how good he looked. He looked fit and strong and he carried himself a little taller then she had remembered. There were no sunglasses masking his eyes, there was no Zen in his expression. He looked confident, sure of himself. Everything she knew she and Eric no longer conveyed. It made her hate him more.

Eric could tell Hyde meant what he said, so he grabbed Donna's arm and tried to pull her back. A sober Eric couldn't fight Hyde. There was no way a drunk Eric would be able to. And although Donna had a fondness for violence Eric just didn't care enough about Hyde to try and bash his face in. Especially when it was so painfully obvious to Eric that he would fail. Hyde had always been bigger and stronger than Eric. But now the difference between the two of them was even more noticeable. Hyde's body seemed to be built to kick ass. Eric's body looked beaten-down and tired. A fight would only end badly for Eric.

Perhaps Donna realized the same thing because she stopped her march towards Jackie and let herself be pulled back towards Eric. Why had they come here? She couldn't even think straight. She yanked off her glove and reached into her pocket grabbing out her cigarettes. With trembling hands she pulled one out of the box and lit it. Hyde stared at her the entire time, waiting for her to speak. When all she did was take a long drag on her cigarette, Hyde spoke instead.

"We're only here for the night and then we're leaving. So how about we just pretend we never saw each other and we can all just go back to our lives."

Eric was so drunk and so God damn cold he wanted to agree; but Donna wouldn't walk away so easily.

"Go back to our lives, Hyde? What about Kelso? Remember him, the guy who no longer has a life to go back to."

"I remember, Donna. See, unlike you two, judging by the looks of you, I haven't spent the past eight years trying to drink myself into forgetting. I remember Kelso. And I remember us. All of us. And there isn't a day that goes by that I don't wish Kelso was still alive."

Eric couldn't believe Hyde could stand their and judge he and Donna after all the damage he and Jackie had done. "What a self-righteous son of a bitch you are, Hyde." Eric said, with a snort.

Hyde wasn't done with Eric and Donna yet. "Jackie and I have a good life. And we've forgiven ourselves for whatever part we played in Kelso's death. And we've forgiven you two and that's the end of it for us. You might wanna try it." Hyde looked the couple in front of him up and down, trying to think of who they reminded him of. "It doesn't really look like your way is working."

And then it hit him - Bud and Edna. Eric and Donna reminded him of Bud and Edna. Drunk, and worn-out and angry at everything.

And with that, Hyde turned to leave. There was simply nothing left to say. If Hyde thought Eric and Donna would forgive him and Jackie, he would've stood out in the cold talking until he was blue in the face. But it only took one look into Eric and Donna's lifeless eyes to realize there would be no forgiveness.

Donna could've let it go, but she had eight years of anger inside of her and she was going to let it out on Hyde. "You've forgiven yourselves?" She laughed, bitterly and watched as Hyde slowly turned back around to face her. "Well isn't that so _great_ for you guys." She tossed her cigarette in the snow and took a step towards Hyde. "See, we'd like to forgive you two. But we're not really into forgiving murderers. I guess Eric and I are kinda funny that way."

"Donna." Hyde sighed, not wanting to sound patronizing but wanting to help the two completely defeated people who were once his best friends. "It'll destroy you." His blue eyes bared into her and she suddenly wished he still had sunglasses on. "If you don't make peace with what happened, it'll destroy you."

The words seemed lost on Eric and Donna as their expressions remained unchanged. And Hyde knew then, that it was too late. His words were too late. It had already happened.

Hyde resumed his walk towards his car expecting, but never hearing another word from either Eric or Donna. When he reached the car, he opened the door and climbed in. He shut the door behind him and turned to Jackie and his little girl. They both stared at him with identical eyes. He gave them a weak smile and kissed each quickly before starting the car. He hoped his daughter hadn't been able to hear the argument. With one last turn over his shoulder he silently said good-bye to Eric and Donna. Jackie followed Hyde's eyes and looked for herself.

It made her heart break to see them that way. And she thanked God, again, for that priest who had forced her all those years ago to stop blaming and stop hating. _'That,' _she thought as she stared at Eric and Donna, 'is what hate does to you.'

* * *

Pacing the floor of her apartment, cigarette in hand, Donna practically wore out the dingy carpet underneath her stomping feet. Eric watched her silently from his place at the table. He knew her well enough to know that he should just leave her be. So, instead of trying to talk to her, he finished off another beer. Had he looked up, he would have seen his wife wiping a wayward tear from her flushed cheek. 

"I can't believe they came back here." Donna said for what Eric was sure was the tenth time. "They have no right to be here."

"Donna ..."

She didn't even let him finish. "They were happy, Eric. Did you see them playing with their kid? They're happy. They're not supposed to be happy."

Donna couldn't get the images out of her mind. Hyde tossing his daughter in the air as she squealed. Jackie caressing Hyde's face and kissing him, tenderly. The way Hyde had instinctively protected Jackie and their little girl, the way he held them both. As the images flashed through Donna's brain, they meshed with the fog of alcohol and the images of Kelso. Kelso, being beaten in the Forman's driveway by Hyde. Kelso, his face a bloody mess as he lay by the side of the road. The combination of the images of Hyde and Kelso waged a battle in Donna's mind; the alcohol only acting to blur the images of the two men.

And then she thought of Jackie and Hyde's daughter. Their beautiful, perfect daughter. Donna had never gotten to meet her daughter, or son. She had never even known what sex her two lost babies had been. Why had two children been taken from her when Jackie had been given one? There was no fairness in life. If there were, she would never be forced to make the decision she was about to make.

She knew what she had to do. Jackie and Hyde weren't going to get their happy ending. Not if Kelso didn't get one. Not if she and Eric didn't get one.

Blindly, she crossed the room quickly tripping over Eric's feet in the process.

"Donna, what the hell are you doing?"

"I ... I have to," was all she could come up with.

She picked up the phone sitting on their coffee table and dialed the number she had memorized eight years ago. And then, she waited.

"Officer Williams? It's Donna Forman. I just thought you might want to know Steven Hyde's back in town."

* * *

I know. I'm mean. 

Please review :)


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